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Authors: Charles Dean
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that she had obviously saved for later and tossed it to Darwin.
Darwin looked at the red ball in his hands with suspicion. Half of him wanted to just agree with Kitchens and toss it back to her, but everyone was eyeing him like he was the first one in the group to test a rickety bridge. Minx wasn’t showing any signs of being affected yet, and while that did little to assure him that the snow cone wasn’t poisonous, it did make him feel intensely pressured to try it. They’re going to think I’m a chicken if I don’t, aren’t they? He sighed, stuck out his tongue and gave the red ball a lick. Holy crud! It’s cherry flavored!
“This is wonderful. You guys have to try it,” he said, breaking the giant ball he had been given by Minx into smaller bits and passing it around to everyone except Fuzzy Wuzzy. The bear was already working away at his own blue snowball, which Minx appeared to be in the process of taking away and trying to use as a hat for him.
“I didn’t realize dungeons in this game came with snacks,” Mclean said, biting into the red snowball. “But you are right, this is tasty.”
"Why wouldn't they come with edible delights?” Darwin laughed. “I’ve been using dungeons as a food source for the NPCs since the very first one.”
“Well, I mean, there is still one question regarding these snow cones. . .” Daniel greedily took another bite of his. “Do they have enough sugar to be served in an American restaurant? Will they make our guildmates grow wider more quickly than they grow stronger?”
“You’re worried about weight gain in a video game? If you don’t want to put on pixels, why didn’t you just alter your character’s appearance in the creation menu?” Mclean shook her head. “Aren’t girls supposed to be the ones worried about packing on the pounds?”
“Well, new day, new standards. Can’t be chubby cheeks and pull all of the mad ladies like me.” Daniel flexed once or twice in the most over-exaggerated manner he could.
“You have a girlfriend?” Darwin asked curiously.
“Um . . . No, but at least I have the body to get one!” Daniel flexed one more time.
“Yeah . . . that’s not how it works.” Mclean bopped Daniel on the back of his head. “Dufus.”
Now is as good a time as any. Darwin sighed, not wanting to actually broach this subject with the gang yet. “Actually, there is something I need to talk to you guys about.” Darwin took another bite of his own cherry-flavored treat. The dungeon hadn’t even really started yet, and the whole group, other than Kitchens, was quietly eating away at their dessert as if they were celebrating a hard-earned victory over the boss.
“Wait, you’re not gonna tell us you’re actually a fat forty-year-old with hygiene problems, are you? I mean, I did have my suspicions, especially with how much you like milk and cookies, but I wasn’t gonna say anything, boss.” Daniel’s joke caused both Minx and Mclean to cringe at the mental image.
“What? No. Heck no.” Darwin did his best to defend himself against the idea, but he knew the image would still be stuck in everyone’s minds for a good while once it had been put out there. “I was going to tell you . . . I kind of have a skill problem.”
“You mean how you don’t have any? Yeah, we all saw you practicing with Alex. You’re getting a lot better at it. Don’t worry, it’s okay to be really bad for a while after the beginning of a game. Most people only know how to swing a sword from watching some space opera or medieval fantasy where they just thrash around in a way that looks pretty for the camera.” Daniel continued to guess wrongly, most likely on purpose just to mess with Darwin.
Darwin sighed. “No, I mean one of my skills is causing me a lot of trouble,” he said, trying to finish this time before Daniel could volunteer something more embarrassing or insulting.
“A class skill?” Kitchens’ eyes opened wider. “Tell me more about it. I
Darwin looked at the red ball in his hands with suspicion. Half of him wanted to just agree with Kitchens and toss it back to her, but everyone was eyeing him like he was the first one in the group to test a rickety bridge. Minx wasn’t showing any signs of being affected yet, and while that did little to assure him that the snow cone wasn’t poisonous, it did make him feel intensely pressured to try it. They’re going to think I’m a chicken if I don’t, aren’t they? He sighed, stuck out his tongue and gave the red ball a lick. Holy crud! It’s cherry flavored!
“This is wonderful. You guys have to try it,” he said, breaking the giant ball he had been given by Minx into smaller bits and passing it around to everyone except Fuzzy Wuzzy. The bear was already working away at his own blue snowball, which Minx appeared to be in the process of taking away and trying to use as a hat for him.
“I didn’t realize dungeons in this game came with snacks,” Mclean said, biting into the red snowball. “But you are right, this is tasty.”
"Why wouldn't they come with edible delights?” Darwin laughed. “I’ve been using dungeons as a food source for the NPCs since the very first one.”
“Well, I mean, there is still one question regarding these snow cones. . .” Daniel greedily took another bite of his. “Do they have enough sugar to be served in an American restaurant? Will they make our guildmates grow wider more quickly than they grow stronger?”
“You’re worried about weight gain in a video game? If you don’t want to put on pixels, why didn’t you just alter your character’s appearance in the creation menu?” Mclean shook her head. “Aren’t girls supposed to be the ones worried about packing on the pounds?”
“Well, new day, new standards. Can’t be chubby cheeks and pull all of the mad ladies like me.” Daniel flexed once or twice in the most over-exaggerated manner he could.
“You have a girlfriend?” Darwin asked curiously.
“Um . . . No, but at least I have the body to get one!” Daniel flexed one more time.
“Yeah . . . that’s not how it works.” Mclean bopped Daniel on the back of his head. “Dufus.”
Now is as good a time as any. Darwin sighed, not wanting to actually broach this subject with the gang yet. “Actually, there is something I need to talk to you guys about.” Darwin took another bite of his own cherry-flavored treat. The dungeon hadn’t even really started yet, and the whole group, other than Kitchens, was quietly eating away at their dessert as if they were celebrating a hard-earned victory over the boss.
“Wait, you’re not gonna tell us you’re actually a fat forty-year-old with hygiene problems, are you? I mean, I did have my suspicions, especially with how much you like milk and cookies, but I wasn’t gonna say anything, boss.” Daniel’s joke caused both Minx and Mclean to cringe at the mental image.
“What? No. Heck no.” Darwin did his best to defend himself against the idea, but he knew the image would still be stuck in everyone’s minds for a good while once it had been put out there. “I was going to tell you . . . I kind of have a skill problem.”
“You mean how you don’t have any? Yeah, we all saw you practicing with Alex. You’re getting a lot better at it. Don’t worry, it’s okay to be really bad for a while after the beginning of a game. Most people only know how to swing a sword from watching some space opera or medieval fantasy where they just thrash around in a way that looks pretty for the camera.” Daniel continued to guess wrongly, most likely on purpose just to mess with Darwin.
Darwin sighed. “No, I mean one of my skills is causing me a lot of trouble,” he said, trying to finish this time before Daniel could volunteer something more embarrassing or insulting.
“A class skill?” Kitchens’ eyes opened wider. “Tell me more about it. I
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