Read Online Delilah's Diary #1: A Sexy Journey by Jasinda Wilder - Free Book Online Page A

lingerie I'd indulged in for fun before I left Chicago, and was wearing them because they made me feel sexy and daring. Would he see them? The thought of standing in my bra and panties in front of a man was scary. I'd never done it before. That's not how things were with Harry. We had sex in bed, with the lights out. I'd never stood before a man in any state of undress, not intentionally. Oh, sure, Harry saw me naked all the time, just out of the shower, or changing, but...
    God, as I write this I realize the hard truth: Harry didn't want me. He didn't desire me. I was safe, for him. I was security. I had a career path and I took care of him. But sexually, I was just there. Available, but not his preference.
    Luca...he wanted me. It was in his eyes, in the roving possession of his hand, the bump of his hips against mine. His desire was infectious, and intoxicating.
    I'd never been desired before.
    I needed to show Luca that I wanted him too. I brushed my hands up his torso, along his sides, and lifted his shirt off. Holy hell. His body was chiseled from flesh-covered granite. My lips, of their own free will, touched his shoulder, an inch away from his neck, and then closed in to where his throat met his clavicle, and then to his adam's apple.
    I'd never kissed a man, thus, with such tender passion. I didn't love Luca, but I wanted him, in a way I'd never wanted anyone.
    Luca kissed my temple, feathered his fingers through my hair as I paid oral homage to the temple of his body, then skimmed his hands up my back and lifted my shirt free, and my thudding heart went mad.
    "Your heart, it is beating so hard," Luca laughed. He tipped my chin up to look at him. "You are not only nervous, I think. You are afraid. Am I scaring you, Delilah?"
    I shook my head, then nodded, and then laughed at my indecision, sniffling. I wasn't crying. I wasn't .
    Shit. Yes I was.
    (Cursing comes easier with every passing day; in writing, it is even easier. No one will ever read this diary.)
    "Delilah? Mio Dios, you are crying. It was too much, I knew it." He sat me down on my bed, pulled me against his chest.
    I was in my skirt and bra, but he hadn't so much as peeked at me, yet. This just made me cry harder.
    "I'm sorry, Luca," I whispered, choking back the crazy, unwelcome, confused tears. "It's not you. I don't know what it is. I was enjoying it, really I was. I don't want to stop. I don't know why I am crying."
    "Tell me, mia bella. What is it you are trying to forget?"
    I shook my head. "No. No drama." I wiped my eyes, took shallow shuddering breaths.
    And then Luca, sweet, sexy Luca, he kissed my hair line, and then my temple, and then my cheekbone, and then my jaw, and it was as if I'd always known him, always felt his kisses on my face. So familiar, so foreign; so electric, so comforting.
    It only made another tear track down my face, and then I was talking. Again. Telling my stupid story, again. I had it down to a quick run-through at this point, an almost memorized patter of the facts: small town girl married her high school sweetheart, found him cheating on her and left him.
    "But then why are you so afraid of this?" Luca asked. "You are not a virgin, it is not your first time, nor mine. I am not hurting you, am I? Not giving you pressure to do this?"
    "No! Like I said, it's not you, not in any way. It's just...Harry, my ex-husband, was the only one I've ever been with. And with him, it was always in bed, in the dark. Once we were married—and we waited until we were married for our first time, or I did, at least—there wasn't much romance to it. We barely kissed. He didn't touch me like you are. He just...did what he did, finished, and went to sleep." I couldn't look at Luca as I said this. "I don't know what I'm doing. I don't know anything, except that...I want you. I want this. You...you look at me, touch me like you actually want me, and it—it's so wonderful. But yeah, I'm scared. It's new, and I feel vulnerable. What if I'm bad at