Read Online Fried Green Tomatoes at the Whistle Stop Cafe by Fannie Flagg - Free Book Online
Authors: Fannie Flagg
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clean, cool air, high above the earth. The sweet, pure air of freedom.
No, it wasn’t death she was afraid of. It was this life of hers that was beginning to remind her of that gray intensive care waiting room.
MAY 16, 1934
Gopher Bite Report
Bertha Vick reported that Friday night, at about 2 A.M. in the morning, she went to the bathroom and was bitten by a gopher rat that had come up through the pipes and into her toilet. She said she ran and woke up Harold, who did not believe her, but he went in and looked, and sure enough, there it was swimming around in the toilet.
My other half said that the floods must have been the reason it came up through the pipes. Bertha said she did not care what caused it, that she would always be sure to look before she sat down anywhere.
Harold is having the gopher rat stuffed.
Was anybody else’s light bill high this month? Mine was very high, which I think is strange, but my other half was off for a week, fishing with his brother Alton, and he is the one who always leaves the lights on. Let me know.
By the way, Essie Rue has a job over in Birmingham, playing the Protective Life organ for the “Protective Life Insurance Company Radio Show” on W.A.P.I., so be sure and listen.
… Dot Weems …
JANUARY 19, 1986
Mrs. Threadgoode guessed that Evelyn hadn’t come out to the nursing home that Sunday, and she was taking a walk on the side corridor, where they keep the walkers and the wheelchairs. As she turned the corner, there was Evelyn, sitting all by herself in one of the wheelchairs, eating a Baby Ruth candy bar, with big tears streaming down her face. Mrs. Threadgoode went over to her.
“Honey, what in the world is the matter?”
Evelyn glanced up at Mrs. Threadgoode and said, “I don’t know,” and continued to cry and eat her candy.
“Come on, honey, get your purse, let’s walk a little.” Mrs. Threadgoode took her hand and pulled her up from the chair, and began to walk her up the corridor and back.
“Now, tell me, honey, what is it? What’s the matter? What are you so sad over?”
Evelyn said, “I don’t know,” and burst into tears all over again.
“Oh sugar, things cain’t be all that bad. Let’s start one by one, and you tell me some of the things that are bothering you.”
“Well … it just seems like since my children went off to college, I just feel useless.”
Mrs. Threadgoode said, “That’s perfectly understandable, honey, everybody goes through that.”
Evelyn continued, “And … and I just cain’t seem to stop eating. I’ve tried and tried, every day I wake up and think that today I’m gonna stay on my diet, and every day I go off. I hide candy bars all over the house and in the garage. I don’t know what’s the matter with me.”
Mrs. Threadgoode said, “Well, honey, a candy bar’s not gonna hurt you.”
Evelyn said, “One’s all right; not six or eight. I just wish I had the guts to get really fat and be done with it, or to have the willpower to lose weight and be really thin. I just feel stuck … stuck right in the middle. Women’s lib came too late for me … I was already married with two children when I found out that I didn’t have to get married. I thought you had to. What did I know? And now it’s too late to change … I feel like life has just passed me by.” Then she turned to Mrs. Threadgoode, tears still running down her face. “Oh Mrs. Threadgoode, I’m too young to be old and too old to be young. I just don’t fit anywhere. I wish I could kill myself, but I don’t have the courage.”
Mrs. Threadgoode was appalled. “Why, Evelyn Couch, you mustn’t even think such a thing. That’s like sticking a sword in the side of Jesus! That’s just silly talk, honey—you’ve just got to pull yourself together and open your heart to the Lord. He’ll help you. Now, let me ask you this. Are your breasts sore?”
Evelyn looked at her. “Well, sometimes.”
“Does your back and legs
No, it wasn’t death she was afraid of. It was this life of hers that was beginning to remind her of that gray intensive care waiting room.
MAY 16, 1934
Gopher Bite Report
Bertha Vick reported that Friday night, at about 2 A.M. in the morning, she went to the bathroom and was bitten by a gopher rat that had come up through the pipes and into her toilet. She said she ran and woke up Harold, who did not believe her, but he went in and looked, and sure enough, there it was swimming around in the toilet.
My other half said that the floods must have been the reason it came up through the pipes. Bertha said she did not care what caused it, that she would always be sure to look before she sat down anywhere.
Harold is having the gopher rat stuffed.
Was anybody else’s light bill high this month? Mine was very high, which I think is strange, but my other half was off for a week, fishing with his brother Alton, and he is the one who always leaves the lights on. Let me know.
By the way, Essie Rue has a job over in Birmingham, playing the Protective Life organ for the “Protective Life Insurance Company Radio Show” on W.A.P.I., so be sure and listen.
… Dot Weems …
JANUARY 19, 1986
Mrs. Threadgoode guessed that Evelyn hadn’t come out to the nursing home that Sunday, and she was taking a walk on the side corridor, where they keep the walkers and the wheelchairs. As she turned the corner, there was Evelyn, sitting all by herself in one of the wheelchairs, eating a Baby Ruth candy bar, with big tears streaming down her face. Mrs. Threadgoode went over to her.
“Honey, what in the world is the matter?”
Evelyn glanced up at Mrs. Threadgoode and said, “I don’t know,” and continued to cry and eat her candy.
“Come on, honey, get your purse, let’s walk a little.” Mrs. Threadgoode took her hand and pulled her up from the chair, and began to walk her up the corridor and back.
“Now, tell me, honey, what is it? What’s the matter? What are you so sad over?”
Evelyn said, “I don’t know,” and burst into tears all over again.
“Oh sugar, things cain’t be all that bad. Let’s start one by one, and you tell me some of the things that are bothering you.”
“Well … it just seems like since my children went off to college, I just feel useless.”
Mrs. Threadgoode said, “That’s perfectly understandable, honey, everybody goes through that.”
Evelyn continued, “And … and I just cain’t seem to stop eating. I’ve tried and tried, every day I wake up and think that today I’m gonna stay on my diet, and every day I go off. I hide candy bars all over the house and in the garage. I don’t know what’s the matter with me.”
Mrs. Threadgoode said, “Well, honey, a candy bar’s not gonna hurt you.”
Evelyn said, “One’s all right; not six or eight. I just wish I had the guts to get really fat and be done with it, or to have the willpower to lose weight and be really thin. I just feel stuck … stuck right in the middle. Women’s lib came too late for me … I was already married with two children when I found out that I didn’t have to get married. I thought you had to. What did I know? And now it’s too late to change … I feel like life has just passed me by.” Then she turned to Mrs. Threadgoode, tears still running down her face. “Oh Mrs. Threadgoode, I’m too young to be old and too old to be young. I just don’t fit anywhere. I wish I could kill myself, but I don’t have the courage.”
Mrs. Threadgoode was appalled. “Why, Evelyn Couch, you mustn’t even think such a thing. That’s like sticking a sword in the side of Jesus! That’s just silly talk, honey—you’ve just got to pull yourself together and open your heart to the Lord. He’ll help you. Now, let me ask you this. Are your breasts sore?”
Evelyn looked at her. “Well, sometimes.”
“Does your back and legs
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