his crush around.â
âWe went through that in class.â I try to keep my voice gentle. I can tell heâs liable to get defensive. âI know you donât want the romance to be the main focus, but theyâre the best scenes. You want them to be the dramatic high point.â
Thereâs a long pause. Ryan looks back down at the script and flicks his pencil against the edge of the table.
Tap-tap-taptap
. It echoes in the tiny space.
Tap-tap-taptap
.
âCan you not do that?â
Tap-tap-taptap.
I glare at him. He smirks back.
âRelax,â he tells me. I sigh, pulling my hair back into a tighter plait.
âThe changes?â I remind him.
âSure, whatever.â His voice is so nonchalant, I canât believe it.
ââWhateverâ?â I repeat. âI thought this was the most important thing in your life.â
âLowellâs always telling us to get distance from our work.â Ryan begins to smile now that he knows heâs annoying me. And just for good measure, he begins with the pencil again.
Tap-tap-taptap
. I have to fold my hands together to stop myself reaching out and snatching it from him.
âWe start shooting on Saturday,â he says, as if I donât already have a schedule mapped out, complete with time for delays and weather problems. Not that thereâs any weather in California. âThe first few days will probably be working out the kinks, getting light and sound figured.â
âFine.â I run my eyes down the long, long list of prefilming tasks Iâve been making. Another boy from class, Mike, is supposed to be producing, but I only needed one look at his red-rimmed eyes and bagful of snacks to decide Iâd better run this myself if I want anything done. âHere.â I tear off the bottom of the pageâthe least necessary thingsâand pass it to him. âYouâll need to get these sorted before we start.â
Ryan folds the paper carelessly and throws it in his bag.
âItâs important,â I remind him. âYou wonât get anyone working without clear schedules and a shot-by-shot plan.â
âAlready covered,â he drawls, surprising me. âDonât look at me like me that. Iâve been planning this longer than you.â
âWell, all right.â I frown. âI think thatâs it.â Iâd set aside another hour for this meeting, expecting tantrums and ultimatums at the very least.
âCool, Iâll see you by the equipment room on Saturday.â Ryan pulls his shoes back on and slings his bag over his shoulder. âNice work on the rewrites.â
Heâs gone before I recover from the parting compliment.
With time to spare before a graduate screening of short films, I linger in the library and browse the social science sections for a little pleasure reading. I organized for my Oxford professors to email me the assignments so I can be certain that I donât miss too much, but sometimes itâs nice just to wander the stacks and see what catches my eye. Picking out a couple of books on democracy, I find a quiet area with some desks and couches and settle in.
But I canât concentrate. Usually I can put a book in my hands and be oblivious to the world. Itâs a great skill for studying, but for some reason my superpowers arenât working today. Every movement, every sound: they all catch my attention, and soon Iâm watching the people around me closer than my work. Back in Oxford, libraries are silent and sacrosanct, but here people donât seem to care about keeping quiet. Two boys in sports shirts are complaining over their notes, a blond girl bobs her head in time to her iPod, and two girls are giggling together behind a stack of books. Their desk is spread with candy wrappers, magazines, and colored pens, and studying looks like the last thing on their minds as they hiss at each other.
âShhh, sheâll