Read Online Maybe I Will by Laurie Gray - Free Book Online Page B

popping two in my mouth at the same time.
    I was still sucking on the Altoids when the doctor started feeling around on my lymph nodes and wanted to take a look at my throat. Just as Mom said, “Spit those things out,” I swallowed, and down they went.
    â€œThey’re gone,” I said, opening my mouth wide and letting the doctor push down my tongue with a wooden tongue depressor. Then he put on a glove and grabbed my tongue, twisting it up and down and all around while I did my best to suppress the glugging and gurgling noises. He had me lay down and poked around at my liver and spleen. Then he sent me out to empty my bladder in a specimen cup.
    When I returned he was sitting on his little rolling stool, swiveling gently back and forth as Mom recounted my symptoms over the past few weeks. I could feel him staring at me. “I don’t think it’s mono,” he said, “but we’ll run some tests and see what we come up with. I’d like to get a blood sample, too.” He turned to Mom. “You can wait here while I walk Sandy down to the phlebotomist.” Then he turned to me. “Come with me, Sandy.”
    I followed the doctor down the hall and into a cluttered office. “Have a seat,” he said, pointing to a chair in front of a desk heaped with papers and files while he took a seat behind the desk. “Your mom says you’ve had fatigue and flu-like symptoms for several weeks.” I nodded. “You’re 16?” I nodded again. “Sandy, I brought you down here because I want to ask you something straight up, and I want you to be able to answer me without worrying about what your mom might think.”
    Instant anxiety seized every cell of my body. I could not meet Dr. Parks’ eyes. I fixed my eyes on the floor and held my breath.
    â€œI smelled alcohol when I was examining your tongue and throat. That’s not something I would expect to smell on the breath of a teenager at 8:00 in the morning.”
    â€œMaybe it was the Altoids,” I offered. “They’re crème-dementhe flavor.”
    â€œMaybe. The urine and blood tests will tell me if I’m wrong. I just wanted to give you the chance to tell me about it now if it’s going to show up on these tests.”
    I continued to stare at the floor.
    â€œIs there any chance that I’ll find alcohol in your blood or urine?”
    I winced. “Maybe,” I stammered. “Maybe there’s alcohol in the Nyquil I took.”
    â€œYour mom didn’t say anything about your taking Nyquil.”
    â€œShe doesn’t know. I have the bottle in my backpack.” I felt a huge rush of relief as the story just seemed to flow. “I bought it at the grocery store because it’s for the flu. I’m not supposed to take it to school, but it’s almost gone. I was going to take the rest of it before I got to school and throw it away before I went in the building. I just wanted to feel better so my parents would let me start taking taekwondo with a friend of mine over spring break.”
    I looked up at the doctor. He was rubbing his chin. “Are you taking it as directed?”
    I nodded. “Do you think that’s what’s making me tired?”
    â€œI don’t know,” Dr. Parks replied. “What do you think?”
    I tried to look him in the eye, but I just couldn’t do it. I shrugged my shoulders and looked away.
    â€œYour symptoms sound a lot like depression to me. Is there anything bothering you?”
    Part of me wanted to tell him, to just say it. But my throat was tightening, and my eyes were getting watery, and the words simply wouldn’t come. “I’m just tired,” I finally mumbled.
    The doctor waited a long time before he said, “No more Nyquil. Let’s get the blood drawn, and then we’ll throw away whatever’s in your backpack.”
    â€œAre you going to tell my mom?” I asked.
    â€œNot if