to move away from the board and I signed up for the hockey trials. They didn’t even notice I was there which was a blessing as they also didn’t comment on the fact I’d signed up for hockey!
Eighteen
I am in the hockey trials.
I know that it’s not much to be excited about as I’m sure that everyone on that list has been accepted for the trials, but I’m still excited that there’s something to break up the monotony of school. I’m doing okay, getting my work done and not getting any hassle, but there has to be more to school life than this. I know that there is more to school life than this; I just need to figure out how to get it.
I took Reggie out into the garden for some hockey practice last night. He was no help at all as he kept running off with the ball and trying to bite the stick! It kept Mum and me entertained though and Mum even grabbed my old stick and tried to tackle me. Apparently she was quite a good player when she was at school, hmmm…I’m not so sure! Still, I feel like I can at least remember how to hit the ball; I just know that I’m nowhere near as fit as I used to be. With Reggie’s help I’ll be amazing at tackling by next week. Keeping the ball away from his mouth is great training.
I had to go back to the dreaded board to find out if I’d been picked for the trials or not. The gaggle of girls were there again, but this time they were much quieter. They’re not quite so brave in sharing their opinions when they are surrounded by all the hockey players that they were happily badmouthing the other day! That made me smile, I was really intimidated by them before and now I’m not sure what I was scared of. There were so many people there all checking whether or not they had been given a spot in the trials for their chosen sport. Everyone just wanted to see if their name was on that board.
There was one strange moment. I heard my name mentioned and my blood ran cold. I thought that someone was talking about me and I strained my ears to hear more. It was only someoneasking who I was! There were a couple of girls at the front looking at the hockey list and they didn’t recognise my name. All they said was,
Random girl A: ‘Who’s Dani Moore, I don’t know anyone called Dani Moore?’
Random girl B: ‘No idea…Maybe she’s one of the new girls that started this year?
Random girl A: ‘Oh yeah, could be. I wonder if she’s any good!
That was it. I suppose I could have just gone up to them and said ‘hi’ and told them I was Dani. That would probably have been easier than panicking and straining to listen. It was a positive and pain free mention of my name. What a relief.
Trials aren’t until next week so I have some more time to practise the basic skills in the garden. It’s not ideal training ground, but it’s better than nothing. Reggie had better tackling skills than Mum, but I won’t mention that to her! When I think about the trials I feel quite scared; my stomach starts its gymnastics routine, but I’m not completely sure what I’m scared of. I have a cycle of questions going around my head: What if I don’t make the team? What if I do make the team? What if I’m rubbish at hockey here? What if I fall flat on my face? I have a feeling that if I do fall flat on my face the girls here won’t find it quite as funny as my old friends did. What if the gaggle of girls are all trying out for hockey despite what they said? There are so many things that scare me about this. It’s just hockey! When I try and be logical I know that it’s just a game of hockey. I have all the kit I need, I know the rules, have played lots of times before and more often than not, I enjoyed it. I have to tell myself that approximately 500 times a day.
I’ve certainly survived worse than a game of hockey so really, there’s nothing to worry about. Really, there’s not. If only I could be this logical all of the time. I seem to have days where I feel invincible and then days where I
Eighteen
I am in the hockey trials.
I know that it’s not much to be excited about as I’m sure that everyone on that list has been accepted for the trials, but I’m still excited that there’s something to break up the monotony of school. I’m doing okay, getting my work done and not getting any hassle, but there has to be more to school life than this. I know that there is more to school life than this; I just need to figure out how to get it.
I took Reggie out into the garden for some hockey practice last night. He was no help at all as he kept running off with the ball and trying to bite the stick! It kept Mum and me entertained though and Mum even grabbed my old stick and tried to tackle me. Apparently she was quite a good player when she was at school, hmmm…I’m not so sure! Still, I feel like I can at least remember how to hit the ball; I just know that I’m nowhere near as fit as I used to be. With Reggie’s help I’ll be amazing at tackling by next week. Keeping the ball away from his mouth is great training.
I had to go back to the dreaded board to find out if I’d been picked for the trials or not. The gaggle of girls were there again, but this time they were much quieter. They’re not quite so brave in sharing their opinions when they are surrounded by all the hockey players that they were happily badmouthing the other day! That made me smile, I was really intimidated by them before and now I’m not sure what I was scared of. There were so many people there all checking whether or not they had been given a spot in the trials for their chosen sport. Everyone just wanted to see if their name was on that board.
There was one strange moment. I heard my name mentioned and my blood ran cold. I thought that someone was talking about me and I strained my ears to hear more. It was only someoneasking who I was! There were a couple of girls at the front looking at the hockey list and they didn’t recognise my name. All they said was,
Random girl A: ‘Who’s Dani Moore, I don’t know anyone called Dani Moore?’
Random girl B: ‘No idea…Maybe she’s one of the new girls that started this year?
Random girl A: ‘Oh yeah, could be. I wonder if she’s any good!
That was it. I suppose I could have just gone up to them and said ‘hi’ and told them I was Dani. That would probably have been easier than panicking and straining to listen. It was a positive and pain free mention of my name. What a relief.
Trials aren’t until next week so I have some more time to practise the basic skills in the garden. It’s not ideal training ground, but it’s better than nothing. Reggie had better tackling skills than Mum, but I won’t mention that to her! When I think about the trials I feel quite scared; my stomach starts its gymnastics routine, but I’m not completely sure what I’m scared of. I have a cycle of questions going around my head: What if I don’t make the team? What if I do make the team? What if I’m rubbish at hockey here? What if I fall flat on my face? I have a feeling that if I do fall flat on my face the girls here won’t find it quite as funny as my old friends did. What if the gaggle of girls are all trying out for hockey despite what they said? There are so many things that scare me about this. It’s just hockey! When I try and be logical I know that it’s just a game of hockey. I have all the kit I need, I know the rules, have played lots of times before and more often than not, I enjoyed it. I have to tell myself that approximately 500 times a day.
I’ve certainly survived worse than a game of hockey so really, there’s nothing to worry about. Really, there’s not. If only I could be this logical all of the time. I seem to have days where I feel invincible and then days where I
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