sat down to eat and the only utensil the food monger had at the ready was a spoon.
Yeah, how intimidating could that thing be?
He'd probably have a heart attack , I thought, stifling a snicker .
That or he'd just use his fingers...
I'm guessing the latter. I don't think he'd let something like a lack of proper eating utensils keep him from his food.
Ephraim looked horrified suddenly.
"You mean like ... lady stuff ?" he blurted, then immediately snapped his mouth shut.
He suddenly looked worried, like he thought he'd said the wrong thing, once again.
I laughed and gave 'E' a quick pat on the back.
"Don't you worry, Ephraim," I consoled him, trying to keep a straight face, "the next time I have to go to the gynecologist, you can personally take me. I'll even introduce you to him, if you like."
"Him?" he asked, startled, "Do I have to?" His blue eyes were wide with mortification, jaw slack, fork dangling precariously from his hand.
Everyone broke out into loud guffaws at the look of utter dread and dismay on Ephraim's face, seeping out from his tone.
You'd think someone had just told him his favorite dog had died.
I glanced over at Reeve and saw a smile kicking up at the corners of his mouth.
He has a nice smile , I discovered, even if he is a grumpy, mooning happy, mean ol’ bastard.
He looked over at me, but I quickly averted my gaze, turning back to the guys.
"Don't look so put out, Ephraim, I was just kidding."
"Oh, thank god!" He relaxed visibly, "I thought you'd really make me do it."
"Why would I want to take you with me?" I asked curiously.
Sometimes I ask him things just to hear what he's going to say.
I'm terrible and I'm very aware of it, but things are so much more interesting with him around.
"Uhm…" he hummed under his breath, taking a minute to think about it, "Moral support?"
I burst out laughing, imagining him breaking out into a sweat as he stewed in the waiting room, surrounded by women- of which he has no clue how to talk to- and diagrams of vaginas, birth control brochures and sonogram offers everywhere, his big frame squashed into a tiny chair, sandwiched between two women.
Moral support.
He'd probably be the one to need 'moral support' after he'd insulted one too many women in there and gotten the purse beating of a life time.
He frowned at me, not seeing the humor at the idea, and I laughed harder as I busied myself with the dishes.
I listened and laughed along as Sawyer reminded Bowen to tell him what all had transpired earlier, and Bowen gleefully relayed the tale of Reeve's demotion to 'moonshine' as they all finished breakfast.
I hurried through my chores when I glanced at the kitchen clock and realized how much time had passed.
Time really flies when you're hurling insults at each other , I thought, laughing a little, anxiety aside, about all that had transpired this morning as I rushed out the door.
Enough dilly dallying, Vieve, you have an appointment to make!
Hear! Hear! I seconded myself.
When did I start talking to myself in my head so much?
Oh, well, I like my own company better anyways.
Erm, well, most days.
An Apple A Day...
"You should file a complaint," I told Aunt Ruthie, "I mean, that's a long time to make someone wait for such an important appointment!"
"Hush, Vieve, this is my second appointment. The first one was weeks ago," she said easily, breezing past me.
"I didn't take you." I frowned, following after her, confused.
What’s she talking about?
And if I didn’t take her, then who did?
"Barry did, dear." She answered my question before I'd even voiced it.
"But I take you to all of your appointments," I spluttered, blinking at her.
She shook her head and waved me off.
"I asked him to. It's no big thing, hun."
It isn't? I thought stupidly.
"I beg to differ," I muttered quietly under my breath, brows pulled down low over my eye lids.
She just smiled and patted my cheek.
"You wait right here, sweetheart, I'll be back," she
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