Chubby Chaser

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school colors in some way. The faculty would then vote on which class they thought had done the best job and announce the winner at the pep assembly on Friday.
    The seniors’ section was the east wing of the second floor. Andy came up with the idea for the seniors to make posters o f Philippine eagles with blue-and-white plumage plucking the eyes out of black-striped, red (City High’s colors were red and black) Bali tigers to hang on the walls to symbolize the Tallis Eagles’ certain defeat of the City Tigers. According to Andy, the Philippine eagles were the largest birds in the world and one of the most powerful, and the Bali tigers were the smallest extinct tigers. Jason had to hand it to him: Andy was smart as hell, but if he spent less time obsessing about weird shit, such as which was the largest and most powerful eagle and which was the smallest extinct tiger, he wouldn’t still be practically a virgin. All the posters had to do was look cool, not provide a zoology lesson.
     
    The football team had practice every day that week until the big game on Friday against City High (games usually took place on Saturdays, but the homecoming dance would be happening then). During Monday’s football practice, Coach Logan focused on passing plays via a scrimmage (first string versus second string) to help decrease the likelihood that City would gain possession of the ball on account of fumbles and interceptions. He didn’t want to see any fumbles or successful interceptions, and if he did, the entire team would have to run one lap around the football field for every fumble and for every interception. All of the guys—from the running backs to the wide receivers—did a great job, having only one fumble and no interceptions for first string and three fumbles and one interception for second string, but the coach yelled at them all, anyway, and told them they sucked as they ran their mandatory laps. In addition to his harsh criticisms, Coach Logan told them that passing would be the focal point of their practices for the rest of the week until they had no fumbles and no successful interceptions and that he would double the number of laps for each fumble and each interception for each extra day that they had to expend on passing plays because of their screw ups. Rather than demoralize them, the coach’s merciless words and stringent requirements motivated the team to do better and fired them up to tear the heads off the City Tigers come homecoming.
    Jason had added incentive to do better (not that he wasn’t already amazing, because he was): Ben Hoates, the quarterback coach from SCU, was coming to watch him play. With his stats, Jason was pretty much guaranteed a spot for next fall, but winning the homecoming game would make him an even better prospect.
     
    On Tuesday work was started on the float for the homecoming parade. Football players were exempt from building it, as the float was in their honor. Whatever the underclassmen were making, it had better be good. It was Jason’s senior year; it was his last homecoming, and it was the only homecoming where he could be (and would be) homecoming king. He wanted everything to be perfect in every way.
    Somehow Jason and the other football players performed even worse during Tuesday’s practice than they had during Monday’s (first string had four fumbles and one interception during the scrimmage, and second string had seven fumbles and two interceptions), and Coach Logan was not shy about voicing his disappointment.
    “What the hell was that?” the coach spat. The team sat on the bleachers, giving the coach their full attention lest they piss him off any further. “Ya’ll played like a bunch of fags who’ve never even stepped foot on a field. Now, we only have two days of practice left until we play City, and I don’t know about ya’ll, but I like being a winner, and in order for me to keep being a winner, ya’ll have to keep being winners, so fucking get it

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