Red Meat Cures Cancer

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Book: Red Meat Cures Cancer by Starbuck O'Dwyer Read Free Book Online
Authors: Starbuck O'Dwyer
Tags: Fiction
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asked, genuinely curious about the answer.
    “No, no. Not anymore. I’m still paying off my Super Bowl bets on za Bills.”
    “My condolences.”
    “So what you say? How ’bout WNBA? Two dimes on New York Liberty? Rebecca Lobo? Utah Starzz?”
    “Two thousand dollars? Not today, Pappy. I don’t like the way the Starzz are playing. I’m more of a Detroit Shock fan. Maybe next Wednesday.”
    “Minnesota Lynx vairsis Miami Sol?”
    Although I’d never actually placed a bet with Pappy, I always tried to appease him. He seemed to enjoy taking bets more than running a restaurant. Summer was a bit slow for him as well. He didn’t take bets on baseball, and it was tough trying to push the teaser for a professional lacrosse game between the Rochester Rattlers and the Toronto Rock. Finally, he left me and Cal alone. There was no need to take our orders since we always had the same thing.
    “You don’t look well, Sky.”
    “It’s good to see you, too.”
    “I don’t mean to insult you. I just want to make sure you’re all right.”
    “We’re getting ready to launch this new campaign and I’m under a little pressure. We’ve also got these anti–red meat fanatics on our asses again. Same old shit. How about you? How are things?”
    “Sky, the industry has never been better.”
    Whenever Cal talked about pornography he called it “the industry,” mostly to make himself feel better, I think.
    “We’re growing like mad. I’m projecting a two hundred and fifty-eight percent increase in revenue this year. I can’t get enough girls to work the phone lines. Our Internet revenue is soaring, and our sexual-products catalog is producing unlike ever before.”
    Cal shoved a piece of bread in his mouth and continued talking.
    “And get this. We’re in the process of building an actual ranch out in the Nevada desert. You’ll be able to go out there and fuck anything you want for a hundred bucks. We’re entering a golden age of adult entertainment. America has found its secret little outlet.”
    “I’m happy for you. And for America.”
    “Sky, it’s time for Tailburger to take advantage of this trend.”
    “What do you mean?”
    “You know what I mean. The industry has gone mainstream. It’s getting more and more acceptable to be a part of it. Tailburger can be at the front end of it.”
    “I can’t do that.”
    “Sure you can. Think of the product exposure. We start with some space on our Internet site and go from there.”
    At Cal’s site, www.lustranch.com , a person could find something to satisfy any fetish. Guy on gal, guy on guy, guy on gecko. You name it, they had it. Although Tailburger catered to the fringe, there was a line I worried about crossing.
    “Cal, as tempting as that sounds, I’m not in a position to make that happen.”
    “Of course you are. You’re just afraid to pull the trigger.”
    “Maybe you’re right, but I’m not convinced I
want
to pull the trigger. I mean, Tailburger is still an American institution with a reputation.”
    “As what? An also-ran in the burger business, selling awful, overfried hockey pucks to misfits and miscreants? You guys could be so much bigger. This could take you up to the majors, Sky.”
    “Possibly.”
    “No, not possibly. Definitely. I know I’m right on this one. I see the power of this thing every day. People can’t get enough sex. They’d rather fuck than find money. This is your competitive advantage. You think McDonald’s is going to touch the industry? Of course not. They can’t. They’ve made their bed with the family-friendly vendors. Now they’ve got to sleep there.”
    “Yeah, along with ninety-two percent of the market. I really feel sorry for them.”
    Pappy arrived with two steaming plates of rigatoni. The fresh peas, prosciutto and light Parmesan sauce made it our favorite and got us to shut up for a few minutes. Cal didn’t stop for long.
    “Just think about it, Sky. That’s all I’m saying.”
    “I will.”
    “If

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