The smell of leather cleaner should have made her nervous, it always had before, but this time, it reminded her of the good days, when things had been easier, calmer. Derek worked with a quiet focus, and his hands were just the right balance of firm and gentle. Of course, that was no surprise.
“Walt’s staying,” he said, after a while.
“How’s his son?”
“Don’t know yet. Doctors still say it’s too close to call. But he says whichever way it goes, he’s staying. Says he’s had enough of the road. He says he’s going to open up a motorcycle repair shop.” There was a long pause, and she made herself wait through it. He spent a long time buffing out a particularly stubborn spot on her jacket--she couldn’t see anything wrong with it, but he was paying it a ferocious amount of attention--and then he took a breath so deep that it seemed to suck the air out of the room. “I’m not saying I’ll stay for you. I don’t think you’d trust that even if I said it. And I don’t know--a lot happened that put me on the road in the first place. But walking up those stairs, thinking you might have been hurt…” He turned his face up to her, and there were tears tracing down his cheeks. “I just want to know if you think it’s worth trying. Trying, and seeing what happens.”
She looked at Cole, at the beautiful boy she was doing a perfectly fine job of raising on her own. She looked at her life, the solid life she’d created, the life in which absolutely nothing was missing. And she knew in her heart that she could make a space for him. That it was, in fact, worth a try.
She leaned down and pushed the jacket out of his hands. She pressed her lips to his almost delicately, and let him read her agreement in her tongue, flitting lightly against his lower lip before she pulled away.
***
That night, she put Cole to bed in his room while Derek sat on the couch. As she walked back out to the living room, he opened his arms to her, and she snuggled into them easily. His hand stroked down her back, relaxing her for the first time since Ryan had burst through the door in the morning, letting the clenched aches and pains begin to subside. He stroked her hair, and she sighed into him, arching her back just a bit.
Which was why she noticed him shifting uncomfortably. She looked up at him from where she rested on his shoulder, and saw the flush in his ears. Looked down, and saw the bulge in his jeans. “Really?” she asked, chuckling.
“The fact that it was an awful morning doesn’t make me less of a man,” he leaned over and kissed her, less than gently, “or you any less gorgeous.”
She bit her lip for a moment before swinging into his lap, straddling him. His inhale was sharp and focused, and he didn’t seem to be sure where to put his hands. “Glad you noticed,” she said. “I was worried.”
He laughed, and then glanced towards Cole’s room. “You don’t have to--I get it. If it’s too much. I don’t know if I’ll ever stop wanting you, so at some point, you’re going to have to turn me down, if only so that you can get some sleep.”
Danni stretched, showing off her breasts. “I’ve been a single mother for five years. I can get by on shockingly little sleep.”
Afterwards, she wasn’t sure if it was shoving her boobs in his face, or grinding her hips against him, that did it. Either way, his face was pressed against her, his mouth searching for her nipples through the fabric of her bra and her shirt, his hands pulling her hips tight against him. She ran her hands down his back, loving the attention, loving the sensation of being alive after so much chaos.
“Bedroom,” she murmured.
“You don’t have to--” Everything was in his eyes. Everything. That he wanted this, that he wanted her, that he was vulnerable, that he was strong, that he’d hold her every step of the way, even if she changed her mind right now, but that
“Walt’s staying,” he said, after a while.
“How’s his son?”
“Don’t know yet. Doctors still say it’s too close to call. But he says whichever way it goes, he’s staying. Says he’s had enough of the road. He says he’s going to open up a motorcycle repair shop.” There was a long pause, and she made herself wait through it. He spent a long time buffing out a particularly stubborn spot on her jacket--she couldn’t see anything wrong with it, but he was paying it a ferocious amount of attention--and then he took a breath so deep that it seemed to suck the air out of the room. “I’m not saying I’ll stay for you. I don’t think you’d trust that even if I said it. And I don’t know--a lot happened that put me on the road in the first place. But walking up those stairs, thinking you might have been hurt…” He turned his face up to her, and there were tears tracing down his cheeks. “I just want to know if you think it’s worth trying. Trying, and seeing what happens.”
She looked at Cole, at the beautiful boy she was doing a perfectly fine job of raising on her own. She looked at her life, the solid life she’d created, the life in which absolutely nothing was missing. And she knew in her heart that she could make a space for him. That it was, in fact, worth a try.
She leaned down and pushed the jacket out of his hands. She pressed her lips to his almost delicately, and let him read her agreement in her tongue, flitting lightly against his lower lip before she pulled away.
***
That night, she put Cole to bed in his room while Derek sat on the couch. As she walked back out to the living room, he opened his arms to her, and she snuggled into them easily. His hand stroked down her back, relaxing her for the first time since Ryan had burst through the door in the morning, letting the clenched aches and pains begin to subside. He stroked her hair, and she sighed into him, arching her back just a bit.
Which was why she noticed him shifting uncomfortably. She looked up at him from where she rested on his shoulder, and saw the flush in his ears. Looked down, and saw the bulge in his jeans. “Really?” she asked, chuckling.
“The fact that it was an awful morning doesn’t make me less of a man,” he leaned over and kissed her, less than gently, “or you any less gorgeous.”
She bit her lip for a moment before swinging into his lap, straddling him. His inhale was sharp and focused, and he didn’t seem to be sure where to put his hands. “Glad you noticed,” she said. “I was worried.”
He laughed, and then glanced towards Cole’s room. “You don’t have to--I get it. If it’s too much. I don’t know if I’ll ever stop wanting you, so at some point, you’re going to have to turn me down, if only so that you can get some sleep.”
Danni stretched, showing off her breasts. “I’ve been a single mother for five years. I can get by on shockingly little sleep.”
Afterwards, she wasn’t sure if it was shoving her boobs in his face, or grinding her hips against him, that did it. Either way, his face was pressed against her, his mouth searching for her nipples through the fabric of her bra and her shirt, his hands pulling her hips tight against him. She ran her hands down his back, loving the attention, loving the sensation of being alive after so much chaos.
“Bedroom,” she murmured.
“You don’t have to--” Everything was in his eyes. Everything. That he wanted this, that he wanted her, that he was vulnerable, that he was strong, that he’d hold her every step of the way, even if she changed her mind right now, but that
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