don’t even try to deny it. You would never say something like that to me normally. I don’t know why you said it, but I know you didn’t mean it. Things are…strange between us right now and have been for a while, but I know you wouldn’t intentionally hurt me. So I’m going to forgive you for what you said. And then we’re not going to talk about it again, unless you want to explain why you said what you did.”
I swallow; my eyes downcast as I nod. “Okay.”
“Okay.”
I tug her to me, tightly wrapping my arms around her and squeezing. “Okay.”
Lily hugs me back. “Okay.”
I draw away, a grin on my lips. “Okay.”
She rolls her eyes. “That’s enough with the okays.”
“Okay.” I laugh when she makes a swipe at me, beginning to jog.
Lily’s legs are much shorter than mine, so I try to keep pace with her. I’m almost a whole foot taller than her 5’2” frame. I grew out of my short and chubby faze around the age of twelve. I don’t think Lily’s grown at all since she was that age. I grin at the thought, nudging her arm with mine as we run.
“So your graduation party— “ she begins.
“Not having one,” I say, cutting her off.
“Grayson. You have to have a graduation party. You’re graduating . It’s a tradition for seniors. You’ll be, like, the first senior in the history of forever not to have one.”
“The history of forever? Is there a book on that?”
Not many people are up this early on a Saturday morning. The sound of our shoes hitting the pavement is loud in the quiet. I focus on my breaths, keeping them even and deep. My legs and chest begin to burn. The first mile is always the hardest and always the easiest time to give up, but I’ve found the key is to keep going—it gets easier and the fact that I’m running almost becomes an afterthought the farther I go.
“I can’t believe your parents are okay with this.”
“They’re not. Doesn’t matter. I don’t want one.”
“ Wh y?”
“It’s an unnecessary expense. I don’t need one. I don’t really want one.”
“But—“
“Lily. No .” We’ve been over this for months—me saying I don’t want one and Lily trying to convince me to have one. Graduation isn’t a celebration to me; it’s just one more step closer to my real life. It’s a necessary achievement to get where I want to be—away from here. And the thought of my mom being drunk in front of an innumerable amount of people— fuck no. I don’t need that embarrassment.
“If it’s about your mom—“
I turn my head to glare at her.
She sighs and changes the subject. “Mia is begging me to go tonight.”
The conversation just went from bad to worse.
I grit my teeth, but try to keep my voice even as I say, “I thought you were going anyway.”
“After he hit you in the head with a basketball? That would be like me saying it was okay or something that he pulled a jerk move like that. Of course I don’t want to go. No. ”
Her protectiveness makes me want to grin idiotically, but I settle for a quick smile. “So don’t go.” Please don’t go.
Lily sighs again. “ I’m torn. I feel bad knowing Mia won’t go unless I go. Is it completely out of the question to think maybe you would go too?”
I give her a sidelong glower, not speaking.
“I thought so.”
“Can’t Mia find someone else to go with her?”
“Bethany is out of town with her parents for the weekend.”
We cross the street, heading toward the high school. It’s a mile there. We run three when we get there and then the mile back.
“Bethany and you are the only ones that can go with her?”
“Bethany and I are pretty much Mia’s only friends.” She says it matter-of factly and without malice.
“There’s a reason for that.”
“I know. Mia has a big mouth, but she also has a big heart.”
“So you’re saying the one makes the other tolerable?” I shoot her a dubious look as we jog up a small hill. The cold air feels good against my
I swallow; my eyes downcast as I nod. “Okay.”
“Okay.”
I tug her to me, tightly wrapping my arms around her and squeezing. “Okay.”
Lily hugs me back. “Okay.”
I draw away, a grin on my lips. “Okay.”
She rolls her eyes. “That’s enough with the okays.”
“Okay.” I laugh when she makes a swipe at me, beginning to jog.
Lily’s legs are much shorter than mine, so I try to keep pace with her. I’m almost a whole foot taller than her 5’2” frame. I grew out of my short and chubby faze around the age of twelve. I don’t think Lily’s grown at all since she was that age. I grin at the thought, nudging her arm with mine as we run.
“So your graduation party— “ she begins.
“Not having one,” I say, cutting her off.
“Grayson. You have to have a graduation party. You’re graduating . It’s a tradition for seniors. You’ll be, like, the first senior in the history of forever not to have one.”
“The history of forever? Is there a book on that?”
Not many people are up this early on a Saturday morning. The sound of our shoes hitting the pavement is loud in the quiet. I focus on my breaths, keeping them even and deep. My legs and chest begin to burn. The first mile is always the hardest and always the easiest time to give up, but I’ve found the key is to keep going—it gets easier and the fact that I’m running almost becomes an afterthought the farther I go.
“I can’t believe your parents are okay with this.”
“They’re not. Doesn’t matter. I don’t want one.”
“ Wh y?”
“It’s an unnecessary expense. I don’t need one. I don’t really want one.”
“But—“
“Lily. No .” We’ve been over this for months—me saying I don’t want one and Lily trying to convince me to have one. Graduation isn’t a celebration to me; it’s just one more step closer to my real life. It’s a necessary achievement to get where I want to be—away from here. And the thought of my mom being drunk in front of an innumerable amount of people— fuck no. I don’t need that embarrassment.
“If it’s about your mom—“
I turn my head to glare at her.
She sighs and changes the subject. “Mia is begging me to go tonight.”
The conversation just went from bad to worse.
I grit my teeth, but try to keep my voice even as I say, “I thought you were going anyway.”
“After he hit you in the head with a basketball? That would be like me saying it was okay or something that he pulled a jerk move like that. Of course I don’t want to go. No. ”
Her protectiveness makes me want to grin idiotically, but I settle for a quick smile. “So don’t go.” Please don’t go.
Lily sighs again. “ I’m torn. I feel bad knowing Mia won’t go unless I go. Is it completely out of the question to think maybe you would go too?”
I give her a sidelong glower, not speaking.
“I thought so.”
“Can’t Mia find someone else to go with her?”
“Bethany is out of town with her parents for the weekend.”
We cross the street, heading toward the high school. It’s a mile there. We run three when we get there and then the mile back.
“Bethany and you are the only ones that can go with her?”
“Bethany and I are pretty much Mia’s only friends.” She says it matter-of factly and without malice.
“There’s a reason for that.”
“I know. Mia has a big mouth, but she also has a big heart.”
“So you’re saying the one makes the other tolerable?” I shoot her a dubious look as we jog up a small hill. The cold air feels good against my
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