Read Online Minimalism: Live a Meaningful Life by Joshua Fields Millburn, Ryan Nicodemus - Free Book Online
Book: Minimalism: Live a Meaningful Life by Joshua Fields Millburn, Ryan Nicodemus
Read Free Book Online
Authors: Joshua Fields Millburn, Ryan Nicodemus
Ads: Link
will settle for whatever is in front of you. Thus, you need a compelling vision of what you want your relationships to be, what you want your relationships to look like. If your vision is compelling enough, you’ll do anything to make it happen.
There are three things to consider when seeking new relationships (or improving your current relationships):
What do you really want? At the surface, this seems like a fairly vapid question, but it is of the utmost importance. Write down everything you want from your primary relationships (intimate relationships, close friendships, and the like). What do they look like? What do you want to do together? What do you want from them mentally, physically, spiritually, emotionally? What types of desires must these people have? What are their beliefs, values, rules, fears?
What must not occur within the relationship? You can find everything you want in a person, but if they also carry a belief or value you must not have in your life, it can ruin the entire relationship. For example, say you find an intimate relationship and the other person appears to have everything you wanted above, except he or she is unsupportive. If an unsupportive person is something you must not have, then that relationship will not work long-term. Go ahead, make your list of things that must not occur in your relationships.
Who do you need to become to attract this kind of person? Once you’ve determined what you want and what you must not have, you must determine what changes you’ll need to make within yourself to attract this kind of person as a friend, lover, or whatever relationship you are looking for. Must you listen more? Must you get into better shape? Must you learn how to better communicate? Write down what you’ll need to change in your life to attract these new relationships.
Once you’ve answered these three questions, read this list daily. It’s important to know what you’re looking for, what you want to avoid, and what you need to change within yourself to get these results.
Making Passionate Relationships Work
Commonalities make relationships work, but differences make relationships exciting and passionate. You need both—commonalities and differences—to make passionate relationships work long-term.
Sometimes people enter into a relationship based solely on chemistry. Chemistry is typically associated with variety, and it’s great at first. It’s easy to be attracted to someone because they are different. Unfortunately, chemistry alone is not sustainable. Over time, too many differences can become annoying, frustrating, and troublesome. And as we mentioned earlier, some differences in areas like values, beliefs, and individual needs can completely destroy a relationship in the long-run.
Conversely, sharing a lot of commonalities with someone sounds great, but having too many things in common becomes boring. Being just like someone else lacks the variety you need to keep your relationship passionate. Too often a relationship falls apart because, instead of working together as a team, the two people become extensions of each other, appendages that get in the way.
The best relationships share a healthy combination of commonalities and differences. While you embrace the things you have in common, you can also learn to respect and enjoy your differences. Doing so will allow you to experience the balance of certainty and variety necessary for a sustainable, meaningful relationship.
Eight Fundaments of Great Relationships
Meaningful relationships have eight main elements that must be nurtured for the relationships to grow and improve over time: love, understanding, trust, honesty, caring, support, time, and authenticity. The following eight sections discuss each of these fundaments.
Love
It is possible to dislike certain parts of a person and still love every piece of them. Your primary relationships require immense amounts of love. If you truly love someone,
There are three things to consider when seeking new relationships (or improving your current relationships):
What do you really want? At the surface, this seems like a fairly vapid question, but it is of the utmost importance. Write down everything you want from your primary relationships (intimate relationships, close friendships, and the like). What do they look like? What do you want to do together? What do you want from them mentally, physically, spiritually, emotionally? What types of desires must these people have? What are their beliefs, values, rules, fears?
What must not occur within the relationship? You can find everything you want in a person, but if they also carry a belief or value you must not have in your life, it can ruin the entire relationship. For example, say you find an intimate relationship and the other person appears to have everything you wanted above, except he or she is unsupportive. If an unsupportive person is something you must not have, then that relationship will not work long-term. Go ahead, make your list of things that must not occur in your relationships.
Who do you need to become to attract this kind of person? Once you’ve determined what you want and what you must not have, you must determine what changes you’ll need to make within yourself to attract this kind of person as a friend, lover, or whatever relationship you are looking for. Must you listen more? Must you get into better shape? Must you learn how to better communicate? Write down what you’ll need to change in your life to attract these new relationships.
Once you’ve answered these three questions, read this list daily. It’s important to know what you’re looking for, what you want to avoid, and what you need to change within yourself to get these results.
Making Passionate Relationships Work
Commonalities make relationships work, but differences make relationships exciting and passionate. You need both—commonalities and differences—to make passionate relationships work long-term.
Sometimes people enter into a relationship based solely on chemistry. Chemistry is typically associated with variety, and it’s great at first. It’s easy to be attracted to someone because they are different. Unfortunately, chemistry alone is not sustainable. Over time, too many differences can become annoying, frustrating, and troublesome. And as we mentioned earlier, some differences in areas like values, beliefs, and individual needs can completely destroy a relationship in the long-run.
Conversely, sharing a lot of commonalities with someone sounds great, but having too many things in common becomes boring. Being just like someone else lacks the variety you need to keep your relationship passionate. Too often a relationship falls apart because, instead of working together as a team, the two people become extensions of each other, appendages that get in the way.
The best relationships share a healthy combination of commonalities and differences. While you embrace the things you have in common, you can also learn to respect and enjoy your differences. Doing so will allow you to experience the balance of certainty and variety necessary for a sustainable, meaningful relationship.
Eight Fundaments of Great Relationships
Meaningful relationships have eight main elements that must be nurtured for the relationships to grow and improve over time: love, understanding, trust, honesty, caring, support, time, and authenticity. The following eight sections discuss each of these fundaments.
Love
It is possible to dislike certain parts of a person and still love every piece of them. Your primary relationships require immense amounts of love. If you truly love someone,
Similar Books
