believe you would or will give me any freebies in the getting-to-know-you department? Because really, Rowen. I’ve seen brahma bulls that open up easier than you.”
I knew that was true. I had a million issues, the most apparent one being my inability to open up to others, but hearing it from Jesse still hurt like hell. In a little over twenty-four hours, he had figured that out about me.
Only because I felt a little belligerent did I snap back when I should have shut my mouth and gotten back to folding. “Oh, really? Two ton bulls who can’t talk, have kiwi-sized brains, and basically want to kill you if you come within ten feet of them open up better than I do?” I stepped into him, trying to get into his face. I stepped back when I realized just how close that put me to his mouth. “What do you want to know then, Cowboy? What are you so certain I’ve been hiding from you? What could someone like you possibly want to know about someone like me?”
The words spilled from his mouth like he’d only been waiting for me to ask. “Why are you here?”
That was quite possibly the easiest hard question to answer.
“I want to go to art school in the fall,” I said, hoping that answer would appease him. Knowing it wouldn’t.
“And what does Willow Springs have to do with art school in the fall?” He searched my face like he expected the answers to be there if he looked close enough.
I inhaled slowly to give myself a chance to put together my answer. “The school I want to go to is expensive. My mom only agreed to fund it if I came and worked here this summer.” I did an internal cartwheel; honest, yet vague. Just the way I preferred my answers.
“Why would your mom only agree to pay for school if you worked the summer here?” Jesse asked with genuine curiosity. He leaned into the island and waited for my response.
“Your dad and mom didn’t tell you why I was coming here?” I found that hard to believe.
He shrugged his shoulders. “They told the girls and me that the daughter of one of Mom’s old friends was coming to spend the summer with us. There weren’t any additional details.”
“They didn’t tell you why?” If it wasn’t for the innocence of Jesse’s expression, that would have been utterly impossible to believe.
“No,” he said with another shrug. “And I didn’t ask.”
I didn’t know what was worse: assuming Jesse knew what a bad egg I was all along, or realizing I’d have to tell him face-to-face.
Either way, I was about to find out.
“I’m here because I mess up, Jesse. I mess up a lot. So much my own mom has pretty much written me off as a lost cause. I’m a failure at pretty much everything—I barely graduated high school—and, for whatever reason, she chose Willow Springs as the place I could redeem myself and prove to her I’m not the piece of shit failure she thinks I am.” The words came out strong, but I felt anything but. Admitting that to Jesse, a person I wanted to like me, I really wanted to like me, made me feel weak and vulnerable.
Jesse’s expression didn’t change. His eyes didn’t leave mine. Nothing I said ruffled him. “Rowen,” he said, moving his hand toward mine like he wanted to grab it. At the last moment, he pulled back. “I’ve known you a solid day and a half, and I would swear on my life that you’re not a lost cause. Or a failure.”
I opened my mouth to interrupt.
“Or a piece of shit failure,” he said, making air quotes with one hand. “So why are you really here?”
Just like that, he’d moved past the whole Rowen-Sterling-Is-A-Waste-Of-Space topic. Apparently it was settled in his mind I was not the person my mom, ninety-nine percent of other people I’d come in contact with, and myself, as of late, thought I was. The only thing that mattered to him was why I was there.
“Because I don’t have any other option,” I whispered, looking away from him at last. Our conversation in the laundry room had gone about five
I knew that was true. I had a million issues, the most apparent one being my inability to open up to others, but hearing it from Jesse still hurt like hell. In a little over twenty-four hours, he had figured that out about me.
Only because I felt a little belligerent did I snap back when I should have shut my mouth and gotten back to folding. “Oh, really? Two ton bulls who can’t talk, have kiwi-sized brains, and basically want to kill you if you come within ten feet of them open up better than I do?” I stepped into him, trying to get into his face. I stepped back when I realized just how close that put me to his mouth. “What do you want to know then, Cowboy? What are you so certain I’ve been hiding from you? What could someone like you possibly want to know about someone like me?”
The words spilled from his mouth like he’d only been waiting for me to ask. “Why are you here?”
That was quite possibly the easiest hard question to answer.
“I want to go to art school in the fall,” I said, hoping that answer would appease him. Knowing it wouldn’t.
“And what does Willow Springs have to do with art school in the fall?” He searched my face like he expected the answers to be there if he looked close enough.
I inhaled slowly to give myself a chance to put together my answer. “The school I want to go to is expensive. My mom only agreed to fund it if I came and worked here this summer.” I did an internal cartwheel; honest, yet vague. Just the way I preferred my answers.
“Why would your mom only agree to pay for school if you worked the summer here?” Jesse asked with genuine curiosity. He leaned into the island and waited for my response.
“Your dad and mom didn’t tell you why I was coming here?” I found that hard to believe.
He shrugged his shoulders. “They told the girls and me that the daughter of one of Mom’s old friends was coming to spend the summer with us. There weren’t any additional details.”
“They didn’t tell you why?” If it wasn’t for the innocence of Jesse’s expression, that would have been utterly impossible to believe.
“No,” he said with another shrug. “And I didn’t ask.”
I didn’t know what was worse: assuming Jesse knew what a bad egg I was all along, or realizing I’d have to tell him face-to-face.
Either way, I was about to find out.
“I’m here because I mess up, Jesse. I mess up a lot. So much my own mom has pretty much written me off as a lost cause. I’m a failure at pretty much everything—I barely graduated high school—and, for whatever reason, she chose Willow Springs as the place I could redeem myself and prove to her I’m not the piece of shit failure she thinks I am.” The words came out strong, but I felt anything but. Admitting that to Jesse, a person I wanted to like me, I really wanted to like me, made me feel weak and vulnerable.
Jesse’s expression didn’t change. His eyes didn’t leave mine. Nothing I said ruffled him. “Rowen,” he said, moving his hand toward mine like he wanted to grab it. At the last moment, he pulled back. “I’ve known you a solid day and a half, and I would swear on my life that you’re not a lost cause. Or a failure.”
I opened my mouth to interrupt.
“Or a piece of shit failure,” he said, making air quotes with one hand. “So why are you really here?”
Just like that, he’d moved past the whole Rowen-Sterling-Is-A-Waste-Of-Space topic. Apparently it was settled in his mind I was not the person my mom, ninety-nine percent of other people I’d come in contact with, and myself, as of late, thought I was. The only thing that mattered to him was why I was there.
“Because I don’t have any other option,” I whispered, looking away from him at last. Our conversation in the laundry room had gone about five
Similar Books
