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centimetres. The young male capacity for sexual self-mythologising will often expand this masturbatory projectile capacity to implausible ceiling-scraping proportions, however. In Argentina, it is said, boys have for generations gathered in parks to compete to see who can project their semen further while masturbating. The evidence suggests this can hardly have been a great spectator sport.
    Pornographic films, in which an impressive (and often faked) ‘cum shot’ (otherwise known as ‘the money shot’) is
de rigueur
, increase the pressure on males to exaggerate their own projectile capacity. It might be noted that once inside the vagina, where it is designed to go, semen has a fight ahead akin to swimming in treacle. It slows down to a less than snail-like 0.0011 m.p.h., which means it spends five minutes travelling the six inches or so to the cervix.
    The amount of ejaculate expelled, typically one to two teaspoons (2½ to 5cc) per orgasm, differs between men, the volume (as well as the potency) varying with the frequency of orgasm. A man produces 125 million sperm each day, and each orgasm expels between approximately 80 million and 800 million. In the average lifetime, a man produces 14 gallons of ejaculate, enough to fill the fuel tank of the average-sized family car. The semen’s chemical composition, spermatozoa aside, is inconsistent even in individuals. About 8 per cent of the solution consists of dry solids, the majority of the sperm is a mix of more than thirty elements and compounds fromnitrogen to fructose, cholesterol and vitamins C and B 12 . Interestingly, the average ejaculatory volume contains about 60 percent of the American recommended daily intake for vitamin C.
    Just as the truth about ejaculatory distance is fogged by vanity and nonsense, ejaculatory volume is also a contentious area, undermined by mythology and bragging. The line taken by many sex websites (often those selling quack potions) is that women are impressed by voluminous ejaculations (although less so than by penis size) for psychological reasons to do with their perceptions of virility and the likelihood of their being fertilised. The 2½ to 5cc ejaculatory norm is even said to be on the low side, many women regarding anything less than a tablespoon as an unacceptably small load. The one to two teaspoon figure, it is asserted, is misleading because ejaculatory quantity is related to sexual excitement, and men are not inclined to be very excited in laboratory conditions.
    So far as the truth on both distance and volume is concerned, it unsurprisingly lies towards the bottom end of the middle range. As far as one can tell from subjective evidence, most men have smaller ejaculations than they would wish for, or imagine a partner hoping for; additionally, the true distances of schoolboy and dormitory ejaculation stories are rarely a fraction as great as stated, and tend in the vast majority of cases towards the minuscule. Even the demands of ‘the money shot’ are relatively modest in terms of projectile distance; if semen were to be ejected at a ridiculous speed, the camera would never be able to catch it from the requisite few inches’ filming distance. Fluid mechanics dictate anyway that semen, so long as it is healthy, is simply too viscous and the penis too inefficient a firing instrument to send it spurting aloft like an ornamental fountain.
    While, classically, the male orgasm has been saddled with a monolithic definition implying that it is interchangeable as both term and concept with ejaculation – the male sexual climax has probably always been experienced differently byindividual men and by those men at different times.
    Although human males have a trickier task maintaining erection than most mammals in that they depend entirely on hydraulics – most animals, including all primates except man, have a bone called the
baculum
to shore themselves up -men still do not inevitably lose their

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