“He puts his finger to his nose and he becomes so small and skinny, he can come right through.” I strained my little mind trying to see him. She also put up a manger set, which I stared at a lot, the sheep and the big star. My favourite was the Baby Jesus. Sometimes I would sneak him away when I had to go to bed, but most of the time I’d put him back again because the others would miss him. Like his mom and dad, looking there and suddenly nothing in their manger! I wrapped six pennies for Mom and Dad, but the night before I took the pennies to bed with me one more time. The next morning we kids all got up and I ran down to place my gift under the tree. I think our parents had had a drunk the night before and they had locked their door, so we started opening our stuff. We had all received toy instruments like drums or pipes, and we started to dance and sing, yelling around, beating or blowing our instruments, we didn’t know how to play them, until we formed a parade and danced through the big house, up one stairs and down the other, snaking through rooms and under tables, one behind the other. We heard Dad yell far away, but we just giggled and kept on, working ourselves into a frenzy until he was right over us. A lot of yelling, a few side kicks to the ass or a hit and a shove on the back of the head, and we had to clean up the mess; Christmas was over before it got started.
But my penny present was still under the tree, so I took it and gave it to Mom and Dad while they lay in bed. Then Mom got up, went to the kitchen, and started to cook, like always.
One Christmas, Leon got a chemistry set, so he mixed things together at random and made Kathy and me drink it, no matter how terrible it tasted. He said it was like the mad doctor in the movies, and we were his helpers, we had to. He always had some story to fool us into doing what he wanted. The set was soon taken away from him. Another time he got a bow-and-arrow outfit, but Earl broke it when he caught him shooting at us as we tried to run away.
The two boys were the oldest in the family, and for a short while Mom let them babysit; she said no one but our family would babysit us, such wild kids with no manners. When Karen was a bit older she had to do it, and then Karen also got the authority to discipline us. Karen and Minnie would gang up on Kathy and me, and make us keep the house clean and neat. Leon was big by then, and I think that, to protect herself from Leon, Karen forfeited us two smallest girls to him for whatever dangerous games he wanted to play; she only reported him to Mom when he hurt her. Leon would protect us, both from Karen’s demands and from Mom and Dad, if we did what he wanted.
It seems to me now Earl hardly ever spoke to me or Kathy. But he helped us, he stopped Leon from rolling us two down the big stairs in a blanket just to see how we’d bump and scream. Another time Earl yelled at us for dropping our pants and racing down the hall to the toilet to see who could pee first. He was coming out as we crashed to get in, and he warned us to always go inside first, then lock the door, before we pulled our pants down.
Did Earl really care much for me? It was Leon who always seems to have been around. He never left me alone. I remember an argument broke out between him and Dad and Earl. I don’t know about Earl, but Leon and Dad were fighting horribly. Dad beat Leon. He yelled things like: “I worked since I was fifteen, I joined the Marines at seventeen and defended my country to the death, I sent money home to support my mom, and you useless piece of shit just helling around, always in trouble!”
Dad never gave up on “manliness” as he saw it. He was always the man, the Marine, as tough and mean a son of a bitch as theycome. Maybe that particular fight wasn’t actually so bad, as some were in our family, but to a little girl it was dreadful: Leon screaming and crying with Mom trying to protect him as usual and Dad yelling, “The
But my penny present was still under the tree, so I took it and gave it to Mom and Dad while they lay in bed. Then Mom got up, went to the kitchen, and started to cook, like always.
One Christmas, Leon got a chemistry set, so he mixed things together at random and made Kathy and me drink it, no matter how terrible it tasted. He said it was like the mad doctor in the movies, and we were his helpers, we had to. He always had some story to fool us into doing what he wanted. The set was soon taken away from him. Another time he got a bow-and-arrow outfit, but Earl broke it when he caught him shooting at us as we tried to run away.
The two boys were the oldest in the family, and for a short while Mom let them babysit; she said no one but our family would babysit us, such wild kids with no manners. When Karen was a bit older she had to do it, and then Karen also got the authority to discipline us. Karen and Minnie would gang up on Kathy and me, and make us keep the house clean and neat. Leon was big by then, and I think that, to protect herself from Leon, Karen forfeited us two smallest girls to him for whatever dangerous games he wanted to play; she only reported him to Mom when he hurt her. Leon would protect us, both from Karen’s demands and from Mom and Dad, if we did what he wanted.
It seems to me now Earl hardly ever spoke to me or Kathy. But he helped us, he stopped Leon from rolling us two down the big stairs in a blanket just to see how we’d bump and scream. Another time Earl yelled at us for dropping our pants and racing down the hall to the toilet to see who could pee first. He was coming out as we crashed to get in, and he warned us to always go inside first, then lock the door, before we pulled our pants down.
Did Earl really care much for me? It was Leon who always seems to have been around. He never left me alone. I remember an argument broke out between him and Dad and Earl. I don’t know about Earl, but Leon and Dad were fighting horribly. Dad beat Leon. He yelled things like: “I worked since I was fifteen, I joined the Marines at seventeen and defended my country to the death, I sent money home to support my mom, and you useless piece of shit just helling around, always in trouble!”
Dad never gave up on “manliness” as he saw it. He was always the man, the Marine, as tough and mean a son of a bitch as theycome. Maybe that particular fight wasn’t actually so bad, as some were in our family, but to a little girl it was dreadful: Leon screaming and crying with Mom trying to protect him as usual and Dad yelling, “The
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