Read Online One More Time by Caitlin Ricci - Free Book Online Page B
Authors: Caitlin Ricci
Tags: gay romance
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other person another time.
He shook his head. “It’s not like that. I’ll talk to you later. Bye.”
It took me longer than it should have to figure out what he meant, but after he left, I finally understood and had to sit down on my couch. I realized Trent hadn’t needed to have sex with me; I was merely convenient. He could have had sex with anyone and probably would while I sat here staring at a black TV screen. I shook my head, got up, and downed half a bottle of beer before I stopped being mad at him, and at myself. Because, really, if I was going to actually look at the situation and be honest about it, I’d nearly had sex with a man I’d known for two days. That might have been what Trent did, and I suspected it was, but I wasn’t like that. And I’d pushed him into staying and into having sex.
I wasn’t going to say no to being friends with him, but sex was most definitely off the table between us now. And yet, as I stood there leaning over my island and alternating between bites of a cookie and sips of my beer, I couldn’t stop thinking about how much I’d wanted him. It was weird and definitely not something I should have been thinking about while he probably had his dick in someone else. But the thought was there anyway.
I groaned and pulled out my phone. It was still kind of early in California, and my only close friend, Dean, would still be up. I was sure of it.
The phone rang in my hand, and I thought maybe he’d gone to bed early. Or that he and his wife were out doing something much more fun than I was. But then he picked up, and I felt instantly better at having my friend to talk to.
“Hey, Caleb.”
“Hi. How’s things there?” I asked. I wasn’t calling him to get advice on the Trent situation. We weren’t like that, and I didn’t go running to people when I had a problem. I hadn’t even told him I’d been with Paul until last year when I’d tried unsuccessfully to leave him. But it just felt good to talk to someone about nothing at all for a while.
He chuckled. “Oh, you know. Backed-up highways, all those people with their hybrids everywhere, can’t find a decent greasy burger between all the health food places.”
I smiled, remembering, and took my mostly empty beer and the box of nearly gone cookies over to the couch where I lay down and snacked. “Sounds miserable.”
“It is. How’s mountain living and no traffic, then?”
“Pretty good, actually.” When I wasn’t making ridiculous mistakes and nearly having sex with a guy I wanted but had barely even started to get to know.
“Dean, you tell him about Sam,” I heard Dean’s wife, Natalie, call to him.
“Woman, I’m getting to that!”
“Get faster!”
I laughed. “So what’s going on with Sam?”
“He got beat up at school today.” I heard the anger in Dean’s voice, and I was right there with him.
“What? How? Why?” I adored Sam, even more than my own nephews, though he was about their age. But I’d watched Sam grow up. I’d given him swimming lessons as a kid and had babysat him for years.
“Because he decided to come out in his English class.”
For a moment there I didn’t know what to say. “I thought he was going to keep that under wraps for a while.” It hadn’t been my decision, but I hadn’t been against it either. Kids were cruel more often than not, and he’d already been tormented pretty often for being black, and now they were going to beat up on him for being gay? Damn. Poor kid. I shook my head just thinking about it.
“That was what we’d talked about. But he had to write an essay about one thing that’s special about him and he wrote it and the teacher I guess liked it so much that she had him read it in front of the class. Sam says she let him decide if he wanted to or not but my guess is he was just so damn proud of his A that he decided to go for it.” Dean groaned, and I could hear the frustration in his voice. “I just wanted to keep him safe. You know?
He shook his head. “It’s not like that. I’ll talk to you later. Bye.”
It took me longer than it should have to figure out what he meant, but after he left, I finally understood and had to sit down on my couch. I realized Trent hadn’t needed to have sex with me; I was merely convenient. He could have had sex with anyone and probably would while I sat here staring at a black TV screen. I shook my head, got up, and downed half a bottle of beer before I stopped being mad at him, and at myself. Because, really, if I was going to actually look at the situation and be honest about it, I’d nearly had sex with a man I’d known for two days. That might have been what Trent did, and I suspected it was, but I wasn’t like that. And I’d pushed him into staying and into having sex.
I wasn’t going to say no to being friends with him, but sex was most definitely off the table between us now. And yet, as I stood there leaning over my island and alternating between bites of a cookie and sips of my beer, I couldn’t stop thinking about how much I’d wanted him. It was weird and definitely not something I should have been thinking about while he probably had his dick in someone else. But the thought was there anyway.
I groaned and pulled out my phone. It was still kind of early in California, and my only close friend, Dean, would still be up. I was sure of it.
The phone rang in my hand, and I thought maybe he’d gone to bed early. Or that he and his wife were out doing something much more fun than I was. But then he picked up, and I felt instantly better at having my friend to talk to.
“Hey, Caleb.”
“Hi. How’s things there?” I asked. I wasn’t calling him to get advice on the Trent situation. We weren’t like that, and I didn’t go running to people when I had a problem. I hadn’t even told him I’d been with Paul until last year when I’d tried unsuccessfully to leave him. But it just felt good to talk to someone about nothing at all for a while.
He chuckled. “Oh, you know. Backed-up highways, all those people with their hybrids everywhere, can’t find a decent greasy burger between all the health food places.”
I smiled, remembering, and took my mostly empty beer and the box of nearly gone cookies over to the couch where I lay down and snacked. “Sounds miserable.”
“It is. How’s mountain living and no traffic, then?”
“Pretty good, actually.” When I wasn’t making ridiculous mistakes and nearly having sex with a guy I wanted but had barely even started to get to know.
“Dean, you tell him about Sam,” I heard Dean’s wife, Natalie, call to him.
“Woman, I’m getting to that!”
“Get faster!”
I laughed. “So what’s going on with Sam?”
“He got beat up at school today.” I heard the anger in Dean’s voice, and I was right there with him.
“What? How? Why?” I adored Sam, even more than my own nephews, though he was about their age. But I’d watched Sam grow up. I’d given him swimming lessons as a kid and had babysat him for years.
“Because he decided to come out in his English class.”
For a moment there I didn’t know what to say. “I thought he was going to keep that under wraps for a while.” It hadn’t been my decision, but I hadn’t been against it either. Kids were cruel more often than not, and he’d already been tormented pretty often for being black, and now they were going to beat up on him for being gay? Damn. Poor kid. I shook my head just thinking about it.
“That was what we’d talked about. But he had to write an essay about one thing that’s special about him and he wrote it and the teacher I guess liked it so much that she had him read it in front of the class. Sam says she let him decide if he wanted to or not but my guess is he was just so damn proud of his A that he decided to go for it.” Dean groaned, and I could hear the frustration in his voice. “I just wanted to keep him safe. You know?
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