Read Online Louise Rennison_Georgia Nicolson 06 by Then He Ate My Boy Entrancers - Free Book Online

Eddie. Joy unbounded. Uncle Eddie has a Hawaiian shirt like Dad’s. Hurrah! I am going on holiday with two porky surfers.
    Uncle Eddie gave Dad a high five and said, “Hello hello hello, big up for the lads.”
    Oh lordy lordy.
    I went to the loo, and when I came back into the room, Dad and Uncle Eddie and Grandad were wearing blond Afro wigs.
    Why?
    It all became hideously clear when Dad said, “Let the ‘Hello America’ Abba tribute begin.”
    Oh nooo.
    9:15 p.m.
    Me and Jas are holed up in my room whilst the grown-ups are singing “Waterloo.” I said to her, “This is a good opportunity for you to nip downstairs and start ringing people in New York, New York called Scarlotti.”
    She didn’t even bother to stop straightening her fringe.
    9:28 p.m.
    Another ring of the doorbell.
    Sound out the bells of England: it was the ace gang. Yesssss!!! Even Jas forgot she was having a grumpathon.
    Jools, Rosie, Mabs and Ellen all gave the time-honored Klingon salute. Rosie said, “We’re not staying, because we are going to the Catfish for a bop, but we have come with a message of wisdomosity.”
    Oooohhh, how sweet.
    They said all together: “Have a good time ALL of the time.”
    And then Rosie said, “ Bon voyage and also Bon Jovi. See you in the next life, don’t be late.”
    One farewell burst of disco inferno and they were gone.
    in the hall
9:30 p.m.
    Jas went back to her fringe-straightening duties in my bedroom, but as the olds were singing along to “Dancing Queen” I quickly phoned international directory enquiries. The lady operator had not beenfacilitated into the mystery of helpfulnosity, because when I politely said, “Good evening, would you connect me to anyone in New York, New York, who has the surname Scarlotti?” she said, “Don’t be so bloody silly.” And put the phone down.
    This is what the British empire has come to.
    in bed
11:05 p.m.
    Jas needn’t have gone to all the trouble of making a lesbian barrier of pillows, because Libby has come into the bed in the middle of us.
    Uncle Eddie has taken Maisie home on his motorbike and Grandvati is sleeping in Libby’s bedroom.
    11:10 p.m.
    Libby is in the middle of Jas and me. She is looking from one to the other of us. Smiling. With no front teeth.
    I don’t trust this smiling business.
    Libby was turning her head from side to side, looking at Jas and then looking at me.
    I must make her go to sleep. I said, “Night-night then, Bibsy; time for boboland. Shall I sing you a little nighttime song?”
    â€œNo.”
    ten minutes later
    She won’t stop turning her head from side to side, saying, “Naaaiiice, naaiiice.”
    It’s very unnerving.
    Then she just suddenly fell asleep. Just kajonk. Asleep. No yawning, just unconscious. How strange is that? How do they do that, the toddly-type people, the instant-falling-asleep thing?
    Jas whispered to me, “I will never get to sleep. I’m just thinking and thinking about Tom.”
    Then she just went kajonk asleep. She is vair vair superficial.
    Oh God. Anyway, I am never going to get to sleep either, as I am so excited beyond the valley of the excited and into the…zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

let the nuddy-pants bison-disco-inferno dance commence!
    sunday may 22nd
8:30 a.m.
    Cor, we are quite literally up at the crack of dawn.
    I had no sooner slumped into a dream about my lips turning into hamburgers and Masimo spreading some tomato sauce on them than Mum was shaking me awake.
    She was dressed in some new jeans, which I have never seen before and never want to see again.
    â€œMum, do they like the prostitute look in Hamburger-a-gogo?”
    Mum said, “Don’t start.”
    But I am not wrong.
    9:00 a.m.
    Up and dressed in my traveling outfit. Finally decided on my pale blue ribbed T-shirt, cool jeansand pearl-buckle leather belt with my highest-heeled shoes. (The highest heels