Fifty Shades of Grey Tentacles
again, or even if I'd ever see
him again. Morris led me to the car on the gravel drive and before
I got in, I turned to him and asked,
    “Morris, how many BDSM submissive's has Grey
had before me?”
    Morris thought for a few moments, and then
started counting on his fingers, and by the time he began using his
second hand, I couldn't take it anymore and told him to stop,
    “You don't really have to tell me! Couldn't
you just have said something like “Oh, a few, but he was never like
this with the others”, or “It is beyond my ken to be able to give
you that information Miss. James.”
    “But you asked me!” argued Morris,
confused.
    “Just because a woman asks you something, it
doesn't mean she wants the truth if the truth might be something
she doesn't like!”
    Morris scratched his head looking
bewildered,
    “I'm so glad I'm gay.” He finally said,
helping me into the car.
    Morris waved me off as the limo pulled away,
and I looked out through the back window as Grey Mansion faded into
the distance, with the wind in the trees forcing the branches to
submit to its dominance. The car took an unusual route back to my
campus, and I knocked on the partition between me and the driver so
he'd roll it down, so that I could speak to him. The driver was
wearing his black cap and suit as before, but I sensed something
different about him.
    “Driver, where are we going, this doesn't
look like the right route at all.”
    He answered, but his voice was low, and he
didn't turn back to look at me,
    “Don't worry about it.” He said, “Just sit
back in the car and enjoy the ride.”
    “Look... ” I said, feeling a little annoyed
as I might miss my ten o'clock class, “can you just drive along the
normal route?”
    “Shut-up Miss. James.”
    “What did you say to me!?”
    It was then that he turned to face me, and I
got the shock of my life. Before me was a deeply scarred face, with
a cynical grin.
    “Who are you?” I asked, shocked.
    “They call me Mr. Irony. And you are now my
prisoner Elle James.”
    “I don't want to be your prisoner, I don't
have a contract with you!”
    “Oh, like I really care .” He said,
sarcasm oozing from his voice.
    “What are you going to do with me? Why are
you kidnapping me?”
    “Because you are just so useful to me.
Mr. Grey will now come to rescue you, because you're really
special to him. And then I will trap him and then destroy him
Miss. James.”
    “But Mr. Grey is just a billionaire Candy
magnate, he can't rescue me.”
    “Oh you're really intelligent aren't
you? You know so much about Mr. Grey don't you.”
    I became so scared and began to shout and
scream,
    “Let me out, let me out!”
    I tried the doors and they were all locked, I
kicked at the windows but the glass would not break, but
unfortunately one of my high-heels did, and I cursed, knowing I'd
never find a pair like that again as they were last season's
colors.
    “I'm so not going to have sex with you
later.” He said, in a way that quite obviously meant he was.
    The thought of ironic sex filled me with
horror, what would it entail? Would it actually mean he'd have sex
with me and say things like “Oh, you're so tight.”, or “I'm really hot for you right now.” as he was
penetrating me. Or, bearing in mind it would be ironic sex, did it
mean that he'd not actually have sex with me, but cause me pain and
suffering, somewhat like sadomasochistic sex?
    “I'm trapped, I'm trapped!” I screamed again,
hoping a passer-by on the street would hear me.
    “ Oh , the irony of it all.” He said
gleefully, “A BDSM submissive trapped and unable to escape!”
    And then he laughed an insane laugh, much
worse than anything The Count had ever come up with. I went to try
and attack him with my tiara, and then thought better of it - not
wanting it damaged - and I was too late anyway, as the window
rolled up and he cackled,
    “Say goodnight Miss. James.”
    Gas began to fill the back of the car and I
felt woozy and

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