The Accidental Wife

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Authors: Simi K. Rao
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voice from the others. He knew that she, along with the rest of his small family, had arrived with much fanfare ten minutes ago when Uncle Rajbir’s ancient khattara Mercedes had pulled up in the driveway. Had the main purpose of their visit bypassed their minds in the excitement of meeting the rest of the clan? He didn’t think so.
    What should I do? I can’t just hide here in my room and wait for someone to break the door down! Naina is right. I have to face the music. And if my mother tries to twist my arm into getting hooked to her beloved Renu or somebody else, I will put my foot down and say I’ll remain loyal to my wife as long as I live, even if she doesn’t care for me!
    The thought conjured up Naina’s impassioned face, and with it came a sense of emptiness immediately supplanted by fury at himself. How could he waste time thinking about her? Certainly she had no place in his life. None whatsoever.
    He was jolted out of his musings by a couple of piercing, loud whistles. He rushed out onto the balcony. There, he saw standing right below him a slim girl dressed all in white who was shielding her face with a thick dupatta. She was also waving wildly at him.
    “Who in hell are you?” he shouted irritably, in no mood for congeniality, particularly with a female of the species.
    “Hush, you idiot! Tum toh bilkul gadhe nikle! (You’ve turned out to be a complete ass!) It’s me, Naina!” she said, lifting her veil while casting a wary glance around. “Who else do you think would try to attract your attention like this? So don’t just stand there and stare. Give me a hand up!”
    “What a weird woman you are,” Rihaan observed with a perplexed smile, noting an immediate dissipation of his anxieties.
    “Jaldi! Before I change my mind!”
    Her words were enough to prompt him to propel his legs over the railing and jump down.
    She inquired of him, “Don’t you know of the blanket trick? Picture nahin dekhte kya?” (Don’t you watch movies?)
    “No. I think lifting you up would be quicker and far more efficient. You are such a tiny thing anyway,” he said smiling at her. It had escaped him until now that she was indeed quite small and delicate. Her forceful personality made her appear larger than life.
    She snorted and managed to look offended.
    “C’mon, we have no time to waste!” he urged, cupping his hands together and going down on his haunches.
    She looked unconvinced, but without saying another word removed her flip-flops and placed a dainty foot in his hands. Then using his shoulders as a step ladder, reached up for the iron railing and attempted to haul herself up.
    Without a fraction’s hesitation, Rihaan positioned both his hands on her backside and pushed hard, hoisting her upward. Then ignoring her appalled gasp, he followed immediately behind.
    “How dare you handle me so intimately?” she exclaimed, her fair complexion hot and flushed.
    “There is no place for modesty right now. Besides, feminine anatomy doesn’t affect me,” he retorted promptly, though he experienced quite the contrary.
    But he wouldn’t admit that to her, or even to himself. Instead he snapped brusquely, “Why did you come here? Did you suddenly take a liking to honesty?”
    She burst into a loud laugh, not appearing in the least affronted. “I felt bad for you. At first I thought I would let your mother make a bharta of you, then…” She shrugged her shoulders. “…I felt remorseful and chose to come to your aid. Besides, I was curious to meet your tyrant mama.” She smiled with a cheeky grin.
    “I don’t know what to say,” Rihaan muttered. She had managed to upset his rhythm and it annoyed him.
    “Don’t say anything, then. Let’s proceed,” she smiled, as if well aware of the effect she was having on him and ambled over to the door.
    “Hey, you can’t go down like that!” Rihaan said, suddenly remembering the red box his aunt had given him. It was still lying on the floor at the exact spot

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