Read Online The Bed and Breakfast Star by Jacqueline Wilson - Free Book Online
Authors: Jacqueline Wilson
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living in the lovely house and we were almost an ordinary family and even Mack didn’t smack. Well, not so much.
It was a bit depressing though. They gave me all these tests and stuff and I couldn’t do a lot of it. They thought I was thick. I thought I was thick. I had to go to these extra classes to help me with my reading and my writing and my sums. The other kids laughed at me.
I like it when people laugh at my jokes. But I can’t stand it when they laugh at me .
But I had this really great remedial teacher, Mr Jamieson, only everyone called him Jamie, even us kids. He was very gentle and he didn’t yell at you when you couldn’t do something. He worked with me and whenever I learnt the least little thing he smiled and stuck his thumb up and said I was doing really fine. So I felt fine and I learnt a lot more and then Jamie got me to do some other tests and it turned out I wasn’t thick at all. I was INTELLIGENT.
Jamie asked me about all the other schools and he said that it was no wonder I hadn’t been able to learn much, because I’d had so many changes. But now I could get stuck in and swoop through all the stuff I didn’t know and Jamie said I’d soon end up top of the class, not bottom. So there.
But then Mack lost his job and we lost our house and we ended up in the Oyal Htl, miles and miles and miles away from my old school.
Still, if I had to go to school, that was the one I wanted to go to. So that I could still see Jamie.
‘Of course you can’t go, Elsa. You’d have to get two buses. And then walk miles. We can’t afford the fares. And you’d wear out your trainers in weeks. No, you’re to go to this Mayberry School where the other kids go.’
Only they didn’t all go, of course. Naomi went. The Asian kids went. One or two others. But Funny-Face and nearly all the boys bunked off every day.
I decided that’s what I’d do. I might know I was intelligent, but this school might give me the wrong sort of tests. I could easily end up being thought thick all over again. There was no guarantee at all I’d find another Jamie.
I started hanging around more with Funny-Face and the others. I had to work hard to get them to like me. I had to tell them lots and lots of jokes. They soon got sick of my usual repertoire. Get that fancy word. I’m not thick. I know lots and lots of things, though they’re not usually the sort of things they like you to know in school. All comedians have to have a repertoire – it’s all the jokes in their act. So to impress Funny-Face and his Famous Five followers I had to tell a few rude jokes. Naughty jokes. Blue jokes. Dirty jokes. You know the sort.
The trouble was that Pippa still hung round me most of the time, and she heard some of the jokes too. I told her and told her and told her that she mustn’t repeat them, but one time she forgot. She told Mack.
And then guess what. SMACK.
‘It wasn’t my fault this time,’ said FunnyFace afterwards.
‘It was my fault,’ said Pippa, and she burst into tears.
‘You didn’t mean to,’ I said, giving her a cuddle. ‘Here, don’t cry, you soppy little thing. It’s me he smacked, not you.’
‘You don’t hardly ever cry,’ said Pippa.
‘She’s tough,’ said Funny-Face, and he sounded admiring.
‘Yeah, that’s me. Tough as old boots,’ I said, swaggering.
So on the Monday I was due to start school I set off with Naomi, but the minute we got down the road I veered off with Funny-Face and the Famous Five.
‘Hey, Elsa. Why don’t you come with me?’ Naomi said, looking disappointed. ‘I thought we were friends. Why do you want to go off with all the boys?’
‘We are friends, Naomi. Course we are. I just don’t want to go to this dopey old school, that’s all. I’ll see you after, same as usual, and we’ll play in the toilets and have fun.’
‘But it isn’t a dopey school, really. And I hoped we’d get to be in the same class. I even swopped desks with this other girl so
It was a bit depressing though. They gave me all these tests and stuff and I couldn’t do a lot of it. They thought I was thick. I thought I was thick. I had to go to these extra classes to help me with my reading and my writing and my sums. The other kids laughed at me.
I like it when people laugh at my jokes. But I can’t stand it when they laugh at me .
But I had this really great remedial teacher, Mr Jamieson, only everyone called him Jamie, even us kids. He was very gentle and he didn’t yell at you when you couldn’t do something. He worked with me and whenever I learnt the least little thing he smiled and stuck his thumb up and said I was doing really fine. So I felt fine and I learnt a lot more and then Jamie got me to do some other tests and it turned out I wasn’t thick at all. I was INTELLIGENT.
Jamie asked me about all the other schools and he said that it was no wonder I hadn’t been able to learn much, because I’d had so many changes. But now I could get stuck in and swoop through all the stuff I didn’t know and Jamie said I’d soon end up top of the class, not bottom. So there.
But then Mack lost his job and we lost our house and we ended up in the Oyal Htl, miles and miles and miles away from my old school.
Still, if I had to go to school, that was the one I wanted to go to. So that I could still see Jamie.
‘Of course you can’t go, Elsa. You’d have to get two buses. And then walk miles. We can’t afford the fares. And you’d wear out your trainers in weeks. No, you’re to go to this Mayberry School where the other kids go.’
Only they didn’t all go, of course. Naomi went. The Asian kids went. One or two others. But Funny-Face and nearly all the boys bunked off every day.
I decided that’s what I’d do. I might know I was intelligent, but this school might give me the wrong sort of tests. I could easily end up being thought thick all over again. There was no guarantee at all I’d find another Jamie.
I started hanging around more with Funny-Face and the others. I had to work hard to get them to like me. I had to tell them lots and lots of jokes. They soon got sick of my usual repertoire. Get that fancy word. I’m not thick. I know lots and lots of things, though they’re not usually the sort of things they like you to know in school. All comedians have to have a repertoire – it’s all the jokes in their act. So to impress Funny-Face and his Famous Five followers I had to tell a few rude jokes. Naughty jokes. Blue jokes. Dirty jokes. You know the sort.
The trouble was that Pippa still hung round me most of the time, and she heard some of the jokes too. I told her and told her and told her that she mustn’t repeat them, but one time she forgot. She told Mack.
And then guess what. SMACK.
‘It wasn’t my fault this time,’ said FunnyFace afterwards.
‘It was my fault,’ said Pippa, and she burst into tears.
‘You didn’t mean to,’ I said, giving her a cuddle. ‘Here, don’t cry, you soppy little thing. It’s me he smacked, not you.’
‘You don’t hardly ever cry,’ said Pippa.
‘She’s tough,’ said Funny-Face, and he sounded admiring.
‘Yeah, that’s me. Tough as old boots,’ I said, swaggering.
So on the Monday I was due to start school I set off with Naomi, but the minute we got down the road I veered off with Funny-Face and the Famous Five.
‘Hey, Elsa. Why don’t you come with me?’ Naomi said, looking disappointed. ‘I thought we were friends. Why do you want to go off with all the boys?’
‘We are friends, Naomi. Course we are. I just don’t want to go to this dopey old school, that’s all. I’ll see you after, same as usual, and we’ll play in the toilets and have fun.’
‘But it isn’t a dopey school, really. And I hoped we’d get to be in the same class. I even swopped desks with this other girl so
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