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north, even shifters, and I still don’t know what the hell they were doing on her pack’s land. One had gone feral and…” He shook his head and glanced away, unable to meet her gaze. Every time he thought of the way he’d failed his mate, shame filled him.
    Ella laid her head back down on his chest and for that he was grateful. He started stroking down her spine again. “Two of them rushed me. I managed to kill them, but by the time I was done the feral one had killed her. I…put him down too, but it was too late.” He closed his eyes, but it didn’t do much to dull the memories.
    “I’m sorry, Asher,” she whispered, the sincerity in her voice wrapping around him with warmth. “Do you…has that affected your view on jaguar shifters?” she asked carefully.
    He understood what she was tiptoeing around and automatically tightened his grip. “No. I was angry for a long time, but I never hated all jaguar shifters because of what a few did.” That kind of thinking was just ignorant and he’d never allowed himself to get sucked into that darkness. That kind of hate would have eaten him alive.
    Ella slightly relaxed. “Is that why you’ve been a lone wolf for so long?”
    He nodded, his chin brushing against the top of her head. “Yeah, I was so ashamed—”
    Her head popped up at that, her expression surprised. “Ashamed?”
    “I couldn’t protect her. It was my fault.” God, he’d been too young, too weak, a failure. It was part of the reason he’d gone into the military, to train himself so that he’d never fail his loved ones again. All those fucking insecurities surged back up after years of keeping them locked down. The thought of something happening to Ella made him go cold, the iciness cutting him bone deep.
    “Did her pack blame you?” There was an unexpected bite of anger to her question.
    Surprised, he shook his head. “No.” There had been no blame or rage from them. But he wished they had blamed him. Unable to take their pitying looks, he’d left and had never stopped roaming. Until now.
    Ella watched him intently and for a moment he thought she was going to give him a speech about how it wasn’t his fault. Taking him by surprise again, she kissed him. Hard.
    Moving lightning fast, she slid over him so that her body was stretched out over his, her knees settling on either side of his hips as her lips and tongue tangled with his.
    Groaning, he arched into her. He’d wanted to tell her about his past so she knew where he was coming from, but he hadn’t wanted her to feel sorry for him.
    Abruptly, he pulled his head back, though it pained him to do so. His wolf clawed at him, demanding he claim Ella’s sweet mouth again. “Is this out of pity?” he demanded.
    At that, she laughed once, the sound sharp and loud. “Are you kidding me? Can’t you scent how much I want you?”
    Yeah, but he’d needed the confirmation. Growling low in his throat, he fisted her hips and flipped them so that she was underneath him. “I can,” he murmured, rocking his erection against the softness between her thighs. “And now you can feel how much I want you.”

 
    Chapter 8
     
    Ella looked up at Asher, who was poised above her, his expression almost fierce. His green eyes seemed to glow in the dark room. She’d known he wouldn’t let her ride him. Not this first time. Her experience with him in the hotel had told her that. The man was just too alpha.
    His pants were still on as he straddled her, something she wanted to change immediately. After getting a taste of him in that hotel room, she’d known once with him would never be enough. And she desperately wanted to see what she’d been fantasizing about since running out on him.
    “Lose the pants,” she murmured.
    His head tilted slightly to the side, his eyes narrowing a fraction. “Are you ordering me around?”
    She grinned. “Maybe.”
    “Put your hands on the headboard,” he said softly, the dominating note in his words reaching