perfect
for keeping cool at the venue last night, but in the harsh light of day the
alcohol stain stands out a mile and my pretty little dress does not go with the
big, clumsy Uggs I am stuck wearing - but hey, at least my feet are warm.
‘No
clean clothes,’ Luke calls out, still waist deep in the luggage compartment.
‘Unless you want something butch-looking that stinks of sweat.’
I
laugh, although to be honest I’m a bit distracted staring at his bum.
‘Don’t
worry, I’ll be fine,’ I eventually call back.
‘There
is this though,’ he says, standing up and holding up the biggest Two For The
Road t-shirt I have ever seen.
‘We’ve
sold a lot of merchandise this tour, which is lucky for us. Sucks for you
though, only extra large t-shirts left – but it’s got to be warmer than what
you’re wearing now, right? It will certainly cover more skin... unfortunately,’
he adds with a wink.
Taking
the huge t-shirt from him I hold it up against my body, you could fit at least
two of me in this, but I think I can make it work. Sadly I don’t think I can do
anything about the fact that it is bright orange, though.
‘This
will be perfect, don’t worry.’
I
head into the living area. No one is around so I can get changed here if I’m
fast. Mark and Eddie have gone to get something to eat and as far as I know Ben
is still sleeping. I check that I am totally alone one last time before
slipping off my beautiful dress and slipping on my huge, bright orange replacement.
I can’t imagine anyone wanting to wear one of these t-shirts, even if they are
a fan of the band, and surely if a person needed a shirt this big, they wouldn’t
want it to be bright orange? As I predicted, I look like I am wearing a tent,
but I’m not finished yet. If there’s one thing I learned during my short stint
at Brownies (I was way too edgy to cook, sew and collect crap that I found on
the floor in the park) it’s that you should always carry safety pins in your
bag. Pulling all the extra fabric from both sides, I pin them together in line
with the small of my back. My huge orange t-shirt now looks a bit more like a
dress. A bright orange, TFTR branded dress that doesn’t really clash too much
with my boots. To be honest, my gold accessories set it off quite nicely. I
don’t look too shocking and I’m definitely warmer.
Stepping
off the bus I see Mark, Luke and Eddie smoking, and they look very amused by my
outfit - probably because it’s free advertising for them.
‘Wilde,
what did you do to it?’ Luke asks, astonished. ‘It actually suits you!’
‘That’s
the thing with our Nicole, she can make anything look amazing, can’t you babe?’
Eddie says, taking a final drag on his cigarette and flicking it across the car
park.
‘You’re
too kind, boys,’ I say, embarrassed but flattered to hear Eddie refer to me as
theirs.
I
look over at Mark who is leaning on the bus. He hasn’t spoken to me today and I
don’t think he’s going to either.
‘We’d
better get a move on,’ Eddie says, jumping on aboard way too energetically for
someone who drank so much last night. ‘Luke, get that lazy bastard Ben up, will
you.’
‘I’m
on it!’ he replies, giving Eddie a playful smack on the bum as he follows him
up the stairs.
It’s
just me and Mark now. Awkward. If he’s not going to say anything then I guess
I’d better try.
‘How
are you today?’ I ask with a smile.
‘Fine,
cheers,’ he replies without even looking up.
‘Good,’
I say undefeated. ‘Not many dates left now, I bet you’ll miss it when it’s
over.’
‘Yep,
probably.’
This
is impossible. I was hoping that last night he was either too drunk to
remember, or at least too drunk to care, but I’m guessing he isn’t my biggest
fan right now.
‘I’ll
see you on the bus, yeah?’ I ask, but I don’t expect him to reply, and he
doesn’t. Then, the second my foot touches the first step, he calls after me.
‘I
hear you’re sharing a
for keeping cool at the venue last night, but in the harsh light of day the
alcohol stain stands out a mile and my pretty little dress does not go with the
big, clumsy Uggs I am stuck wearing - but hey, at least my feet are warm.
‘No
clean clothes,’ Luke calls out, still waist deep in the luggage compartment.
‘Unless you want something butch-looking that stinks of sweat.’
I
laugh, although to be honest I’m a bit distracted staring at his bum.
‘Don’t
worry, I’ll be fine,’ I eventually call back.
‘There
is this though,’ he says, standing up and holding up the biggest Two For The
Road t-shirt I have ever seen.
‘We’ve
sold a lot of merchandise this tour, which is lucky for us. Sucks for you
though, only extra large t-shirts left – but it’s got to be warmer than what
you’re wearing now, right? It will certainly cover more skin... unfortunately,’
he adds with a wink.
Taking
the huge t-shirt from him I hold it up against my body, you could fit at least
two of me in this, but I think I can make it work. Sadly I don’t think I can do
anything about the fact that it is bright orange, though.
‘This
will be perfect, don’t worry.’
I
head into the living area. No one is around so I can get changed here if I’m
fast. Mark and Eddie have gone to get something to eat and as far as I know Ben
is still sleeping. I check that I am totally alone one last time before
slipping off my beautiful dress and slipping on my huge, bright orange replacement.
I can’t imagine anyone wanting to wear one of these t-shirts, even if they are
a fan of the band, and surely if a person needed a shirt this big, they wouldn’t
want it to be bright orange? As I predicted, I look like I am wearing a tent,
but I’m not finished yet. If there’s one thing I learned during my short stint
at Brownies (I was way too edgy to cook, sew and collect crap that I found on
the floor in the park) it’s that you should always carry safety pins in your
bag. Pulling all the extra fabric from both sides, I pin them together in line
with the small of my back. My huge orange t-shirt now looks a bit more like a
dress. A bright orange, TFTR branded dress that doesn’t really clash too much
with my boots. To be honest, my gold accessories set it off quite nicely. I
don’t look too shocking and I’m definitely warmer.
Stepping
off the bus I see Mark, Luke and Eddie smoking, and they look very amused by my
outfit - probably because it’s free advertising for them.
‘Wilde,
what did you do to it?’ Luke asks, astonished. ‘It actually suits you!’
‘That’s
the thing with our Nicole, she can make anything look amazing, can’t you babe?’
Eddie says, taking a final drag on his cigarette and flicking it across the car
park.
‘You’re
too kind, boys,’ I say, embarrassed but flattered to hear Eddie refer to me as
theirs.
I
look over at Mark who is leaning on the bus. He hasn’t spoken to me today and I
don’t think he’s going to either.
‘We’d
better get a move on,’ Eddie says, jumping on aboard way too energetically for
someone who drank so much last night. ‘Luke, get that lazy bastard Ben up, will
you.’
‘I’m
on it!’ he replies, giving Eddie a playful smack on the bum as he follows him
up the stairs.
It’s
just me and Mark now. Awkward. If he’s not going to say anything then I guess
I’d better try.
‘How
are you today?’ I ask with a smile.
‘Fine,
cheers,’ he replies without even looking up.
‘Good,’
I say undefeated. ‘Not many dates left now, I bet you’ll miss it when it’s
over.’
‘Yep,
probably.’
This
is impossible. I was hoping that last night he was either too drunk to
remember, or at least too drunk to care, but I’m guessing he isn’t my biggest
fan right now.
‘I’ll
see you on the bus, yeah?’ I ask, but I don’t expect him to reply, and he
doesn’t. Then, the second my foot touches the first step, he calls after me.
‘I
hear you’re sharing a
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