Read Online Corpus Corpus by Harry Paul Jeffers - Free Book Online
Authors: Harry Paul Jeffers
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took his time in drawing a small sheet of paper from his shirt pocket. He read:
"For a giant guzzler of malty brews
Fritz cook'd up possum stews
Or dished him up with equal pace
Shish-ke-bab with thyme and mace.
No turde soup or oyster pie
Beyond Wolfe's ken could lie;
A shad roe dish was always fine
Though a plate of eel was out of line.
Roasted, baked, braised, or boiled
Salted, peppered, or olive-oiled
There was no dinner Wolfe wouldn't eat
As long as it included meat.
So here's to Fritz
Who scorned the Ritz
To get rich in
The West Side kitchen
Of Rex Stout's immortal hero
The hungry Wolfe named Nero."
"Bravo as usual, dear Oscar," exclaimed Henry as drinks were sipped around the room.
Dane sighed. "I'm afraid my toast will pale in comparison."
"You'll do fine," Bogdanovic said. 'Just picture all these people as members of a jury."
"You overlook the fact that my last jury voted to acquit."
"Thanks to Janus's smoke and mirrors," said the judge as he put down his glass of water.
"Mind your manners, Reggie," whispered Pendelton. "The man of the hour is heading this way."
The mellifluous voice preceded him. "Oscar, Oscar! Very well done. What a charming bit of doggerel." Suddenly towering above them, he removed his hat in a broad, sweeping gesture with one hand and with the other set his martini on the table. "I just had to come over here and visit awhile with the three most beautiful ladies in the room. And the handsomest men."
"You're looking fine, Theo," said Marian Pickering Henry.
"Marian, darling. I missed you while you were in London. I assume your little hothouse and all your devoted fans are glad that you're back among them."
"Hello, Theo," said Stamos. "How's the three-million-dollar man this evening?
"Long time no see, Nicky. Ariadne, you are stunning."
"And you know Judge Simmons, of course," said Pendelton.
When the jurist did not rise, Janus said, "I'm afraid His Honor is not one of my fans."
"Oh, everyone loves you, Theo," exclaimed Dane.
Janus bent and planted a kiss on her forehead. "Isn't this just a swell evening, Maggie? I'm thrilled that you are part of it. And I see you have been taken under the protective wing of Sgt. John Bogdanovic of the New York Police Department. Did you know that this is the man whose testimony nearly won it for the district attorney in the Morgan Griffith murder trial? I hope, Sergeant, that you are not a man to nurse hard feelings."
"I'm only upset by injustice, Mr. Janus."
"Where was the injustice? You did your duty on the witness stand and I did mine cross-examining you. How would you have it, Detective? Shall you be old Fury in Alice in Wonderland? I'll be judge and jury and try the case and condemn you to death?"
Retrieving his drink, he turned and strode away so fast that he ran into a waiter and dropped the delicate martini glass. "I'm sorry, sir," gasped the faultless waiter. "I'll get you another."
"Hell yes, boy. With two olives."
As Janus returned to the head table, Bogdanovic regarded the guests at his table. "Sorry. I just don't like that guy."
"Don't apologize, Sergeant," said Simmons as he waved off a waiter who tried to pour a glass of wine for him.
"Chief Goldstein," said Janus, clasping his fresh drink as he resumed his place at the head table, "your able sergeant is a man with forceful opinions forthrightly expressed." 'John's Croatian."
"Yes, that would account for it. The Balkan temperament can be fiery. I could use a man with his passion working for me."
'Johnny Bogdanovic as a private investigator for a defense attorney? I don't think that's in the cards. He's committed to sending murderers to prison."
"Too bad. I like him." He reached for the martini. "I toast to murderers, Chief Harvey Goldstein, Sergeant Johnny Bogdanovic, all others who pursue them, and people like me who do our duty by defending them!"
Goldstein lifted a bottle of beer. "I prefer to drink to the cause of
"For a giant guzzler of malty brews
Fritz cook'd up possum stews
Or dished him up with equal pace
Shish-ke-bab with thyme and mace.
No turde soup or oyster pie
Beyond Wolfe's ken could lie;
A shad roe dish was always fine
Though a plate of eel was out of line.
Roasted, baked, braised, or boiled
Salted, peppered, or olive-oiled
There was no dinner Wolfe wouldn't eat
As long as it included meat.
So here's to Fritz
Who scorned the Ritz
To get rich in
The West Side kitchen
Of Rex Stout's immortal hero
The hungry Wolfe named Nero."
"Bravo as usual, dear Oscar," exclaimed Henry as drinks were sipped around the room.
Dane sighed. "I'm afraid my toast will pale in comparison."
"You'll do fine," Bogdanovic said. 'Just picture all these people as members of a jury."
"You overlook the fact that my last jury voted to acquit."
"Thanks to Janus's smoke and mirrors," said the judge as he put down his glass of water.
"Mind your manners, Reggie," whispered Pendelton. "The man of the hour is heading this way."
The mellifluous voice preceded him. "Oscar, Oscar! Very well done. What a charming bit of doggerel." Suddenly towering above them, he removed his hat in a broad, sweeping gesture with one hand and with the other set his martini on the table. "I just had to come over here and visit awhile with the three most beautiful ladies in the room. And the handsomest men."
"You're looking fine, Theo," said Marian Pickering Henry.
"Marian, darling. I missed you while you were in London. I assume your little hothouse and all your devoted fans are glad that you're back among them."
"Hello, Theo," said Stamos. "How's the three-million-dollar man this evening?
"Long time no see, Nicky. Ariadne, you are stunning."
"And you know Judge Simmons, of course," said Pendelton.
When the jurist did not rise, Janus said, "I'm afraid His Honor is not one of my fans."
"Oh, everyone loves you, Theo," exclaimed Dane.
Janus bent and planted a kiss on her forehead. "Isn't this just a swell evening, Maggie? I'm thrilled that you are part of it. And I see you have been taken under the protective wing of Sgt. John Bogdanovic of the New York Police Department. Did you know that this is the man whose testimony nearly won it for the district attorney in the Morgan Griffith murder trial? I hope, Sergeant, that you are not a man to nurse hard feelings."
"I'm only upset by injustice, Mr. Janus."
"Where was the injustice? You did your duty on the witness stand and I did mine cross-examining you. How would you have it, Detective? Shall you be old Fury in Alice in Wonderland? I'll be judge and jury and try the case and condemn you to death?"
Retrieving his drink, he turned and strode away so fast that he ran into a waiter and dropped the delicate martini glass. "I'm sorry, sir," gasped the faultless waiter. "I'll get you another."
"Hell yes, boy. With two olives."
As Janus returned to the head table, Bogdanovic regarded the guests at his table. "Sorry. I just don't like that guy."
"Don't apologize, Sergeant," said Simmons as he waved off a waiter who tried to pour a glass of wine for him.
"Chief Goldstein," said Janus, clasping his fresh drink as he resumed his place at the head table, "your able sergeant is a man with forceful opinions forthrightly expressed." 'John's Croatian."
"Yes, that would account for it. The Balkan temperament can be fiery. I could use a man with his passion working for me."
'Johnny Bogdanovic as a private investigator for a defense attorney? I don't think that's in the cards. He's committed to sending murderers to prison."
"Too bad. I like him." He reached for the martini. "I toast to murderers, Chief Harvey Goldstein, Sergeant Johnny Bogdanovic, all others who pursue them, and people like me who do our duty by defending them!"
Goldstein lifted a bottle of beer. "I prefer to drink to the cause of
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