in the Plexiglas.
I check out my legs. I’m all about the leg. They’re super-long, which may not be an attribute now, as growing boys can be intimidated by female giants, but in the future they’ll definitely come in handy. One point for me.
I turn sideways, lift up my shirt and admire my stomach. It’s so flat, it’s concave. Boys like a girl with a flat stomach. I’m up to two.
When it comes to my upper arms, I don’t bother to flex. My biceps have always been nonexistent. Although I don’t think I can be penalized for that; biceps just don’t run in my family. My grandmother’s biceps have always hung upside down. But they are skinny, which is better than flabby, right? Okay, I’ll take half a point.
My eyes travel down and around the back. My crown, my glory—my butt. In the Plexiglas, my butt looks very nice. It’s perky, heart shaped, and full. I fill out the back pockets of my jeans completely. A perfect butt should be worth three points alone. I mean look how far J. Lo’s butt has gotten her. I should be so lucky to attract half as many husbands based on my perky cheeks.
Okay. I do the math in my head.
Five and a half points. That’s my total. Which means what? On a scale of one to ten, I’m five and a half. Five and a half? That’s bad. That’s real bad. Wait. No, that can’t be right. I didn’t list ten body parts. The equation has to be equal to the number of body parts being examined or it won’t be mathematically sound, but then again—
A shadow falls across the Plexiglas and startles me. After an involuntary squeal, which I have the feeling that I’ll regret for the rest of my life, I find myself face to glass-face with Danny.
“How…” I fight to gain my composure. “How…long have you been standing there?”
Did he see me staring at myself? Evaluating myself?
He lets out a low laugh. “I’ve been here like a minute.” He taps his fingers on the Plexiglas. “What are you looking at?” He stares at the display. “Are you going to homecoming?”
“What?” I try to keep my voice steady. “Why?”
“Um…I don’t know. You’re standing in front of a homecoming display.”
He points toward the window case, and for the first time, I notice what it says inside: FALL INTO FUN ON SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 19 . Underneath the caption is a picture of a couple in formal wear posing happily for the camera. Just seeing the camera makes me shudder.
“Oh….” I recover my composure. “Yeah, right.”
“So you are?”
“What?”
“Going…”
“Where?”
“To homecoming.”
“Homecoming?” I reply evasively.
“Susie…” Danny’s smile fades, but his tone is still lighthearted.
I wish he would just drop the whole conversation. I feel like I can barely breathe. What does he care? Unless…but the chances of Danny asking me to homecoming are zilch. He could ask anyone. Why would he want to ask me?
“No,” I tell him. “I’m not…going.”
“You’re not going?” he repeats.
“No.”
“You’re not going to homecoming?”
“No,” I say for the second time, “I’m not.” Why does he insist on making me repeat myself?
“This homecoming.” He taps the Plexiglas.
“Yes,” I say very slowly. “I am not going to that homecoming.”
“Oh,” he says with a smile.
“Oh?” Is he happy that I won’t be there?
“Your eye is twitching.” He leans forward and touches the corner of my eye, where a pulsation has just erupted.
“Can we go?” I ask impatiently.
“Yeah.” He smiles again, annoying me even further.
“Good.” I walk in front of him toward the library.
“Wait.” He lays his hand on my shoulder and I jump. “The library is closed.”
“What?” I drop my bag on the ground. “You’re joking. Why?”
He shrugs his shoulders. “The sign said inventory. But don’t worry, we’ll go somewhere else.”
“We don’t have anywhere else to go.” My eye twitch increases.
“Well, what about Mr. Murphy’s classroom?”
I check out my legs. I’m all about the leg. They’re super-long, which may not be an attribute now, as growing boys can be intimidated by female giants, but in the future they’ll definitely come in handy. One point for me.
I turn sideways, lift up my shirt and admire my stomach. It’s so flat, it’s concave. Boys like a girl with a flat stomach. I’m up to two.
When it comes to my upper arms, I don’t bother to flex. My biceps have always been nonexistent. Although I don’t think I can be penalized for that; biceps just don’t run in my family. My grandmother’s biceps have always hung upside down. But they are skinny, which is better than flabby, right? Okay, I’ll take half a point.
My eyes travel down and around the back. My crown, my glory—my butt. In the Plexiglas, my butt looks very nice. It’s perky, heart shaped, and full. I fill out the back pockets of my jeans completely. A perfect butt should be worth three points alone. I mean look how far J. Lo’s butt has gotten her. I should be so lucky to attract half as many husbands based on my perky cheeks.
Okay. I do the math in my head.
Five and a half points. That’s my total. Which means what? On a scale of one to ten, I’m five and a half. Five and a half? That’s bad. That’s real bad. Wait. No, that can’t be right. I didn’t list ten body parts. The equation has to be equal to the number of body parts being examined or it won’t be mathematically sound, but then again—
A shadow falls across the Plexiglas and startles me. After an involuntary squeal, which I have the feeling that I’ll regret for the rest of my life, I find myself face to glass-face with Danny.
“How…” I fight to gain my composure. “How…long have you been standing there?”
Did he see me staring at myself? Evaluating myself?
He lets out a low laugh. “I’ve been here like a minute.” He taps his fingers on the Plexiglas. “What are you looking at?” He stares at the display. “Are you going to homecoming?”
“What?” I try to keep my voice steady. “Why?”
“Um…I don’t know. You’re standing in front of a homecoming display.”
He points toward the window case, and for the first time, I notice what it says inside: FALL INTO FUN ON SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 19 . Underneath the caption is a picture of a couple in formal wear posing happily for the camera. Just seeing the camera makes me shudder.
“Oh….” I recover my composure. “Yeah, right.”
“So you are?”
“What?”
“Going…”
“Where?”
“To homecoming.”
“Homecoming?” I reply evasively.
“Susie…” Danny’s smile fades, but his tone is still lighthearted.
I wish he would just drop the whole conversation. I feel like I can barely breathe. What does he care? Unless…but the chances of Danny asking me to homecoming are zilch. He could ask anyone. Why would he want to ask me?
“No,” I tell him. “I’m not…going.”
“You’re not going?” he repeats.
“No.”
“You’re not going to homecoming?”
“No,” I say for the second time, “I’m not.” Why does he insist on making me repeat myself?
“This homecoming.” He taps the Plexiglas.
“Yes,” I say very slowly. “I am not going to that homecoming.”
“Oh,” he says with a smile.
“Oh?” Is he happy that I won’t be there?
“Your eye is twitching.” He leans forward and touches the corner of my eye, where a pulsation has just erupted.
“Can we go?” I ask impatiently.
“Yeah.” He smiles again, annoying me even further.
“Good.” I walk in front of him toward the library.
“Wait.” He lays his hand on my shoulder and I jump. “The library is closed.”
“What?” I drop my bag on the ground. “You’re joking. Why?”
He shrugs his shoulders. “The sign said inventory. But don’t worry, we’ll go somewhere else.”
“We don’t have anywhere else to go.” My eye twitch increases.
“Well, what about Mr. Murphy’s classroom?”
Similar Books
