the
shirt will be ruined, but he doesn’t listen.
I
pass out on Luke’s lap before I can feel Tommy make the first turn off his
block.
Chapter Six
I
OPEN MY eyes to discover I am in my bedroom. I have no recollection of arriving
home last night but I am more than grateful to be here. God only knows how
awkward and embarrassed I would be if I had ended up at Tommy’s or worse,
Luke’s. There is no way I can face him, at least not until I have had time to
figure things out for myself.
I
make the mistake of touching my head. With a sharp breath through clenched
teeth, I wince in pain as my hand sweeps across a gauze bandage covering the
right side of my forehead. I kick myself free of the sheets and take several
unbalanced steps to my mirror. Dried blood knots my hair, covers my chest,
shoulder and a good part of the dress I am still wearing from last night. I
take a deep breath and peel back the bandage. Six stitches hold a two-inch wide
gash closed. My forehead looks like something a kindergartner painted. I’m a
swollen color collage of maroon, green and black.
Smelly
and utterly grossed out, I start the shower. As my blood turns the water red I
replay last night repeatedly in my mind. What is it about the name Leo? Should
I know it? Should it roll this effortlessly off my tongue? Should it possess a
part of me I feel is foreign? Should a name feel like a breath? Because it
does. And though I know my sanity over it all should be questioned, this
figure, this Leo, is the only momentum I have propelling me forward. Only when
I think of him do I forget the cold touch of reality. And now this name has
become more significant than my own.
When
the water runs clear, I step out of the shower and dress in sweat pants and an
old high school football shirt. As I make my way downstairs, I’m surprised to
hear voices coming from the kitchen. I walk in to find Luke and Amber sitting
at the table whispering.
“Mornin’.”
Luke stands the second he sees me, masking worry with a forced smile.
“What
are you guys doing here?”
“We
stayed over last night. We didn’t want you to be alone, just in case.” Amber
replies.
From
the look of her red rimmed, dark circled eyes, I know she has not slept.
“In
case what?” I ask but they both stand there looking baffled, waiting for the
other to answer.
“Where’s
your bandage?” He deliberately sidesteps my question. I can’t figure out why
but something’s up.
“I
took it off to shower.” I say brushing loose strands of hair from around the
wound.
“Oh.
I’ll get another.” Amber hurries past us, taking the stairs two at a time. I
know the girl well enough to tell she is avoiding me.
“Does it
hurt?” Luke asks eyeing my forehead. He steps closer to me.
“A
little.”
“Here,
this might help. The doctor said some Tylenol would take care of the pain.”
Moving
to the kitchen island Luke pulls a bottle of Tylenol from a white plastic bag.
I walk over to him as he grabs another bottle off the counter. This one is a
prescription with my name on it. Luke takes two small blue pills out and hands
them to me along with the Tylenol. He turns to the fridge grabbing a bottle of
water and places it in front of me.
“What’s
this?” I can’t remember the last time I had a prescription. I had my tonsils
removed when I was four. My mother said it was the reason I rarely got sick.
Luke
takes a moment and from his creased brow and clenched jaw, I’d say he’s picking
his words carefully. “What you’ve been through, it’s had an effect. The doc
thinks it’s unipolar depression.” He says with a calm but direct demeanor.
It’s
like I’ve been removed and from the sidelines I’m helpless as Luke beats me
down. I’m flabbergasted. There’s no way he really just said that , I
assure myself. I’ve grieved in my own way, sure. Depressed to the point where I
deserve a label and medication is required,
shirt will be ruined, but he doesn’t listen.
I
pass out on Luke’s lap before I can feel Tommy make the first turn off his
block.
Chapter Six
I
OPEN MY eyes to discover I am in my bedroom. I have no recollection of arriving
home last night but I am more than grateful to be here. God only knows how
awkward and embarrassed I would be if I had ended up at Tommy’s or worse,
Luke’s. There is no way I can face him, at least not until I have had time to
figure things out for myself.
I
make the mistake of touching my head. With a sharp breath through clenched
teeth, I wince in pain as my hand sweeps across a gauze bandage covering the
right side of my forehead. I kick myself free of the sheets and take several
unbalanced steps to my mirror. Dried blood knots my hair, covers my chest,
shoulder and a good part of the dress I am still wearing from last night. I
take a deep breath and peel back the bandage. Six stitches hold a two-inch wide
gash closed. My forehead looks like something a kindergartner painted. I’m a
swollen color collage of maroon, green and black.
Smelly
and utterly grossed out, I start the shower. As my blood turns the water red I
replay last night repeatedly in my mind. What is it about the name Leo? Should
I know it? Should it roll this effortlessly off my tongue? Should it possess a
part of me I feel is foreign? Should a name feel like a breath? Because it
does. And though I know my sanity over it all should be questioned, this
figure, this Leo, is the only momentum I have propelling me forward. Only when
I think of him do I forget the cold touch of reality. And now this name has
become more significant than my own.
When
the water runs clear, I step out of the shower and dress in sweat pants and an
old high school football shirt. As I make my way downstairs, I’m surprised to
hear voices coming from the kitchen. I walk in to find Luke and Amber sitting
at the table whispering.
“Mornin’.”
Luke stands the second he sees me, masking worry with a forced smile.
“What
are you guys doing here?”
“We
stayed over last night. We didn’t want you to be alone, just in case.” Amber
replies.
From
the look of her red rimmed, dark circled eyes, I know she has not slept.
“In
case what?” I ask but they both stand there looking baffled, waiting for the
other to answer.
“Where’s
your bandage?” He deliberately sidesteps my question. I can’t figure out why
but something’s up.
“I
took it off to shower.” I say brushing loose strands of hair from around the
wound.
“Oh.
I’ll get another.” Amber hurries past us, taking the stairs two at a time. I
know the girl well enough to tell she is avoiding me.
“Does it
hurt?” Luke asks eyeing my forehead. He steps closer to me.
“A
little.”
“Here,
this might help. The doctor said some Tylenol would take care of the pain.”
Moving
to the kitchen island Luke pulls a bottle of Tylenol from a white plastic bag.
I walk over to him as he grabs another bottle off the counter. This one is a
prescription with my name on it. Luke takes two small blue pills out and hands
them to me along with the Tylenol. He turns to the fridge grabbing a bottle of
water and places it in front of me.
“What’s
this?” I can’t remember the last time I had a prescription. I had my tonsils
removed when I was four. My mother said it was the reason I rarely got sick.
Luke
takes a moment and from his creased brow and clenched jaw, I’d say he’s picking
his words carefully. “What you’ve been through, it’s had an effect. The doc
thinks it’s unipolar depression.” He says with a calm but direct demeanor.
It’s
like I’ve been removed and from the sidelines I’m helpless as Luke beats me
down. I’m flabbergasted. There’s no way he really just said that , I
assure myself. I’ve grieved in my own way, sure. Depressed to the point where I
deserve a label and medication is required,
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