life needed attention: unpaid bills, frequent gas leaks, mice, runs in her last pair of hose, hostile, quarreling neighbors, dripping faucets, frivolous heating, street dogs, and the insane price of hamburger. None of these irritations did Frank take seriously, and in all honesty she couldn’t blame him. She knew that buried underneath the pile of complaints lay her yearning for her own house. It infuriated Lily that he shared none of her enthusiasm for achieving that goal.In fact he seemed to have no goals at all. When she questioned him about the future, what he wanted to do, he said, “Stay alive.” Oh, she thought. The war still haunted him. So, whether annoyed or alarmed, she forgave him much: like that time in February when they went to a church convention held on a high school football field. Known more for table after table of delicious free food than for proselytizing, the church welcomed everybody. And everybody came—not only members of the congregation. The nonbelievers, crowding the entrance and lining up for food, outnumbered the believers. Literature passed out by serious-looking young people and sweet-faced elders was stuffed into purses and side pockets. When the morning rain stopped and sunlight sashayed through the clouds, Lily and Frank exchanged their slickers for sweaters and strolled hand in hand to the stadium. Lily held her chin a bit higher and wished Frank had had a haircut. People gave him more than a passing glance, probably because he was so tall, or so she hoped. Anyway, they were in high spirits all afternoon—chatting with people and helping children load their plates. Then, smack in the middle of all that cold sunlight and warm gaiety, Frank bolted. They had been standing at a table, piling seconds of fried chicken on their plates, when a little girl with slanty eyes reached up over the opposite edge of the table to grab a cupcake. Frank leaned over to push the platter closer to her. When she gave him a broad smile of thanks, he dropped his foodand ran through the crowd. People, those he bumped into and others, parted before him—some with frowns, others simply agape. Alarmed and embarrassed, Lily put down her paper plate. Trying hard to pretend he was a stranger to her, she walked slowly, her chin up, making no eye contact, past the bleachers and away from the exit Frank had taken.
When she returned to the apartment, she was thankful to find it empty. How could he change so quickly? Laughing one second, terrified the next? Was there some violence in him that could be directed toward her? He had moods, of course, but was never argumentative or the least threatening. Lily drew up her knees and, with her elbows leaning on them, pondered her confusion and his, the future she wanted and the question of whether he could share it. Dawn light seeped through the curtains before he returned. Lily’s heart jumped when she heard the key turn in the lock, but he was calm and, as he put it, “beat up with shame.”
“Was it something to do with your time in Korea that spooked you?” Lily had never asked about the war and he had never brought it up. Good, she had thought. Better to move on.
Frank smiled. “My time?”
“Well, you know what I mean.”
“Yeah, I know. It won’t happen again. Promise.” Frank enclosed her in his arms.
Things went back to normal. He worked at a car wash in the afternoons, she at Wang’s weekdays and doing alterations on Saturdays. They did less and less socializing, but Lily didn’t miss it. The occasional movie was enough until they sat through
He Ran All the Way
. Afterward Frank spent part of the night clenching his fist in silence. There were no more movies.
Lily’s sights were set elsewhere. Little by little she was being singled out for her sewing skills. Twice she had made lace for a bridal veil and, after embroidering a linen tablecloth at the request of a well-to-do customer, her reputation grew. Receiving multiple special orders, she made up
When she returned to the apartment, she was thankful to find it empty. How could he change so quickly? Laughing one second, terrified the next? Was there some violence in him that could be directed toward her? He had moods, of course, but was never argumentative or the least threatening. Lily drew up her knees and, with her elbows leaning on them, pondered her confusion and his, the future she wanted and the question of whether he could share it. Dawn light seeped through the curtains before he returned. Lily’s heart jumped when she heard the key turn in the lock, but he was calm and, as he put it, “beat up with shame.”
“Was it something to do with your time in Korea that spooked you?” Lily had never asked about the war and he had never brought it up. Good, she had thought. Better to move on.
Frank smiled. “My time?”
“Well, you know what I mean.”
“Yeah, I know. It won’t happen again. Promise.” Frank enclosed her in his arms.
Things went back to normal. He worked at a car wash in the afternoons, she at Wang’s weekdays and doing alterations on Saturdays. They did less and less socializing, but Lily didn’t miss it. The occasional movie was enough until they sat through
He Ran All the Way
. Afterward Frank spent part of the night clenching his fist in silence. There were no more movies.
Lily’s sights were set elsewhere. Little by little she was being singled out for her sewing skills. Twice she had made lace for a bridal veil and, after embroidering a linen tablecloth at the request of a well-to-do customer, her reputation grew. Receiving multiple special orders, she made up
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