Sunlit Shadow Dance
engine which ran
sweetly. The car had a couple minor dints in the body work, but
they were trivial, and the upholstery had seen better days. But it
was sound and as good as could be expected for nineteen hundred
dollars. Cash was king and Buck had negotiated down from the asking
price of $3000.
    It was
registered in Buck’s name at his own family farm address in
Queensland, down near Rockhampton. The story given was that Vic was
just driving it down there as a favour to him, and then it would
serve as a second farm car. Buck had made it clear that if it was a
lemon he would be paying the car agent a visit on his next trip to
Cairns and looking for a refund, and he had a persuasive manner
about him when needed.
    It was a slow
drive over unfamiliar roads to reach the isolated aboriginal
community where Jane lived, and it was long after dark before
distant lights came into view. He felt anxious about how she would
react to him turning up announced, late at night. But he was driven
to keep going, regardless of how he was received. Most of all he
just wanted to see her again.
    He would have
to play the encounter by ear. It seemed a huge ask to say to a
girl, who barely knew him, to come away with him. He felt somehow
foolish for proposing it, though his mind and emotions joined
together in telling him this was what he needed to do.
    He was certain
her safety was a terribly precarious thing, particularly if she
suddenly became the centre of attention over something she had no
prior knowledge of. It would be a disaster if they returned her to
jail and took her children away.
    His emotions
for her were a complex mix of a hundred things but first and
foremost he felt hugely protective of both her and her children,
very conscious his contact with her and telling others could bring
her undoing.
    He was glad
when he pulled up outside that a light was still on in her cottage,
hoping that meant she was still awake. He sat in the car for a few
seconds composing himself. Then, realizing that planning was
pointless at this stage, he opened the car door and walked towards
the house. He was glad there were no other houses nearby, just the
bulk of the back of the shop 50 meters away. He was also glad there
were no dogs barking.
    He knocked on
the door and another light came on, lighting the outside. She stood
there with the light behind her, illuminated in silhouette. She was
wearing a light slip, not quite a nightie but something similar. It
illuminated the outline of her body. He felt a huge rush of
affection for her, this new Jane who seemed to have occupied his
Susan’s body. He wanted to take her to him, hold her close and give
her reassurance, as she stood there looking uncertainly into the
outside night, seeking to make an identification.
    His voice came
out a bit croaky, “Jane, I needed to see you again.”
    Now
recognition came to her, half puzzled, half welcoming, another bit
apprehensive. “Vic?”
    He continued,
“I am sorry I did not get here until it was so late. I hope I have
not frightened you.”
    As he spoke
she seemed to relax. She opened the door to invite him in. They
stood facing each other, a meter apart. He knew he needed to
connect with her in a way that went beyond words.
    He put out his
hands to greet her and she responded in kind, a mirror. He walked
forward a step and took her small hands in his. They felt so
delicate, even though hardened with manual work. She gave him a
tentative smile, such an open and trusting face.
    All his
rehearsed words fell away, he looked at her and she looked back at
him with a curious intensity, as if seeing him for the first time.
He released one of her hands and put his hand to her cheek and
stroked it. She brought her hand to his hand and squeezed it,
softly. Almost unconsciously she stepped forward, moving towards
him, their bodies were almost touching.
    He put his
arms around her shoulders and pulled her into the small gap until
all the space was gone. As he felt her body come

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