Read Online Monday the Rabbi Took Off by Harry Kemelman - Free Book Online

enthusiastic agreement they gave when Bert Raymond remarked. “He certainly looks good.” And it was plain they all concurred when Marty Drexler added. “Now. that’s my idea of what a rabbi should look like.”
    The women were just as delighted with Mrs. Deutch as the men were with her husband. She. too. was tall with gray hair, which was brushed up in back and held in place by a comb. The effect was of a tiara, and it gave her an aristocratic, almost queenly appearance. And withal, she was so simple and democratic. When the president of the Sisterhood presented the officers of the organization to her, she said, “You know, girls, I’d never say it to Hugo, of course, but the plain fact is that it’s the Sisterhood that runs the temple.” They were enchanted.
    They all liked Miriam Small, but in the way they might like the college girl in bobby socks and loafers next door who might occasionally baby-sit for them. Beside Betty Deutch she seemed not merely young, but immature.
    When they came up to ask their advice about where the decorative candlesticks should be placed. Miriam said. “Oh, I’d put them near the middle of the table so they won’t be in the way of the pourers at either end.” Betty Deutch. on the other hand, stood back to get a better view of the table, came forward to move the candlesticks to the end of the table, went back to survey the effect, and then said. “This way they’re far enough from the end so they won’t bother the pourers too much, and the effect is to make the table seem longer. Don’t you think so. girls?”
    Their ready agreement carried the clear implication that it was Mrs. Deutch who was now the rebbitzin. Noticing it. Mrs. Deutch put her arm through Miriam’s, and as they strolled back to where their husbands were standing, she whispered. “In matters that don’t mean very much one way or another. I make it a point always to agree with the gals of the Sisterhood and to encourage them to do what they want to do.”
    “And how many do you get at a Friday evening service. Rabbi?” Rabbi Deutch was asking.
    “Anywhere from fifty to seventy-five usually.”
    Rabbi Deutch pursed his lips. “Out of a membership of almost four hundred families? Hrara. Do you do any advertising?”
    “Just the announcement in the press.”
    “Ah. well, in addition to the press release, we’ve always sent out postcards to arrive in Friday’s mail. I’ve found that very effective. Also. I always try to pick an intriguing title for my sermon. That helps, believe me. Something topical –”
    “Like sex?” asked Rabbi Small innocently.
    “As a matter of fact, sex in the Talmud was the title of one of my sermons. We got quite a turnout on that one.”
    The women now joined them. “I suppose you’re planning to do a lot of touring when you first arrive in Israel.” said Mrs. Deutch.
    “We haven’t made any plans, to tell the truth.” said Rabbi Small.
    “David isn’t much of a one for touring,” Miriam explained. “Rabbi Small is a scholar.” said Rabbi Deutch. “It’s my guess that he’ll be spending most of his time at the university library.11
    “I hadn’t thought of it.” said Rabbi Small. “I’m working on a paper, but I’ve already done the research.”
    “You mean you have no special plans for your stay?” asked Deutch.
    “Just to live there.”
    “Oh.” It hardly seemed reasonable to Rabbi Deutch, and he concluded that his colleague was being secretive.
    There was an awkward pause, and then Betty Deutch thought to ask. “Do you have family in Israel?”
    “David has no one. I have an aunt there. She’s the one who got us our apartment in Jerusalem, in Rehavia.”
    “Oh, that’s a nice section. My brother Dan is in Jerusalem now. If you like. I could give him your address. He’s been to Israel many times, lived there for about a year the last time. He knows the city well and could show you around.”
    “That’s Dan Stedman, the journalist?”
    “Yes,