town and I’m against a leash law.’
‘And look at your people!’ Biff said, pointing to Dr and Mrs Trifle who were running back and forth at the front of the hall. ‘They’re out of control.’
‘They are not! Dr Trifle! Mrs Trifle! Stop!’ Selby said, pointing to the Trifles. The two of them stopped and looked up at Selby. ‘Now sit,’ Selby added quietly. And the Trifles sat. ‘You see?’ he said. ‘You don’t need a leash to control a person. I mean do we love our … our people? Of course we do. Do we want to keep them in prison? No, of course we don’t.’
Selby let his voice rise and fall as he spoke. He could feel the excitement of having everyone’s attention. On and on he spoke about freedom, about the rights of the person, about not picking up poo.
‘So to conclude,’ he said. ‘Do we want our people to enjoy the freedom that we have? Or do we want them to be our slaves? I rest my case.’
There was a roar of applause from everyone except the Chief of Police.
‘Now if any of you are still silly enough to want this leash law,’ Selby said. ‘Go ahead, raise your hand — I mean paw.’
A few paws went up slowly but then came down. Everyone’s except Biff’s.
‘The law is defeated,’ Selby said. ‘Meeting dismissed.’
‘That was a great speech,’ Hamish said later. ‘Now what was it you wanted to talk to me about?’
‘I’m not sure how to say this,’ Selby said. ‘But this morning I was a pet.’
‘A
pet?
You’re a dog not a pet. The Trifles are your pets. They’re human beings.’
‘But I’m pretty sure it used to be the other way around,’ Selby said.
‘Listen, Selby, I know you’ve been under a lot of pressure,’ Hamish said, ‘but now you’ve completely flipped.’
Selby drove the Trifles home. He reached for the Dry-Mouth Dog Biscuits but then stopped.
‘You don’t want this rubbish,’ he said to the Trifles. ‘Let’s get you some yummy food. I’m in charge now. I can do anything I want.’
Selby rang The Spicy Onion Restaurant and ordered peanut prawns.
‘Shall we put this on your account, Mr Mayor?’ the voice on the other end of the phone said.
‘On my account? Yes. And send them over as soon as possible,’ Selby said. ‘I’m starving.’
Within minutes the delivery-dog fromThe Spicy Onion Restaurant was there with the prawns.
‘Go for your lives,’ Selby said, filling the Trifles’ bowl.
Dr and Mrs Trifle bent down and sniffed the prawns and then looked up at Selby.
‘Don’t tell me you don’t like them,’ Selby said. ‘Come on, they’re delicious. At least lick one.’
But it was no use. Selby tipped the prawns out and filled the bowl with Dry-Mouth Dog Biscuits.
‘So you like those awful things,’ he said. ‘Well, I guess I get to eat all the prawns.’
Selby let the Trifles out and then turned on the TV to see
Roxanna the Sorcerer.
‘Now I can just take it easy,’ he thought. ‘I don’t have to worry about getting sprung or anything. I don’t know how it happened but I love it! I’m the boss! I’m the mayor of Bogusville! I can do anything I want! I’m the king!’
The End
Author’s note: Actually it isn’t really the end.
The story continues in the next chapter.
Paw note: This is confusing because my real name isn’t ‘Selby'. The person who rang me called me by my real name but Duncan doesn’t know my real name so he had to put ‘Selby’ because that’s the name I use when I ring him. (Maybe that’s more confusing.)
S
SELBY UNFLIPS
(
Continued from the previous chapter
)
The TV program had just started when Selby heard a terrible row in the front yard. He opened the door to see Aunt Jetty snapping and growling at Dr and Mrs Trifle. Nearby were Willy and Billy.
‘Stop it, you!’ Selby yelled. ‘Get out of it! Hey! Shoo!’
Aunt Jetty bared her teeth and growled. Willy and Billy did the same.
‘Steady on,’ Selby said, as he backed towards the door. ‘Don’t you dare bite
‘And look at your people!’ Biff said, pointing to Dr and Mrs Trifle who were running back and forth at the front of the hall. ‘They’re out of control.’
‘They are not! Dr Trifle! Mrs Trifle! Stop!’ Selby said, pointing to the Trifles. The two of them stopped and looked up at Selby. ‘Now sit,’ Selby added quietly. And the Trifles sat. ‘You see?’ he said. ‘You don’t need a leash to control a person. I mean do we love our … our people? Of course we do. Do we want to keep them in prison? No, of course we don’t.’
Selby let his voice rise and fall as he spoke. He could feel the excitement of having everyone’s attention. On and on he spoke about freedom, about the rights of the person, about not picking up poo.
‘So to conclude,’ he said. ‘Do we want our people to enjoy the freedom that we have? Or do we want them to be our slaves? I rest my case.’
There was a roar of applause from everyone except the Chief of Police.
‘Now if any of you are still silly enough to want this leash law,’ Selby said. ‘Go ahead, raise your hand — I mean paw.’
A few paws went up slowly but then came down. Everyone’s except Biff’s.
‘The law is defeated,’ Selby said. ‘Meeting dismissed.’
‘That was a great speech,’ Hamish said later. ‘Now what was it you wanted to talk to me about?’
‘I’m not sure how to say this,’ Selby said. ‘But this morning I was a pet.’
‘A
pet?
You’re a dog not a pet. The Trifles are your pets. They’re human beings.’
‘But I’m pretty sure it used to be the other way around,’ Selby said.
‘Listen, Selby, I know you’ve been under a lot of pressure,’ Hamish said, ‘but now you’ve completely flipped.’
Selby drove the Trifles home. He reached for the Dry-Mouth Dog Biscuits but then stopped.
‘You don’t want this rubbish,’ he said to the Trifles. ‘Let’s get you some yummy food. I’m in charge now. I can do anything I want.’
Selby rang The Spicy Onion Restaurant and ordered peanut prawns.
‘Shall we put this on your account, Mr Mayor?’ the voice on the other end of the phone said.
‘On my account? Yes. And send them over as soon as possible,’ Selby said. ‘I’m starving.’
Within minutes the delivery-dog fromThe Spicy Onion Restaurant was there with the prawns.
‘Go for your lives,’ Selby said, filling the Trifles’ bowl.
Dr and Mrs Trifle bent down and sniffed the prawns and then looked up at Selby.
‘Don’t tell me you don’t like them,’ Selby said. ‘Come on, they’re delicious. At least lick one.’
But it was no use. Selby tipped the prawns out and filled the bowl with Dry-Mouth Dog Biscuits.
‘So you like those awful things,’ he said. ‘Well, I guess I get to eat all the prawns.’
Selby let the Trifles out and then turned on the TV to see
Roxanna the Sorcerer.
‘Now I can just take it easy,’ he thought. ‘I don’t have to worry about getting sprung or anything. I don’t know how it happened but I love it! I’m the boss! I’m the mayor of Bogusville! I can do anything I want! I’m the king!’
The End
Author’s note: Actually it isn’t really the end.
The story continues in the next chapter.
Paw note: This is confusing because my real name isn’t ‘Selby'. The person who rang me called me by my real name but Duncan doesn’t know my real name so he had to put ‘Selby’ because that’s the name I use when I ring him. (Maybe that’s more confusing.)
S
SELBY UNFLIPS
(
Continued from the previous chapter
)
The TV program had just started when Selby heard a terrible row in the front yard. He opened the door to see Aunt Jetty snapping and growling at Dr and Mrs Trifle. Nearby were Willy and Billy.
‘Stop it, you!’ Selby yelled. ‘Get out of it! Hey! Shoo!’
Aunt Jetty bared her teeth and growled. Willy and Billy did the same.
‘Steady on,’ Selby said, as he backed towards the door. ‘Don’t you dare bite
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