Read Online Holy Smokes by Katie MacAlister - Free Book Online Page B
Authors: Katie MacAlister
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let something like a deranged Guardian ruin my day.”
“Sooo many things I could say to that,” Jim said, shaking its head. “I’ll confine myself to pointing out that even if I found the spot, it wouldn’t do you any good.”
“It wouldn’t? Why not?”
Inside my head, a dark, sinuous voice whistled a peppy little tune.
I ground my teeth. “Don’t tell me—I’d have to use the dark power in order to push us through.”
“Yup.”
Smirk.
“Bloody he—Drake!”
“Aisling?” I held the phone away from my ear at the sound of Drake’s roar.
“Hi, sweetie. Um. I guess we’re even on the whole jilting-at-the-altar thing, huh?”
“Where are you? Where have you been? Why have you not answered my calls?” Drake growled. “Rene and your uncle said you just disappeared on the street. Have you been harmed?”
“I’m fine. Jim’s here with me. I’m in…er…oh, hell.”
“Abaddon,” Jim corrected.
I sighed. “I’m in Abaddon. Apparently the woman I bumped into on the street outside the bridal shop wasn’t an innocent tourist. She flashed some sort of a ward on me, and whammo! I found myself here. No, I’m not hurt, just a bit shaky, with a horrifying tendency to wring my hands, but we won’t go into that little problem now. I’m really, really sorry I missed the wedding. Were people upset? Maybe if I apologize to them, they won’t be too pissed with us.”
Drake took a long breath and said in a voice that had me flinching, “The only person you need worry about pacifying at this moment is me.”
“Well, I’ll start the pacifying as soon as I get home. As I remember, the physical extension of this house into our reality is in Islington. I’ll call a cab and be home soon.”
“You will do nothing of the kind. Do not move from that house until I arrive.”
“I am perfectly capable of ordering a cab and getting myself home—”
“Do not argue with me about this, Aisling,” he said somewhat snappishly. I wanted to point out that my experience today was no more my fault than him being arrested the day before, but upon consideration of the last few hours he’d probably gone through, I decided the best tactic was to appease.
“All right. We’ll wait here. But I’m through with trying to have a wedding. We’re going to find the nearest registry office and get it done that way.”
“We will talk about that later. Do not leave the house!”
He hung up after delivering a few more orders, which I naturally dismissed as not being pertinent to the situation.
“I hate it when Drake goes all bossy,” I muttered, glaring at the room in general.
“Like you’re not the queen of ordering people and incredibly handsome Newfies around? Ew. Morning sickness?” Jim asked as it moved around a damp spot on the floor.
“You know full well I haven’t had any morning sickness. It’s one reason why I think Drake is a bit premature with all the baby talk.”
“Your denial of the obvious, while generally amusing, isn’t the issue here, chicky.”
“Oh, stop with the baby innuendoes already! Is there anything I can do to keep from being banished to Abaddon by any passing Guardian?”
“Is there anything that you as a Guardian can do to keep a demon lord from being banished?” Jim asked.
I pointed a finger at it. “I also hate it when you do that.”
“Why?” it asked, tipping its head to the side.
“Argh!”
“Heh heh heh. Hey! What are you doing with those scissors? All right, all right! I’d answer your question if I could, but I’m not a Guardian. You are, so you should know!”
I set down the scissors, frowning in thought. “It’s even more annoying when you’re right.”
“Just tryin’ to help, babe.”
“Uh-huh. As I’m sure you well know, there isn’t anything I can think of that would keep a being of Abaddon from being banished. I suppose I could ask Nora, but I doubt if she’d answer any technical questions since it would probably violate all sorts of
“Sooo many things I could say to that,” Jim said, shaking its head. “I’ll confine myself to pointing out that even if I found the spot, it wouldn’t do you any good.”
“It wouldn’t? Why not?”
Inside my head, a dark, sinuous voice whistled a peppy little tune.
I ground my teeth. “Don’t tell me—I’d have to use the dark power in order to push us through.”
“Yup.”
Smirk.
“Bloody he—Drake!”
“Aisling?” I held the phone away from my ear at the sound of Drake’s roar.
“Hi, sweetie. Um. I guess we’re even on the whole jilting-at-the-altar thing, huh?”
“Where are you? Where have you been? Why have you not answered my calls?” Drake growled. “Rene and your uncle said you just disappeared on the street. Have you been harmed?”
“I’m fine. Jim’s here with me. I’m in…er…oh, hell.”
“Abaddon,” Jim corrected.
I sighed. “I’m in Abaddon. Apparently the woman I bumped into on the street outside the bridal shop wasn’t an innocent tourist. She flashed some sort of a ward on me, and whammo! I found myself here. No, I’m not hurt, just a bit shaky, with a horrifying tendency to wring my hands, but we won’t go into that little problem now. I’m really, really sorry I missed the wedding. Were people upset? Maybe if I apologize to them, they won’t be too pissed with us.”
Drake took a long breath and said in a voice that had me flinching, “The only person you need worry about pacifying at this moment is me.”
“Well, I’ll start the pacifying as soon as I get home. As I remember, the physical extension of this house into our reality is in Islington. I’ll call a cab and be home soon.”
“You will do nothing of the kind. Do not move from that house until I arrive.”
“I am perfectly capable of ordering a cab and getting myself home—”
“Do not argue with me about this, Aisling,” he said somewhat snappishly. I wanted to point out that my experience today was no more my fault than him being arrested the day before, but upon consideration of the last few hours he’d probably gone through, I decided the best tactic was to appease.
“All right. We’ll wait here. But I’m through with trying to have a wedding. We’re going to find the nearest registry office and get it done that way.”
“We will talk about that later. Do not leave the house!”
He hung up after delivering a few more orders, which I naturally dismissed as not being pertinent to the situation.
“I hate it when Drake goes all bossy,” I muttered, glaring at the room in general.
“Like you’re not the queen of ordering people and incredibly handsome Newfies around? Ew. Morning sickness?” Jim asked as it moved around a damp spot on the floor.
“You know full well I haven’t had any morning sickness. It’s one reason why I think Drake is a bit premature with all the baby talk.”
“Your denial of the obvious, while generally amusing, isn’t the issue here, chicky.”
“Oh, stop with the baby innuendoes already! Is there anything I can do to keep from being banished to Abaddon by any passing Guardian?”
“Is there anything that you as a Guardian can do to keep a demon lord from being banished?” Jim asked.
I pointed a finger at it. “I also hate it when you do that.”
“Why?” it asked, tipping its head to the side.
“Argh!”
“Heh heh heh. Hey! What are you doing with those scissors? All right, all right! I’d answer your question if I could, but I’m not a Guardian. You are, so you should know!”
I set down the scissors, frowning in thought. “It’s even more annoying when you’re right.”
“Just tryin’ to help, babe.”
“Uh-huh. As I’m sure you well know, there isn’t anything I can think of that would keep a being of Abaddon from being banished. I suppose I could ask Nora, but I doubt if she’d answer any technical questions since it would probably violate all sorts of
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