out on the heels of a sob and then a torrent of tears fell down her face, her shoulders shaking, her head down to hide the complete takeover of her sorrow.
William hugged her then as she'd longed to be hugged. His strong, rich sense was around her, his warm, capable arms were an instant comfort, a balm to her soul. He bent down to kiss her on the forehead, so tentatively, so gently that it seemed that he thought she was made of spun glass, that she would break if he handled her with more than the most tender of treatment.
They stood that way in the center of the apartment for a long time. William gently rocked her and murmured sweet nonsense things. He was putting her back together with his embrace. When the moment passed, Abby pulled away just slightly. She didn't want to lose William's selfless warmth. He loosened his hold just a little so they could look each other in the eyes.
“I'm sorry,” she said, trying to dry her face of tears. “I didn't mean to become such a mess. I just wanted to tell you everything.”
“You're not a mess,” William chided, giving her that winning smile. “You wanted to be truthful with me. That means a lot.”
He broke their embrace completely to go to his desk and give her a handful of tissues from the box there. She took them with a sheepish thank you and tried to compose herself.
“I must be red and puffy and a horror to look at,” she said, dabbing her eyes.
“You're beautiful,” William said so sweetly that she really believed it.
“I haven't cried like that in... forever,” Abby admitted. “And certainly not in front of anyone. Not even at Angelica’s funeral. I couldn't, not with everyone looking at me. And for years afterward everyone in South Meadow would see me and look so apologetic. Every person I saw reminded me of my loss and I reminded them of a dead girl.
“I got tired of people being sorry on my behalf. I got tired of people promising to pray for me,” Abby sighed. She took William's hands the way he always took hers when he wanted to convince her of something. “For a while I didn't go to church. I know everyone had the best of intentions for me and truly cared about me and Angelica and the rest of our family. But there was always some kindly lady who wanted to make dinner for us or someone who wanted to tell me they understood. They were being kind but at that time I didn't feel that I deserved kindness. Not really. So I didn't go. Eventually I assimilated back into the church and the community, mostly because I knew that's what my parents wanted.”
Abby paused and William looked on encouragingly.
“I came here to put all of what happened behind me. I wanted to start a new life. And you're right, I've been too isolated. I need to get out and meet people who aren't just directors or angry customers at the diner. It'll be good for me.”
William smiled like a child who'd just gotten all their Christmas presents early.
“So you'll come with me to the BBQ?”
Abby nodded.
“I'll come. I am kind of curious to meet these friends of yours,” she teased.
Chapter Eight
Getting off of work for July 4 th had not been as easy as Abby anticipated it would be. When she worked at restaurants in South Meadow it had always proved a slow night of mediocre tips. It was a holiday for picnics and parties and BBQs and few people chose to take their business to restaurants. But in New York City her boss Aaron told her it was a whole different affair.
“Tons of tourists come in for the big fireworks show,” he said, dollar
William hugged her then as she'd longed to be hugged. His strong, rich sense was around her, his warm, capable arms were an instant comfort, a balm to her soul. He bent down to kiss her on the forehead, so tentatively, so gently that it seemed that he thought she was made of spun glass, that she would break if he handled her with more than the most tender of treatment.
They stood that way in the center of the apartment for a long time. William gently rocked her and murmured sweet nonsense things. He was putting her back together with his embrace. When the moment passed, Abby pulled away just slightly. She didn't want to lose William's selfless warmth. He loosened his hold just a little so they could look each other in the eyes.
“I'm sorry,” she said, trying to dry her face of tears. “I didn't mean to become such a mess. I just wanted to tell you everything.”
“You're not a mess,” William chided, giving her that winning smile. “You wanted to be truthful with me. That means a lot.”
He broke their embrace completely to go to his desk and give her a handful of tissues from the box there. She took them with a sheepish thank you and tried to compose herself.
“I must be red and puffy and a horror to look at,” she said, dabbing her eyes.
“You're beautiful,” William said so sweetly that she really believed it.
“I haven't cried like that in... forever,” Abby admitted. “And certainly not in front of anyone. Not even at Angelica’s funeral. I couldn't, not with everyone looking at me. And for years afterward everyone in South Meadow would see me and look so apologetic. Every person I saw reminded me of my loss and I reminded them of a dead girl.
“I got tired of people being sorry on my behalf. I got tired of people promising to pray for me,” Abby sighed. She took William's hands the way he always took hers when he wanted to convince her of something. “For a while I didn't go to church. I know everyone had the best of intentions for me and truly cared about me and Angelica and the rest of our family. But there was always some kindly lady who wanted to make dinner for us or someone who wanted to tell me they understood. They were being kind but at that time I didn't feel that I deserved kindness. Not really. So I didn't go. Eventually I assimilated back into the church and the community, mostly because I knew that's what my parents wanted.”
Abby paused and William looked on encouragingly.
“I came here to put all of what happened behind me. I wanted to start a new life. And you're right, I've been too isolated. I need to get out and meet people who aren't just directors or angry customers at the diner. It'll be good for me.”
William smiled like a child who'd just gotten all their Christmas presents early.
“So you'll come with me to the BBQ?”
Abby nodded.
“I'll come. I am kind of curious to meet these friends of yours,” she teased.
Chapter Eight
Getting off of work for July 4 th had not been as easy as Abby anticipated it would be. When she worked at restaurants in South Meadow it had always proved a slow night of mediocre tips. It was a holiday for picnics and parties and BBQs and few people chose to take their business to restaurants. But in New York City her boss Aaron told her it was a whole different affair.
“Tons of tourists come in for the big fireworks show,” he said, dollar
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