Chuckles thought he was doing.
12
Not yet, Garrett. Dean! The Dead Man did not often extend his mindtouch beyond his room. That was a courtesy he extended us. Get rid of those harridans. Commend them to your nieces. We have a commission.
“His nieces?” I hurried into his room. “You want to create monsters?” Dean had a platoon of spinster nieces, all front-runners for Miss Homely TunFaire. They drove him to despair. Which was why he had conscripted himself as a full-time member of my household. He couldn’t take it anymore. “Can you imagine that pack in pursuit of a mission from God?”
Dean has sense enough to avoid that eventuality. While we await him, I will tell you what to do. Backtrack from events at Mr. Dotes’s place. But first bring Mr. Dotes and Mr. Tharpe to see me. We will want their help.
“ ‘We’ might want it, but how are ‘we’ going to afford it? My share of what I’m getting to watch Barking Dog won’t—”
Captain Block will assume expenses. You should pay closer attention. I quoted an exorbitant fee. He was desperate enough not to quibble.
“If they’re as scared as he puts on, they could put up enough from bribe money to pay anything.”
Exactly. We have been handed an unprecedented opportunity. Where he’s concerned, money has no provenance. It’s never dirty, only the people who handle it are. I intend to pursue it with vigor.
With my vigor, he meant. “That’s the reason you’re jumping on this?” I didn’t believe it.
Let us say that I find my mind growing as flabby and slothful as you allowed your body to become. I must get into shape before it is too late. I am not yet prepared to slide into oblivion.
Oblivion. I put that away where I could find it next time he started in on the condition of my immortal soul.
What he said sounded good. I didn’t believe it. And he knew that. But he didn’t let me press. There is no time to waste. Get Mr. Tharpe and Mr. Dotes.
Mr. Tharpe didn’t want to get got. He’d gotten rid of Billie and had replaced her with a little blond who could have been her sister. The new hadn’t worn off enough for him to see that. He wanted to stay home and play.
“Anyway, it ain’t even dark out yet, Garrett.”
“You only work at night now?”
“Getting in the habit, doing these odd jobs for Licks.”
“So sunlight for me. Talk to the Dead Man. You don’t want the work, no harm done. I’ll get somebody else. Won’t be as good, but I’ll make do.” Never hurts to butter him up.
“What’s shaking?”
“A serial killer. A real psycho. His Nibs can fill you in. I don’t know why he wants you. He just started spouting orders like a fountain.”
“Okay. I’ll talk to him.” He looked at his friend. She scorched me with a lethal stare.
I said, “I got to see Morley,” and got out of there before the woman carved their initials in my trunk.
Morley’s place was sparsely populated. It had just opened. His customers are like the stars, seldom seen before dark. Those in there then were early bats trying to get a jump on their competition.
Nobody got excited when I walked in. Nobody knew me. The guy behind the counter was new. He was a skinny little half-elf like Morley, handsome as hell but barely old enough to think about taking advantage of that. He was trying to grow a mustache.
It was catching. “I need to see Morley,” I told him. “Name’s Garrett. Tell him it is business and there’s a shitpot in it.”
The kid looked me straight in the eye. “Morley? Who the hell is Morley? I don’t know any Morley.”
One of those. “Kid, I’ll take into account the fact that you’re new. I’ll take into account the fact that you’re young and dumb, and figure you got to be a wiseass. When I’m done accounting, I just might pull you over the bar and pound away till Morley comes down to see about all the screaming. Get on the tube.”
The audience wasn’t much, but it did exist. The kid thought he
12
Not yet, Garrett. Dean! The Dead Man did not often extend his mindtouch beyond his room. That was a courtesy he extended us. Get rid of those harridans. Commend them to your nieces. We have a commission.
“His nieces?” I hurried into his room. “You want to create monsters?” Dean had a platoon of spinster nieces, all front-runners for Miss Homely TunFaire. They drove him to despair. Which was why he had conscripted himself as a full-time member of my household. He couldn’t take it anymore. “Can you imagine that pack in pursuit of a mission from God?”
Dean has sense enough to avoid that eventuality. While we await him, I will tell you what to do. Backtrack from events at Mr. Dotes’s place. But first bring Mr. Dotes and Mr. Tharpe to see me. We will want their help.
“ ‘We’ might want it, but how are ‘we’ going to afford it? My share of what I’m getting to watch Barking Dog won’t—”
Captain Block will assume expenses. You should pay closer attention. I quoted an exorbitant fee. He was desperate enough not to quibble.
“If they’re as scared as he puts on, they could put up enough from bribe money to pay anything.”
Exactly. We have been handed an unprecedented opportunity. Where he’s concerned, money has no provenance. It’s never dirty, only the people who handle it are. I intend to pursue it with vigor.
With my vigor, he meant. “That’s the reason you’re jumping on this?” I didn’t believe it.
Let us say that I find my mind growing as flabby and slothful as you allowed your body to become. I must get into shape before it is too late. I am not yet prepared to slide into oblivion.
Oblivion. I put that away where I could find it next time he started in on the condition of my immortal soul.
What he said sounded good. I didn’t believe it. And he knew that. But he didn’t let me press. There is no time to waste. Get Mr. Tharpe and Mr. Dotes.
Mr. Tharpe didn’t want to get got. He’d gotten rid of Billie and had replaced her with a little blond who could have been her sister. The new hadn’t worn off enough for him to see that. He wanted to stay home and play.
“Anyway, it ain’t even dark out yet, Garrett.”
“You only work at night now?”
“Getting in the habit, doing these odd jobs for Licks.”
“So sunlight for me. Talk to the Dead Man. You don’t want the work, no harm done. I’ll get somebody else. Won’t be as good, but I’ll make do.” Never hurts to butter him up.
“What’s shaking?”
“A serial killer. A real psycho. His Nibs can fill you in. I don’t know why he wants you. He just started spouting orders like a fountain.”
“Okay. I’ll talk to him.” He looked at his friend. She scorched me with a lethal stare.
I said, “I got to see Morley,” and got out of there before the woman carved their initials in my trunk.
Morley’s place was sparsely populated. It had just opened. His customers are like the stars, seldom seen before dark. Those in there then were early bats trying to get a jump on their competition.
Nobody got excited when I walked in. Nobody knew me. The guy behind the counter was new. He was a skinny little half-elf like Morley, handsome as hell but barely old enough to think about taking advantage of that. He was trying to grow a mustache.
It was catching. “I need to see Morley,” I told him. “Name’s Garrett. Tell him it is business and there’s a shitpot in it.”
The kid looked me straight in the eye. “Morley? Who the hell is Morley? I don’t know any Morley.”
One of those. “Kid, I’ll take into account the fact that you’re new. I’ll take into account the fact that you’re young and dumb, and figure you got to be a wiseass. When I’m done accounting, I just might pull you over the bar and pound away till Morley comes down to see about all the screaming. Get on the tube.”
The audience wasn’t much, but it did exist. The kid thought he
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