Read Online I Sleep in Hitler's Room by Tuvia Tenenbom - Free Book Online
Authors: Tuvia Tenenbom
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glitzy room and I’m immediately welcomed by a big TV that begs to spoil me. Erotic films are here for me, if I want. On the screen is this sexy young lady, lying so suggestively, and smiling at me. Even TV ladies love me! Such a good feeling! The Ritz is also happy to allow me to use a bathrobe for my pleasure, free of charge. I can also buy this robe, if I want, for only 128 euros. A
steal. Maybe I’ll buy it, but later. I say good-bye to my Lover Lady on the screen and go out. I’ll come back, Lover. I will see Autostadt and then come back. Will you wait for me, Love?
Autostadt, a German Disney, is plain gorgeous. Everything is glitzy, shiny, and you can’t smoke on the street. VW cares about people, and smoking is bad for the health. Gas is good, but smoking is bad.
Angelique, one of the employees, takes me on a privately guided tour of the car-delivery system at Autostadt. Obviously many German clients elect to come here and pick out their car at the source.
First she shows me to the two glass silos, shining towers that house the Volkswagens delivered on location. Already today, 690 cars were delivered. It’s a marvel to watch. A forklift picks the car from the belly of the silo, as you watch, to be handed to you in just a bit. It’s like the delivery of a baby, the silo being the womb.
There’s a whole spiel to follow. When you actually get your car, VW agents come by equipped with cameras. They take pictures of you, and whoever is with you, standing next to the new car. This picture-taking ceremony reminds me of a wedding. The buyer and the car, in sickness and in health.
What VW has done here is wonderful: creating a community of great shoppers, of lovable followers.
Don’t laugh at me. It really works. Say what you want, this is definitely a love affair. Between the German buyer and his car.
Here’s a family who drove 500 km to get their car at Autostadt.
They are very happy they came all the way up here. It’s a special experience. They will even stay at the Ritz an extra day. Just decided. But “the wife is better than the car,” says the hubby. “She is softer.”
I’m starting to understand—starting!—what Unwilling Capitalism is all about. Maybe I’ll convert. Won’t you?
There’s a wonderful proclamation on the wall in the Audi Pavilion:
To us,
Vorsprung
[leading] is an inner drive. The innermost drive.
Vorsprung
is in our genes.
Vorsprung durch Technik
[leading through technology] . . . this is where superiority comes to bear.
It’s
Vorsprung
. I like it much. I want to be German. Tuvia Schmidt.
On the first floor of Volkswagen GroupForum you can see the Level Green exhibition. it’s something about how people of next generations will have a good life, provided we do our part. VW is here to show us how.
Another exhibition nearby is about irrigation and how to save water.
Next to every exhibition there’s a well-dressed person, an employee whose job it is to explain to you all kinds of good things. I like the way they look: like they just came out of the shower. For us.
I’m surrounded by love.
I have a chat with one of these employees, René. “Volkswagen recognizes its responsibility for the world,” he says to me, and that’s why they expend human resources on water shortages across our planet.
The Jewish Irritating Voice in me shouts into my ears, There are two possibilities here: 1) The people who come here don’t believe a word this René says, and 2) they believe him. If possibility no. 1 is correct, then VW must be the laughingstock of Germany. It doesn’t look it. If possibility no. 2 is correct, the Germans are the most naïve of people on our planet.
Shut up, Irritating Voice! Listen to René, he’s talking to you! It takes 150 liters of water for one orange, René continues to share with me, and VW wants to find ways how to improve the system.
Will Volkswagen also build an exhibition on world peace? I ask him.
Oh, that’s difficult, says René.
steal. Maybe I’ll buy it, but later. I say good-bye to my Lover Lady on the screen and go out. I’ll come back, Lover. I will see Autostadt and then come back. Will you wait for me, Love?
Autostadt, a German Disney, is plain gorgeous. Everything is glitzy, shiny, and you can’t smoke on the street. VW cares about people, and smoking is bad for the health. Gas is good, but smoking is bad.
Angelique, one of the employees, takes me on a privately guided tour of the car-delivery system at Autostadt. Obviously many German clients elect to come here and pick out their car at the source.
First she shows me to the two glass silos, shining towers that house the Volkswagens delivered on location. Already today, 690 cars were delivered. It’s a marvel to watch. A forklift picks the car from the belly of the silo, as you watch, to be handed to you in just a bit. It’s like the delivery of a baby, the silo being the womb.
There’s a whole spiel to follow. When you actually get your car, VW agents come by equipped with cameras. They take pictures of you, and whoever is with you, standing next to the new car. This picture-taking ceremony reminds me of a wedding. The buyer and the car, in sickness and in health.
What VW has done here is wonderful: creating a community of great shoppers, of lovable followers.
Don’t laugh at me. It really works. Say what you want, this is definitely a love affair. Between the German buyer and his car.
Here’s a family who drove 500 km to get their car at Autostadt.
They are very happy they came all the way up here. It’s a special experience. They will even stay at the Ritz an extra day. Just decided. But “the wife is better than the car,” says the hubby. “She is softer.”
I’m starting to understand—starting!—what Unwilling Capitalism is all about. Maybe I’ll convert. Won’t you?
There’s a wonderful proclamation on the wall in the Audi Pavilion:
To us,
Vorsprung
[leading] is an inner drive. The innermost drive.
Vorsprung
is in our genes.
Vorsprung durch Technik
[leading through technology] . . . this is where superiority comes to bear.
It’s
Vorsprung
. I like it much. I want to be German. Tuvia Schmidt.
On the first floor of Volkswagen GroupForum you can see the Level Green exhibition. it’s something about how people of next generations will have a good life, provided we do our part. VW is here to show us how.
Another exhibition nearby is about irrigation and how to save water.
Next to every exhibition there’s a well-dressed person, an employee whose job it is to explain to you all kinds of good things. I like the way they look: like they just came out of the shower. For us.
I’m surrounded by love.
I have a chat with one of these employees, René. “Volkswagen recognizes its responsibility for the world,” he says to me, and that’s why they expend human resources on water shortages across our planet.
The Jewish Irritating Voice in me shouts into my ears, There are two possibilities here: 1) The people who come here don’t believe a word this René says, and 2) they believe him. If possibility no. 1 is correct, then VW must be the laughingstock of Germany. It doesn’t look it. If possibility no. 2 is correct, the Germans are the most naïve of people on our planet.
Shut up, Irritating Voice! Listen to René, he’s talking to you! It takes 150 liters of water for one orange, René continues to share with me, and VW wants to find ways how to improve the system.
Will Volkswagen also build an exhibition on world peace? I ask him.
Oh, that’s difficult, says René.
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