Read Online The Bathrobe Knight: Volume 3 by Charles Dean - Free Book Online
Authors: Charles Dean
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report,” Kitchens offered with a shrug. It wasn’t the most positive possible outcome, but it was still a very real possibility.
“Or it could be a ZombCone!” Minx added, gigglier than usual, even after her grossed out reaction. “Maybe that is their fallen friend, risen back as a delicious dark dessert to be eaten. Every time he kills another player, a new topping is added. Soon, he’ll be granted nuts and chocolate chips!”
Darwin was almost tempted to join in on her wild speculations, but instead decided to just get the dungeon going before any guessing about the blue or red snow cones’ origins came into play. “Alright, you know what, I’ll just kill the yellow snow cones with Mclean and Daniel. Minx, if you don’t want to help with them, how about you work with Kitchens and Fuzzy Wuzzy to keep those red and blue ones off us. Daniel, I know you’re going to be fighting with me, but try to watch the behavior of that black one. Let me know if anything funny starts to happen, or if you have a guess as to what role it has.”
“Wait, you’re going to make me put my hands into yellow snow cones?” Mclean gasped. She obviously wasn’t hot about the idea either.
“Hopefully it’ll just be your daggers,” Daniel chuckled.
“I’m just happy it’s not my job.” Kitchens patted Minx on the head. “Good job, Minx.”
Fuzzy Wuzzy growled his approval too.
“Okay, you two go pull them. We’ll sneak through and gank their healers.” Darwin gave out the orders, pulling out his giant, flaming zweihander. He expected the fight to start right away, but Kitchens held up his hand as if to pause and stopped everyone.
“Wait, what does ‘gank’ mean?” he asked, showing his age.
“You’re not too old to play, are you?” Mclean smirked at him. “It means gang shank, group kill, surprise stab. I don’t know. It’s something like that. It just means that Darwin, Daniel and I are all going to go attack the same target at once while all the others are focused on you three.”
“Ah, fair enough. Carry on then.” Kitchens pulled out his sword and began his samurai-stride towards the first enemy.
Darwin and his group of yellow-snow-cone-killers waited patiently as Minx, Kitchens and Fuzzy Wuzzy each went up and started attacking the enemy snow cones. At first, it looked like Kitchens was simply going to do his usual trick where he walked up and cut one of the enemies in half, but as his blade made contact with one of the snow cones, a giant hexagonal shield blocked his katana before it even got close to shaving any ice off his target. Two giant icicles appeared behind one of the red snow cones and flew at Kitchens, forcing him to step back and deflect them with his blade. Minx and Fuzzy Wuzzy ran into the same bad luck, except Fuzzy Wuzzy couldn’t dodge and ended up being impaled by one of the ice blades. Fortunately for Fuzzy Wuzzy, it didn’t seem to do much damage, but the roar he let out when it hit sounded pretty bad.
“Crap, I’m going to sub for Fuzzy Wuzzy,” Darwin decided after he saw the event. “Daniel, Mclean, you two go hit that healer. Fuzzy Wuzzy, retreat until they stop attacking you.” Darwin almost said, ‘until you lose aggro,’ but didn’t know if the bear could understand commands that were laid out in gamer speak. ‘Aggro’ was a common word among gamers, but he couldn’t be positive it was put into the game’s lexicon for recognizable phrases, and he still wasn’t sure what type of system gave Fuzzy Wuzzy intelligence or even how intelligent he was to begin with.
Darwin jumped between the black bear and a series of fresh icicles coming from the red snow cones just in time to block them before his pet took any more damage. Then, after having deflected the red snow cone’s attack, he swung at one of the blue cones to try and inflict some damage. Just like with Kitchens, however, his blade harmlessly clanked off a magical set of yellow hexagons that popped up
“Or it could be a ZombCone!” Minx added, gigglier than usual, even after her grossed out reaction. “Maybe that is their fallen friend, risen back as a delicious dark dessert to be eaten. Every time he kills another player, a new topping is added. Soon, he’ll be granted nuts and chocolate chips!”
Darwin was almost tempted to join in on her wild speculations, but instead decided to just get the dungeon going before any guessing about the blue or red snow cones’ origins came into play. “Alright, you know what, I’ll just kill the yellow snow cones with Mclean and Daniel. Minx, if you don’t want to help with them, how about you work with Kitchens and Fuzzy Wuzzy to keep those red and blue ones off us. Daniel, I know you’re going to be fighting with me, but try to watch the behavior of that black one. Let me know if anything funny starts to happen, or if you have a guess as to what role it has.”
“Wait, you’re going to make me put my hands into yellow snow cones?” Mclean gasped. She obviously wasn’t hot about the idea either.
“Hopefully it’ll just be your daggers,” Daniel chuckled.
“I’m just happy it’s not my job.” Kitchens patted Minx on the head. “Good job, Minx.”
Fuzzy Wuzzy growled his approval too.
“Okay, you two go pull them. We’ll sneak through and gank their healers.” Darwin gave out the orders, pulling out his giant, flaming zweihander. He expected the fight to start right away, but Kitchens held up his hand as if to pause and stopped everyone.
“Wait, what does ‘gank’ mean?” he asked, showing his age.
“You’re not too old to play, are you?” Mclean smirked at him. “It means gang shank, group kill, surprise stab. I don’t know. It’s something like that. It just means that Darwin, Daniel and I are all going to go attack the same target at once while all the others are focused on you three.”
“Ah, fair enough. Carry on then.” Kitchens pulled out his sword and began his samurai-stride towards the first enemy.
Darwin and his group of yellow-snow-cone-killers waited patiently as Minx, Kitchens and Fuzzy Wuzzy each went up and started attacking the enemy snow cones. At first, it looked like Kitchens was simply going to do his usual trick where he walked up and cut one of the enemies in half, but as his blade made contact with one of the snow cones, a giant hexagonal shield blocked his katana before it even got close to shaving any ice off his target. Two giant icicles appeared behind one of the red snow cones and flew at Kitchens, forcing him to step back and deflect them with his blade. Minx and Fuzzy Wuzzy ran into the same bad luck, except Fuzzy Wuzzy couldn’t dodge and ended up being impaled by one of the ice blades. Fortunately for Fuzzy Wuzzy, it didn’t seem to do much damage, but the roar he let out when it hit sounded pretty bad.
“Crap, I’m going to sub for Fuzzy Wuzzy,” Darwin decided after he saw the event. “Daniel, Mclean, you two go hit that healer. Fuzzy Wuzzy, retreat until they stop attacking you.” Darwin almost said, ‘until you lose aggro,’ but didn’t know if the bear could understand commands that were laid out in gamer speak. ‘Aggro’ was a common word among gamers, but he couldn’t be positive it was put into the game’s lexicon for recognizable phrases, and he still wasn’t sure what type of system gave Fuzzy Wuzzy intelligence or even how intelligent he was to begin with.
Darwin jumped between the black bear and a series of fresh icicles coming from the red snow cones just in time to block them before his pet took any more damage. Then, after having deflected the red snow cone’s attack, he swung at one of the blue cones to try and inflict some damage. Just like with Kitchens, however, his blade harmlessly clanked off a magical set of yellow hexagons that popped up
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