Read Online Humble Boy by Charlotte Jones - Free Book Online Page B

Followed by ‘Moonlight Serenade’. I’d just drift off. Easy.
    Rosie    Dad!
    George    Christ. I never would, Rosie love. It’s a mug’s game.
    Felix    A length of hose. Yes.
    Flora    What about you, Felix? What is your preferred method?
    Felix    Well, in an ideal world, I’d like to jump through a black hole.
    George    I’m sure it could be arranged.
    Flora    Why, Felix?
    Felix    Just a whim of mine.
    Flora    Tell me why.
    Felix    Well, I’d find out what it was like inside.
    George    How thrilling.
    Felix    It would be for a theoretical physicist.
    Rosie    Who doesn’t get out much.
    Felix    Theoretical physicists don’t get out much.
    Rosie    Well, come on then, enlighten us.
    Felix    You get to pass through the event horizon and down into the state of singularity. The point where all mathematical equations break down and you break up into a thousand million particles. I think that would be quite satisfying.
    Rosie    Doesn’t sound much fun to me.
    Felix    The beauty of it is you get to carry on. Well, maybe you do.
    Rosie    But it wouldn’t be you. It would just be bits of you.
    Felix    It’d be the essence of me. I’d be recycled. The particles of my body would go off and form another universe. It’s a kind of immortality.
    Rosie    If it’s immortality you want, I think it’s easier just to have a baby.
    Flora    Is that what you want, Felix? How very mundane. If you can’t make your mark while you’re here, what’s the point?
    Mercy    Nobody’s eating my soup.
    Felix    Do you think my father made his mark?
    Flora    No. Sadly. I think he would probably feel that he hadn’t.
    Felix    You know, Mother, one day scientists at NASA pointed the Hubble Telescope at what they thought was an empty speck of the sky and they saw a void teeming with galaxies. They saw clusters of stars billions of years old that they never knew about.
    Flora    ( sharply ) What are you trying to say, Felix?
    George    Yes. If you’ve got something to say, I think you ought to say it.
    Mercy    Couldn’t we save it till after the first course?
    Felix    I rather thought that it was you and my mother who had something to say.
    Mercy    I’ll get some bread.
    Flora    Sit down, Mercy. You invited yourself, so you can sit through this.
    Mercy sits down.
    Rosie    Felix, why are you being so difficult? You know what they want.
    Mercy    He can’t think on an empty stomach.
    Rosie    They want to get married. Big deal. You take everything too much to heart.
    Mercy    You’re getting married?
    George    Yes, we are.
    Mercy    ( a little crestfallen ) Oh. How lovely.
    Felix    ( raising his glass ) Yes! Isn’t it! Come on, Mercy. Raise your glass for the Humble Pyes! A match made in Moreton!
    George    I don’t give a fart for your opinion, sonny.
    Felix    And I’m not talking to you, Pops. Just answer me this, Mother. What do you see in him?
    Mercy    Oh. There’s a lot to see in George. He’s a very nice man underneath.
    George    Thank you, Mercy.
    Mercy    You’re welcome.
    Flora    I do not need your blessing, Felix. But it would be nice.
    Felix    It’s a bit late for my blessing, isn’t it? My father died two months ago but –
    Flora    At last Felix is up to speed.
    Felix    – but this has been going on for years. The world and his wife are privy to this information.
    Rosie    Leave it, Felix.
    Mercy    I didn’t know for