free from hers.
“No thanks. Not tonight.”
“Jeez, what happened to you?” she pouts. “You used to be fun, but no more. Is it the ghost girl? Has she sucked all the life out of you?”
She doesn’t use a name, but I know who she’s referring to, and it pisses me off. “You don’t know anything about her, Amanda. If you did, you wouldn’t say things like that. Or maybe you would, because that’s the kind of person you are. Either way, you’re not someone I care to hang around with anymore.”
~Kori~
There’s a difference between being alone and being lonely. I’m fine with the former, but the latter sucks. I like my space, my peace and quiet, my me time. I can handle alone just fine. Lonely I don’t do well with. And tonight, I find myself feeling lonely.
Not just lonely, though. Confused.
If my mom were still here, I could talk to her. Or if I had an older sister... I’ve always wanted a sister. Sure, my kid brother is great, but I can’t exactly talk to him about a guy. I can’t really talk to my dad, either. As for friends, I don’t exactly have a whole lot of them. So who does that leave?
I lay back on my bed and dial Colorado. My uncle answers. “Hi Uncle Paul,” I greet him. “Is Aunt Alison there?”
“Sure, I’ll get her. Is something wrong, Kori?”
I shake my head even though he can’t see me. “No, I’m okay. I just want to talk to Alison.”
Less than a minute later, my aunt is on the phone. “Hey, Korinne. This is a surprise.”
Alison is one of the few people that calls me by my full name, and it’s something she only started after my mom—her sister—got sick. It’s like she knew she’d kind of be taking on the mother role in my life. Not that anyone can fill that void, but Alison tries and I love her for it. “Is it a bad time?” I ask.
“No, not at all. We’re going to the Avs game tonight, but we don’t have to leave for a half hour or so.”
“Sounds like fun,” I say. She and my uncle are big Colorado Avalanche fans and have season tickets to the games.
“The season’s almost over, and probably no playoffs. Again,” she says. “Anyway, I know you didn’t call to talk about hockey. What’s up? How’s school going?”
“Pretty good. I had a test today in Psychology, and I think I aced it.”
“Hey, that’s great!” my aunt says, and I can tell she’s happy for me.
We talk for a few more minutes about school and my classes before I get to the point of the call. “I met someone. A guy.”
“Oh!” Alison exclaims. “Do tell.”
I chuckle at her enthusiasm. She’s only ten years older than me, and sometimes seems more like an older sister than an aunt or maternal figure, which is great. It’d be even better if she didn’t live so far away. “He plays on the school baseball team, and he’s really sweet and smart.”
“And cute?” my aunt urges.
“Yes, that too,” I say. “And he asked me out.”
“Then why on earth are you calling me on a Friday night?” Alison demands. “Please don’t tell me you said no.” I don’t answer right away, and she sighs. “You said no, didn’t you? Oh, Korinne, what am I going to do with you?”
I sit up and fold my knees underneath me. “I wanted to say yes. Does that count for anything?”
A lull of silence follows before Alison says, “Yes. It’s progress. It tells me maybe you want to keep living.”
“Of course I do,” I insist. It’s figuring out how that I struggle with.
“Good. Then do me a favor. The next time this cute, sweet, smart guy asks you out, say yes, okay? Or better yet, the next time you see him, ask him,” she challenges.
“Or what?”
“Or I might just have to fly all the way across the country to give you a kick in the butt,” Alison says, laughing. “Because you know that’s exactly what my sister would want me to do, right?”
“Yes, I know,” I say quietly. As usual, she knows exactly the right thing to say. “Thanks, Aunt
“No thanks. Not tonight.”
“Jeez, what happened to you?” she pouts. “You used to be fun, but no more. Is it the ghost girl? Has she sucked all the life out of you?”
She doesn’t use a name, but I know who she’s referring to, and it pisses me off. “You don’t know anything about her, Amanda. If you did, you wouldn’t say things like that. Or maybe you would, because that’s the kind of person you are. Either way, you’re not someone I care to hang around with anymore.”
~Kori~
There’s a difference between being alone and being lonely. I’m fine with the former, but the latter sucks. I like my space, my peace and quiet, my me time. I can handle alone just fine. Lonely I don’t do well with. And tonight, I find myself feeling lonely.
Not just lonely, though. Confused.
If my mom were still here, I could talk to her. Or if I had an older sister... I’ve always wanted a sister. Sure, my kid brother is great, but I can’t exactly talk to him about a guy. I can’t really talk to my dad, either. As for friends, I don’t exactly have a whole lot of them. So who does that leave?
I lay back on my bed and dial Colorado. My uncle answers. “Hi Uncle Paul,” I greet him. “Is Aunt Alison there?”
“Sure, I’ll get her. Is something wrong, Kori?”
I shake my head even though he can’t see me. “No, I’m okay. I just want to talk to Alison.”
Less than a minute later, my aunt is on the phone. “Hey, Korinne. This is a surprise.”
Alison is one of the few people that calls me by my full name, and it’s something she only started after my mom—her sister—got sick. It’s like she knew she’d kind of be taking on the mother role in my life. Not that anyone can fill that void, but Alison tries and I love her for it. “Is it a bad time?” I ask.
“No, not at all. We’re going to the Avs game tonight, but we don’t have to leave for a half hour or so.”
“Sounds like fun,” I say. She and my uncle are big Colorado Avalanche fans and have season tickets to the games.
“The season’s almost over, and probably no playoffs. Again,” she says. “Anyway, I know you didn’t call to talk about hockey. What’s up? How’s school going?”
“Pretty good. I had a test today in Psychology, and I think I aced it.”
“Hey, that’s great!” my aunt says, and I can tell she’s happy for me.
We talk for a few more minutes about school and my classes before I get to the point of the call. “I met someone. A guy.”
“Oh!” Alison exclaims. “Do tell.”
I chuckle at her enthusiasm. She’s only ten years older than me, and sometimes seems more like an older sister than an aunt or maternal figure, which is great. It’d be even better if she didn’t live so far away. “He plays on the school baseball team, and he’s really sweet and smart.”
“And cute?” my aunt urges.
“Yes, that too,” I say. “And he asked me out.”
“Then why on earth are you calling me on a Friday night?” Alison demands. “Please don’t tell me you said no.” I don’t answer right away, and she sighs. “You said no, didn’t you? Oh, Korinne, what am I going to do with you?”
I sit up and fold my knees underneath me. “I wanted to say yes. Does that count for anything?”
A lull of silence follows before Alison says, “Yes. It’s progress. It tells me maybe you want to keep living.”
“Of course I do,” I insist. It’s figuring out how that I struggle with.
“Good. Then do me a favor. The next time this cute, sweet, smart guy asks you out, say yes, okay? Or better yet, the next time you see him, ask him,” she challenges.
“Or what?”
“Or I might just have to fly all the way across the country to give you a kick in the butt,” Alison says, laughing. “Because you know that’s exactly what my sister would want me to do, right?”
“Yes, I know,” I say quietly. As usual, she knows exactly the right thing to say. “Thanks, Aunt
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