on top of mine.
âAnd Milton says weâre doing weight-training all next week,â adds a petite redhead, almost spilling her beer.
âHeâll kill us all!â Holly groans. She turns to me. âEveryone, this is Natasha. Ellen, Alex, James.â She nods at each person in turn. I wave, and they offer assorted hellos.
âSo where are you from?â asks the guy crammed next to me. Alex, I think it is.
âL.A. originally.â I smile, glad to be buried in the middle of a crowd for the first time in what seems like forever. âBut I go to school just up the coast.â
âCalifornia!â The redhead sighs longingly. âBeaches, sunshineâ¦â
âSurfing,â Alex adds. âWhat on earth are you doing here?â
I giggle. âItâs cool to have a change.â
âBloody freezing, you mean.â
âYup, the weather does suck,â I admit. âBut Oxford is amazingâall the old buildings, the historyâ¦â
ââ¦the sadistic rowing instructors.â Another guy arrives at our table in time to finish my sentence. âDid you hear what Milton wants us to do next week?â
And with that, Iâm buried in the middle of a raging debate on rival crew teams and Raleighâs chances of success. As their enthusiastic conversation surrounds me, I feel a glow of warmth that has nothing to do with the overheated room. Professor Elliot is wrongâIâm not here for the easy way out. I can do this. I know I can.
Emily
After my mini-breakdown at the beach, I donât accept any more of Morganâs invitations. As much as I want to get along here, I canât bear the thought of that panic or uncertainty again, so by the end of my third week, Iâm back in a perfectly structured routine, every hour from eight until five neatly accounted forâthanks to my wall-chart organizer. Morning runs, library sessions, classic film watching, and, of course, classes; if I ever get lonely or start to question what Iâm doing here, all it takes is a quick glance above my desk at the daily schedule to calm myself down again.
In addition to Professor Lowellâs screenwriting session, Natasha is also signed up for a range of core curriculum and film modules. The core material is a breeze: the sort of basic education requirements I could complete in my sleep, but to my surprise, the film work is actually interestingâfull of ideas and concepts Iâve never come across before, everything from the business side of the industry to sociological readings of performance and script. Throwing myself completely into the work, I can almost see why someone would voluntarily choose to study it.
As the rush of students around me stampedes toward the door of my only morning lecture, I take a moment to check I have all the photocopied notes and reading suggestions. Iâm finally adjusting to the size of this place, with cavernous lecture halls full of earnest film geeks and slacker students. My days of personal debate with my tutor are on hold for now, but the anonymity is refreshing. I see the same faces from some of my other classes: emo boy, perky girl, and Ryan, but nobody expects anything more than a smile or nod from me. I used to have to always be the one with the superior argument or insightful comment, but here I only have to show up.
Itâs the first time people have ever expected so little from me.
I finally finish double-checking my books and slip into the aisle, bumping straight into somebody else. âExcuse me,â I apologize, still fastening my bag.
âNo problem,â a familiar voice drawls, edged with the slightest hint of sarcasm.
My head snaps up and I find Ryan in front of me, slouched in a maroon print hoodie and regarding me with extreme impatience.
âOh, itâs you.â
âCould you sound any more thrilled?â His face twists into a half smile. âYouâre giving my ego a