problem.”
She felt herself go on lockdown, heard every click as she bolted shut her emotions. If he would move, she could get up and away. Charlie would not fall apart. She was a strong woman. Jeeves had been in her life for four months—she survived before him and she’d be just fine without him.
Just fine.
“One month.”
“What?” she asked.
“And I think we should be pen pals,” he said amicably.
The words didn’t sink in. How could they? They were ridiculous. “Pen pals?”
“Yes.”
“We live next door to each other.”
He still held her hands as he got off the floor and back to the couch. “It will be great. We can get to know each other without me sneaking looks down your shirt every day.”
Charlie needed a Dramamine to keep up with the ups and downs of this day. “There is absolutely nothing sneaky about the way you look down my shirt.”
“Think about it, Cleaver. A long, friendly courtship through the mail. No pressure, no Marvin Gaye—just you and me tearing down walls.”
“You’re serious about this.”
“And none of that electronic mail garbage. I want long, flowery letters written in your own hand.”
Charlie rolled her eyes. “Should I spray the paper with my perfume too?”
“You don’t wear perfume.”
“Jeeves, I don’t see how this is going to solve any of our problems.”
He rubbed her hand gently. “Let’s just give it a shot. I can work on my issues, you can work on your issues, and I’ll build a dog run between our houses so Medusa can have joint custody of us.”
He was serious. At least he was portraying it pretty earnestly.
“So, what happens when I see you at Mel’s? Or the post office? Or…outside? Am I supposed to ignore you?”
Jeeves pondered that for a minute. She could tell he was pondering because he stuck his tongue in his cheek and frowned. “We can wave.”
“Wave,” Charlie repeated.
“And polite small talk is okay if we’re in public. I don’t want to give those old coots at the bar any more ammunition.”
“Right. This is weird, you know that, right?”
Jeeves helped her to her feet. “Do you know how many courtships carried on via love letters during world wars?”
“Yes, lots. Because those people were separated by oceans and countries, not a strip of grass.”
Jeeves steered her to the door, of all things. “This is going to be great. You’ll see.”
“So now you’re kicking me out?”
He leaned his forehead into hers, staring into her eyes, his hands cupping her head. “Charlotte Jeeves,” he began, his voice smoky and deep. “You have one month to prepare. I’m not playing around anymore. One month…and then…”
“And then what?”
He moved his mouth to her ear and he whispered low and dangerous. “And then I’m going to do things to your body that will make you blush for a year. And I’m going to do them slow, real slow.”
The bones in her legs softened to wet noodles.
“And I’m going to do them hard.”
Her breath hitched.
“And I swear to God, I’m going to do them until you beg me for mercy, and then I’ll do them some more.”
She was sure she was about to melt on the entry rug.
Jeeves kissed her forehead. “And you’re never going to wonder again.”
Chapter Seven
February 1
Dear Jeeves,
I’m not sure, exactly, how it worked out that you had this idea—but I have to go first. As usual, you manipulated me into doing something I don’t want to do.
I don’t even know how to start. I’ve never had a pen pal before. I can’t catch you up on gossip because we live in the same town and ninety percent of the town’s gossip is about the two of us anyway. We already know each other, so I don’t need to tell you where I came from or what I look like.
And, no, I’m not about to tell you what I’m wearing either.
In the spirit of this exercise, I guess I will try to tell you something that you might not know…I began a sketch of you last night. I
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