getting further away. I am alone, which is good because I need to think. The street is dark and I scamper up it, past the newsagents, Tesco Express, and taking a deep breath, over the bridge. There are no street lights for about a hundred yards and I breathe the darkness, exhilarating in being alone, scaring myself.
Trying not to jump to conclusions, because if I do my head might explode. Actually I don’t need to try to scare myself. The police said Rose was killed at around 2am, and as I check my watch I realise it’s five to. I wonder if she haunts this place, and more, I wonder for the millionth time what the hell she was doing walking on The Road at this time. Because she wasn’t trying to kill herself. She was too sussed to freak out over some imagined love triangle. The Rose I knew would deal with it and move on.
My phone flashes with a message:
‘its ok – know u r still upset ova rose. Still love u!’
Lovely Leo, my rock. He still refuses to decide what to do with his life, but he took loads of A Levels just after Christmas and already got top marks for pure maths, computer science, and psychology. That’s what happens when you’re clever, you take your exams early and get the whole summer off. He’s even been talking about applying to whatever uni I go to. But, bless him, he’s worse than I am when it comes to making a decision. He still can’t decide whether to go down the finance route or do a science degree. Guess when you’re that smart you can have too many choices.
The Road is silent far below and I almost don’t see the shadowy figure, detach itself from the blackness, to thump up behind me. I spin and scream.
“Matt! Can you stop sneaking up on me? That’s like twice in a week, I’m gonna think you’re a stalker or something!” I gasp in relief, and a tiny bit thrilled to see him again so soon. A tiny bit wary as well, after what Leo said. Plus half my mind is still chewing over my weird conversation with Ashley.
He smiles, “I didn’t realise you guys had left. Are you heading home?”
“Yeah, Ashley went on to Ratz.” I feel suddenly shy again. Ask him about Anita, I tell myself firmly, but….he looks so gorgeous, silhouetted against the summer night, dark hair and eyes highlighting his slightly square face, pale blue shirt hanging loose over baggy jeans. I can’t bring myself to spoil the moment. And she’s not here is she? He followed me!
I am sweating, “Aren’t you hot in jeans?” Way to go Caz, how to make a sophisticated comment. I sound like my mum; again! I must be the oldest eighteen year old I know. Dredging in the murky depths of my brain for some witty, sophisticated conversation I come up with…nothing.
He doesn’t seem to care though, “Not really. Come on, I’ll walk you back.”
“You don’t need to…” We are meandering along, drifting off the path onto the top of the embankment, surrounded by a froth of white and yellow flowers. It is very quiet, just a hum from The Road, but even that fails to unsettle me. My heart is thundering, and I am praying the hand he just took is not sweaty. His palms are cool and dry.
“It’s 2:30am, I need to get back!” I push myself reluctantly from his embrace, heart thundering, as he combs my hair back with gentle fingertips. My skin buzzes from his touch, and we link hands like two kids walking back from a picnic. But not as innocent.
It’s only when he heads back into the night that I remember he was coming up from the embankment again, and did I imagine it, or was there the rumble and crash of an artic. pulling away from the lay-by. I file it away for future reference. Along with all the other stuff cluttering the back of my mind.
When I finally slide into my bed I spend maybe a half hour remembering, and Rose, from her lofty position on my wall gives me the thumbs up. I can’t even work up the energy to be indignant, to ask her about what Ashley told me. For the
Trying not to jump to conclusions, because if I do my head might explode. Actually I don’t need to try to scare myself. The police said Rose was killed at around 2am, and as I check my watch I realise it’s five to. I wonder if she haunts this place, and more, I wonder for the millionth time what the hell she was doing walking on The Road at this time. Because she wasn’t trying to kill herself. She was too sussed to freak out over some imagined love triangle. The Rose I knew would deal with it and move on.
My phone flashes with a message:
‘its ok – know u r still upset ova rose. Still love u!’
Lovely Leo, my rock. He still refuses to decide what to do with his life, but he took loads of A Levels just after Christmas and already got top marks for pure maths, computer science, and psychology. That’s what happens when you’re clever, you take your exams early and get the whole summer off. He’s even been talking about applying to whatever uni I go to. But, bless him, he’s worse than I am when it comes to making a decision. He still can’t decide whether to go down the finance route or do a science degree. Guess when you’re that smart you can have too many choices.
The Road is silent far below and I almost don’t see the shadowy figure, detach itself from the blackness, to thump up behind me. I spin and scream.
“Matt! Can you stop sneaking up on me? That’s like twice in a week, I’m gonna think you’re a stalker or something!” I gasp in relief, and a tiny bit thrilled to see him again so soon. A tiny bit wary as well, after what Leo said. Plus half my mind is still chewing over my weird conversation with Ashley.
He smiles, “I didn’t realise you guys had left. Are you heading home?”
“Yeah, Ashley went on to Ratz.” I feel suddenly shy again. Ask him about Anita, I tell myself firmly, but….he looks so gorgeous, silhouetted against the summer night, dark hair and eyes highlighting his slightly square face, pale blue shirt hanging loose over baggy jeans. I can’t bring myself to spoil the moment. And she’s not here is she? He followed me!
I am sweating, “Aren’t you hot in jeans?” Way to go Caz, how to make a sophisticated comment. I sound like my mum; again! I must be the oldest eighteen year old I know. Dredging in the murky depths of my brain for some witty, sophisticated conversation I come up with…nothing.
He doesn’t seem to care though, “Not really. Come on, I’ll walk you back.”
“You don’t need to…” We are meandering along, drifting off the path onto the top of the embankment, surrounded by a froth of white and yellow flowers. It is very quiet, just a hum from The Road, but even that fails to unsettle me. My heart is thundering, and I am praying the hand he just took is not sweaty. His palms are cool and dry.
“It’s 2:30am, I need to get back!” I push myself reluctantly from his embrace, heart thundering, as he combs my hair back with gentle fingertips. My skin buzzes from his touch, and we link hands like two kids walking back from a picnic. But not as innocent.
It’s only when he heads back into the night that I remember he was coming up from the embankment again, and did I imagine it, or was there the rumble and crash of an artic. pulling away from the lay-by. I file it away for future reference. Along with all the other stuff cluttering the back of my mind.
When I finally slide into my bed I spend maybe a half hour remembering, and Rose, from her lofty position on my wall gives me the thumbs up. I can’t even work up the energy to be indignant, to ask her about what Ashley told me. For the
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