L. A. Candy

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Authors: Lauren Conrad
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night.
    Ah, this must be the engineering quad. How did she end up here?
    Scarlett saw from the map that this area was called Archimedes Plaza—named after the ancient Greek mathematician. She remembered from some book that Archimedes had invented elaborate war machines, like the “heat ray,” which supposedly reflected sunlight off a bunch of mirrors and burned enemy ships. That was kind of awesome, in Scarlett’s opinion.
    In another life, she could have imagined herself as a brilliant, bad-ass mathematician like Archimedes. But in this life…
    Scarlett glanced down at her schedule, peeking out from behind the map. She knew that her parents really, really wanted her to be pre-med. Her mother, who thought she was such a clever shrink, liked to do that “reverse psychology” crap and would say things like, “Scarlett, sweetheart, it’s probably best if you do something other than medicine, so you can have your own identity,” which loosely translated as: “Your father and I both went into medicine, so you should, too” (if you could call charging $400 an hour for telling patients not to be so hard on themselves, or vacuuming fat out of people’s stomachs because they’d been brainwashed into thinking they weren’t thin enough, “medicine”). Scarlett knew that they were secretly waiting and hoping for her to sign up for courses like neurobiology and general physiology. Well, no, thank you.
    She was perfectly happy with her English and philosophy classes. It had been hard to pick just a few from the catalog. Modern Philosophy and the Meaning of Life. Introduction to Contemporary East Asian Film and Culture. Women Writers in Europe and America. Sex Similarities and Differences: A Multidisciplinary Approach. (That would be an easy class—most men are assholes, and most women are assholes, too, except with makeup?) She had to take some freshmen intro classes though, sowhile she couldn’t have all these courses now, she was determined to sign up for them at some point over the next four years. Or however long she lasted at U.S.C.
    Not that she would flunk out or anything. On the contrary, she wondered if she had done the right thing, coming here. Maybe she should have aimed higher, like an Ivy? Transferring was always on option. But then she and Jane wouldn’t be able to live together. Scarlett knew that she wasn’t an easy person to be close to. Jane was the only one who’d put up with her bullshit over the years and stuck around—no, not just stuck around, but been the most loyal friend imaginable. She didn’t trust anyone else like she trusted Jane.
    Just then, a voice interrupted her.
    “Hi, there! Are you new here?”
    Scarlett glanced up. A girl flashing two rows of perfect white teeth stood in front of her. She was tall and thin, with bleached blond hair and a pair of large, spray-tanned breasts practically popping out of her maroon U.S.C. tank. (Daddy issues, Scarlett concluded. Girls like her didn’t get enough love from their daddies growing up, so they end up desperate for male attention. Girls like her would’ve fallen all over someone like Trevor Lord. Oops, was she starting to sound like Mom the shrink?) “Guilty as charged,” Scarlett said.
    “Hey, I’m Cammy! Welcome to U.S.C.!”
    “Hi, Cammy! I’m Scarlett! Thanks for the welcome!” Scarlett’s super-fake smile faded quickly, and she turned to go. Cammy would get the hint.
    “Wait! I was just wondering, Charlotte—are you planning to rush?”
    Scarlett frowned. “Scarlett. Umm, should I? I don’t think Introduction to Contemporary East Asian Film and Culture is going to fill up before I get there.”
    Cammy giggled. “Ha-ha, good one! Next week is rush week! You should totally think about joining Pi Delta! Not to bid promise or anything.”
    Pi Delta? Scarlett thought. A sorority? Seriously?
    “Pi Delt is awesome!” Cammy went on. “Rush week rocks, too! There’s Unity Day, and there’s Spirit Day, and there’s Pride

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