Read Online Exploits by Mike Resnick - Free Book Online Page A

Doctor Ho is planning the conquest of the entire world!”
    Doctor Ho turned and stared at Sir Mortimer for a minute. “More groundless accusations, Sir Mortimer?” he said.
    “Microdots!” shouted Sir Mortimer suddenly. “That's it! He's hidden microdots on the dragon's scales!”
    Doctor Ho shook his head sadly. “Poor deluded man.”
    “That's got to be the answer!” persisted Sir Mortimer. “We've searched everywhere else. Somewhere on that dragon's skin are some microdots that Doctor Ho is selling to our enemies in Europe. Probably the position of the Pacific Fleet!”
    “If I let you examine every inch of my dragon, will that finally satisfy you, Sir Mortimer?” asked Doctor Ho.
    “You haven't got the nerve!” said Sir Mortimer. “You know I'll find what I'm looking for!”
    Doctor Ho turned to his men. “Make Sir Mortimer comfortable for the night, and when we ship the dragon tomorrow morning, make sure that Sir Mortimer accompanies him.” He walked over to Sir Mortimer. “It will take approximately seven weeks for the dragon to reach its destination. You will be given free access to him all the way there and all the way back.”
    His men started dragging Sir Mortimer off.
    “Well, that rids me of his unpleasant presence for the next few months,” said Dr. Ho, as he began walking back to his fortress.
    “Hey!” I said. “What about me ?”
    “What about you?” asked Doctor Ho.
    “I thought we were gonna talk a little business,” I said.
    “I don't believe we shall,” said Doctor Ho.
    “Why the hell not?” I demanded. “I took your side, didn't I?”
    “The alternative would have been a swift and painful death.”
    “What's that got to do with anything?”
    “Reverend Jones,” he said, “you are perhaps the only man of my acquaintance with even less regard for the laws and morals of society than I myself possess. While I do not necessarily consider that a failing, it does make it difficult for me to trust you.”
    “Well, as I see it, Doctor Ho, you got two choices,” I told him. “You can take me on as a partner, or have me as an enemy. Now, if we was to become partners and you really do take over the world, you could give me a little chunk of it, like say, Australia, and we could plunder it six ways to Sunday and split the take right down the middle. If, on the other hand, you decide you'd rather have me as an enemy, you're not only taking on me but the Lord as well, and take my word for it, the Lord can whip you in straight falls without working up much of a sweat.”
    “There is a third alternative, you know,” he said.
    “Yeah? What is that?”
    He pulled out a little pearl-handled revolver. “I can kill you right here and now.”
    Which, in my eagerness for gainful employment, was an alternative I had plumb forgotten to take into account.
    “You look pale, Reverend Jones,” said Doctor Ho. “And your knees are starting to shake. I fear you must be coming down with fever.”
    “Well, maybe I'll just mosey back into Peking and lie down for a week or two,” I suggested hopefully.
    He nodded. “It would be best.” He reached out a bony hand and took mine in it. “Let us part friends, Reverend Jones.”
    “That suits me more and more as I come to think on it,” I said sincerely.
    “I am glad to have had this little chat with you,” he continued. “You are a most interesting man. I have the distinct feeling that our paths will cross again.”
    “You do?”
    “Yes. And next time the outcome may not be so pleasant.”
    “You still plan to conquer the world?”
    “That is a very indiscreet question, Reverend Jones,” he said. “Let me answer it this way: whatever my plans may be, Sir Mortimer will never thwart them again.”
    “You mean there ain't nothing hidden on the dragon or in his cage?” I said.
    “That is correct.”
    “Then how come Sir Mortimer is dead convinced that you're smuggling something out every time you ship the dragon?”
    “Sir Mortimer