said he was drinking and drugging. Said he got crazy when she started seeing that other guy, his head just broke. He said he lost it.
Well, that cleared things up. That’s why Mom showed upto Nonnie’s that day trying to take us from him. That’s why Grandpa slapped him in the face. That’s why she wouldn’t let him in the house anymore and he’d always try to come in anyway.
Knife wasn’t that big, he said; it was more symbolic.
The very next breath, he’d say, “Look at this, we’re alone, she did this to us! She broke up our family. Ya all I got left; all we got is each otha! We gotta be good to each otha.”
And he’d clutch the steering wheel, sobbing, and we’d nod and comfort him.
And when I was in the car with my mom, I’d say, “Mom, why’d you break up our family? Why’d you do this to us?” She’d never say anything bad about my dad and I’d just stay on her till I saw tears fall from her eyes and something in me liked that.
He joined AA to get her back, said it was the alcohol that made him act that way. Didn’t work. He ended up just fucking the rehab chicks. No one was buying it anyway; it takes commitment to be a drunk and he lacks that. He’s no drunk, he’s just crazy.
He’d get mad when my ma’s people wouldn’t invite him to Christmas. Every year it was the same thing. “Oh, that broke dick Darryl is invited and not me? He’s not even family! Ya own fatha isn’t welcome? That’s bullshit, that really hurts. You gonna let them do this to ya own fatha? Ya not gonna stick up for me?”
Till years later, finally we were like, “Well, goddamn, of course Darryl is invited, he didn’t rape Mom.”
His eyes’d well up and he’d start mumbling shit and then he’d bring it up again the next year.
I’m in my car now, thinking about Julie, all our fights, all the times I spazzed out and punched the walls, how I scared her. How I’m my father’s son. Thinking about how I could’ve done things better. Singing along with Willie, You were always on my mind. You were always on my mind.
coop-coop
JINX USED TO FUCK AROUND on Shae all the time. We’d be coming from some chick’s house and Shae would beep him and we’d have to go get her a corned beef sandwich from the Coney.
She loved those sandwiches. He’d show up with a corned beef smelling like some other bitch and she ain’t never say shit.
Jinx and Dont got caught fucking some hood rats. Turns out one of the chicks was Shae’s cousin. He never met that one, lived in the same city and everything. Bad luck, I guess. Jinx blamed Dont, said he set it up and talked him into doing it.
I don’t think Shae believed him, but she made herself. She wouldn’t let Jinx and Dont hang out no more. Dont was real hurt off that.
We’re talking about it years later. I tell him, “What you expect? He was in damage control, that motherfucker got a kid wit her. That’s his wife. You think he’s gonna sacrifice all that to stay boys wit you? Shit, man, come on.”
Dont would plead, “Yeah, but that was out cold, he cut me off. He just cut me off. We was boys, Jude, we was all boys. You don’t do that to your boy.”
Yeah, we was boys, but Jinx was Jinx. He was the same motherfucker that’d try to put his dope up under my seat when we’d drive around town.
I’d be like, “Jinx, get that shit from out under my seat, man, or I ain’t getting in the car.”
“I ain’t finna put it under my seat, what if we get pulled over? They gonna blame me. I’m black.”
“They gonna blame you cuz it’s yours. ”
I’d remind Dont, and he’d be like, “Man, I miss that dude anyway.”
Growing up, we used to bang chicks for shoes, shirts, their car, money, anything. See who’d get the most.
I did all right with the rich black girls. I’d get some Perry Ellis or Nautica cologne. Jinx’d pull the hood rats and maybe get some Jordans out of them. But Jinx’s half brother Myron was the best at it because he got the white
Well, that cleared things up. That’s why Mom showed upto Nonnie’s that day trying to take us from him. That’s why Grandpa slapped him in the face. That’s why she wouldn’t let him in the house anymore and he’d always try to come in anyway.
Knife wasn’t that big, he said; it was more symbolic.
The very next breath, he’d say, “Look at this, we’re alone, she did this to us! She broke up our family. Ya all I got left; all we got is each otha! We gotta be good to each otha.”
And he’d clutch the steering wheel, sobbing, and we’d nod and comfort him.
And when I was in the car with my mom, I’d say, “Mom, why’d you break up our family? Why’d you do this to us?” She’d never say anything bad about my dad and I’d just stay on her till I saw tears fall from her eyes and something in me liked that.
He joined AA to get her back, said it was the alcohol that made him act that way. Didn’t work. He ended up just fucking the rehab chicks. No one was buying it anyway; it takes commitment to be a drunk and he lacks that. He’s no drunk, he’s just crazy.
He’d get mad when my ma’s people wouldn’t invite him to Christmas. Every year it was the same thing. “Oh, that broke dick Darryl is invited and not me? He’s not even family! Ya own fatha isn’t welcome? That’s bullshit, that really hurts. You gonna let them do this to ya own fatha? Ya not gonna stick up for me?”
Till years later, finally we were like, “Well, goddamn, of course Darryl is invited, he didn’t rape Mom.”
His eyes’d well up and he’d start mumbling shit and then he’d bring it up again the next year.
I’m in my car now, thinking about Julie, all our fights, all the times I spazzed out and punched the walls, how I scared her. How I’m my father’s son. Thinking about how I could’ve done things better. Singing along with Willie, You were always on my mind. You were always on my mind.
coop-coop
JINX USED TO FUCK AROUND on Shae all the time. We’d be coming from some chick’s house and Shae would beep him and we’d have to go get her a corned beef sandwich from the Coney.
She loved those sandwiches. He’d show up with a corned beef smelling like some other bitch and she ain’t never say shit.
Jinx and Dont got caught fucking some hood rats. Turns out one of the chicks was Shae’s cousin. He never met that one, lived in the same city and everything. Bad luck, I guess. Jinx blamed Dont, said he set it up and talked him into doing it.
I don’t think Shae believed him, but she made herself. She wouldn’t let Jinx and Dont hang out no more. Dont was real hurt off that.
We’re talking about it years later. I tell him, “What you expect? He was in damage control, that motherfucker got a kid wit her. That’s his wife. You think he’s gonna sacrifice all that to stay boys wit you? Shit, man, come on.”
Dont would plead, “Yeah, but that was out cold, he cut me off. He just cut me off. We was boys, Jude, we was all boys. You don’t do that to your boy.”
Yeah, we was boys, but Jinx was Jinx. He was the same motherfucker that’d try to put his dope up under my seat when we’d drive around town.
I’d be like, “Jinx, get that shit from out under my seat, man, or I ain’t getting in the car.”
“I ain’t finna put it under my seat, what if we get pulled over? They gonna blame me. I’m black.”
“They gonna blame you cuz it’s yours. ”
I’d remind Dont, and he’d be like, “Man, I miss that dude anyway.”
Growing up, we used to bang chicks for shoes, shirts, their car, money, anything. See who’d get the most.
I did all right with the rich black girls. I’d get some Perry Ellis or Nautica cologne. Jinx’d pull the hood rats and maybe get some Jordans out of them. But Jinx’s half brother Myron was the best at it because he got the white
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