TO change the subject. Witnessing the hurt in Ryanâs eyes when he spoke about his mother was a shot to the heart and she feared she was only making the situation worse by dredging up the past. Some topics werenât good to revisit.
Ryan did it for her when he stood and took his mug to the sink, mumbling something about making plans for the day.
And it could just be the fact that she was missing her own father that made her want to heal Ryanâs relationships. Speaking of her family, she needed to talk to her sister.
âDid you say that you saw my cell?â she asked while he seemed to intently focus on whatever he had going on in the sink.
He stopped what he was doing for a second.
âIs there something going on with my phone?â she asked.
âAre you sure you want it? That thing hasnât stopped vibrating and buzzing.â
âWhat did you do with it?â
âNothing. Well, I turned it off. You needed to rest and I was afraid it would wake you. I brought it out here and then it kept me up, which is the other reason I slept in that chair last night.â
Normally, the thought of her smartphone being stuffed inside a drawer or tucked away on a counter would create a level-five panic. In this case, she was grateful. Everyone would most likely be trying to figure out what was going on with her or sending their condolences. Even though people were well-intentioned and she would get back to them as soon as she could, she wasnât strong enough to face it yet.
âWe need to stop by the funeral home later today to make the arrangements,â he said.
âDid they call?â
âNo. I made contact with them. I knew you and your sister werenât in the right place to be able to handle it yet. I didnât want them leaving messages, so I figured Iâd reach out and keep them posted on your progress. They said theyâd have someone available early evening today, after closing, so youâd be assured privacy.â
Ryan had no idea how comforting those words truly were. âCan we go see Lori and Grayson after?â
âI have a few things to take care of tonight. We can leave for Arkansas first thing in the morning. Weâll go at first light.â
âGreat.â She could live with that. Besides, that would give her another night of rest to heal. As it was, she was afraid that sheâd scare her nephew. She could hide the bruises with makeup.
Most of the day she spent curled up on the couch watching TV.
Lisa was determined to dress herself. Ryan had washed her clothes and it felt good to have on something clean that fit. The drive to the funeral home went by quickly.
There were only two cars in the parking lot when they arrived. She noticed a late-model blue sedan parked near the front door. The second, a pickup truck, was positioned around the side of the building. The bed was loaded with mulch and equipment that looked like gardening supplies. The sun was bright. It wouldnât be dark in this part of Texas for three hours and yet the place still had a creepy feel to it.
Maybe it was the knowledge that there was so much death around her that made the hairs on her neck prick. Or the fact that she knew her father lay inside, breathless, gone.
Tears welled, stinging the backs of her eyes.
âCan we stop by my place on the way home?â she asked. âI need to pick up clothes and makeup.â
Ryan seemed to pick up on her anxiety because he leaned forward and kissed her on the forehead before helping her out of his SUV. He held out his hand. She took it, the warmth in his touch calming her, and ignored the pain shooting through her chest with every step toward the sales office. This pain was different than what sheâd felt for the past few days. She felt that, too. This hurt from the inside out, sucked the air from her lungs in one whoosh and made her want to fold onto her knees and cry without stopping.
The emotions that she
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