eye shadow and lipstick to match, and how she always looked and smelled divine. She remembered the way the crystal on the set table would sparkle in the candlelight, refracting through the delicate grooves on the expensive and finely crafted glass, saved for special occasions such as these. Gifts of fresh-cut flowers, boxes of chocolates tied with red ribbon and the embarrassment when she and her siblings were paraded proudly, like good children, in front of Mr and Mrs Whoever! Collectively they would smile sweetly in their best pyjamas, dressing gowns and rosy faces, before being marched up the stairs to bed like the essence of innocence, angelic children that they were! And whilst the guests enjoyed their meal there would invariably be a “mission” to the kitchen to retrieve and retreat with pickings of the sumptuous feast that would have taken the whole day to prepare: filled vol-au-vents, salads, succulent beef, crispy roasties dipped in thick gravy, chocolate gateaux, fruit salad, trifle with whipped cream and the ultimate prize – After Eights! What a coup! To creep back upstairs having successfully scored a couple of those wonderful wafer-thin minty chocolate squares was trophy indeed!
“Your father always said his career in the Force was down to those dinner parties!” her mother said, her adult memories very different to Esmée’s. “And despite it all, the ups and downs, we were a great team!” Her tone was upbeat and ceremonious.
They sat for a while, each momentarily lost in their disparate memories of their former years, Esmèe reflecting that her father hadn't in fact advanced much in his career before he was killed. Reluctantly her mother spoke again, breaking the nostalgia of the moment.
“These days promotions happen over a round of golf while in my day it was over a good home-cooked meal surrounded by your happy family. Family values – that’s what counted.” Her tone was firm and authoritative.
“Mum?” Esmée asked nervously. “Why are you telling me this?”
“I’m not sure. Up until now I’ve never really spoken about this to anyone – I haven’t needed to.” She paused, raising her eyebrows in recognition of the extraordinary place in which she now found herself. “I suppose what I’m trying to say is that maybe you need to try and understand why he’s behaving like this. Talk to him. Tell him how you feel. You can’t give up on your marriage.”
“Did you say that to Tom when he walked out on Rachel?” The question, oozing with sharp bitterness, escaped unchecked.
Her mother’s face reddened as she hastily replied. “Your brother’s situation is different.”
“How so?”
“You’ll have to ask him that.”
Esmée asserted there and then that she had made the right decision in not telling her mother of her plans in advance of their implementation. Either Esmée was totally blinkered or her mother genuinely didn’t understand and, while deep down she appreciated the enormity of her mother’s shocking confession and was rocked by the possibility of her father’s indiscretions, she genuinely doubted her dad had ever cheated on her mother. But one thing was pretty clear: Esmée knew why her mother had made the humiliating confession: she wanted her to stay with Philip, because that’s what a good wife does.
Confused, hurt and disappointed, she couldn’t wait to get out of the house but she reluctantly stayed with her mother for a little while longer, to answer her questions about where she was now living, how the children were and how she actually planned to survive financially.
“It won’t last forever, you know, and what will you do then?” Sylvia remarked. She was referring to the money Esmée’s father had left her in his will and which Esmée had put aside for a rainy day – a rainy day that had now clearly arrived.
This final point acted as a full stop to the conversation. It was all a little too much a little too soon for Esmée and,
Victoria Alexander
Sarah Lovett
Jon McGoran
Maya Banks
Stephen Knight
Bree Callahan
Walter J. Boyne
Mike Barry
Kit Tunstall, R.E. Saxton
Richard Montanari