need anything else mudying the waters. Just stop worrying about it, Sasha! ”
“ It might stop things we haven't done yet. It might tell us— ”
“ It won't. ”
“ It might stop things from going wrong. ”
“ Who said they were going wrong? ”
“ They're not going exactly right, are they? ”
“ Banniks don't like wizards. They don't talk, any more than Babi, any more than the domovoi: they show you things, and they never make sense. ”
“ But if we had the least idea where what we're wishing might take us— ”
“ It never helps. We change things, we're constantly changing things and you can't tell, you can't tell anything by what they say and they don't like it. Papa used to say. ” Every time Eveshka mentioned her father she would frown guardedly and look at him as if she were looking for echoes. ‘‘And we don't need it. ”
“ I still think- ”
“ Our bannik didn't help us. I didn't see what was going to happen to me. We didn't see anything about Kavi Chernevog. ” She never talked about her dying. She scrubbed furiously at the last dish, bit her lip and said, “ I'm sure I'll like the horse. If it makes Pyetr happy, I'm happy. ”
She hardly looked happy. Sasha said: “ Is there some reason not? ”
“ What? ”
“ About the bannik. Is there some reason not to want one? ”
“ It doesn't help. It didn't help, I'm telling you! Why don't you go help Pyetr? ”
“ Eveshka. Why wouldn't you want it here? ”
“ For the god's sake why should I care? Why should I care if we do or if we don't? What's that to do with anything? ”
“ Things just aren't right, ” he said, thinking of the shelf , thinking of—
—the stability of everything. Everything in balance. Chernevog, in the leshys' keeping; Uulamets; all the hundreds of wishes that might be loose about this place and all the dangers for as long as they lived and worked magic here.
“ Things have been perfectly right, ” she said, drying the bowl. ‘‘Things have been perfectly right for years before this, and what you did is done, and there's not a thing we can do that doesn't make a bigger thing of it than it is, so just let it be, Sasha Vasilyevitch, for the god's sake, just forget about it, you're the one who's making an argument out of it. ”
“ I want your help. ”
“ If you want a bannik, if you want a horse and a pig and a goat besides, god, I'm sure I don't care. It's your house. ”
“ It's not my house. ”
“ I 'm sure papa intended it. ”
“ Your father gave me the book. Nothing else. ”
A spoon clattered onto the counter. “ Papa gave you a lot else. ”
There was long silence.
“ Not as much as you imagine, ” he said. He had been wanting to say it for years. He had tried to say it that way for years. But it fell short, he saw the set of her chin. “ You don't know what I imagine. ”
“ Eveshka, ” he said, treading further and further onto dangerous ground, “ Eveshka, you don't want me here, do you? Not really. ”
“ I never said I didn't want you here. I don't want you here now, that's all, I don't want you in my kitchen and I don't want to talk about that damned horse. I'm sick of talking about the horse! ”
“ You’re mad at me. ”
“ I 'm not mad at you! ” She flung down the dishtowel. ’‘You're being stupid, Sasha Vasilyevitch, I don't know what put this idea of a bannik into your head, but you're acting the fool—you've been acting the fool for a month, and I wish you'd stop it! If you want a bannik, wish up a bannik, wish up whatever you like. ”
“ That's what I'm worried about, ” he said. He wanted her to know he was confused, and scared, because he was not her father, he was not even sure he knew what her father would have wished except to keep them out from under the same roof, and he did not even know if it was his idea to leave the house and live elsewhere Or if it was Uulamets'.
That set Eveshka off her balance. She wanted him outside,
“ It might stop things we haven't done yet. It might tell us— ”
“ It won't. ”
“ It might stop things from going wrong. ”
“ Who said they were going wrong? ”
“ They're not going exactly right, are they? ”
“ Banniks don't like wizards. They don't talk, any more than Babi, any more than the domovoi: they show you things, and they never make sense. ”
“ But if we had the least idea where what we're wishing might take us— ”
“ It never helps. We change things, we're constantly changing things and you can't tell, you can't tell anything by what they say and they don't like it. Papa used to say. ” Every time Eveshka mentioned her father she would frown guardedly and look at him as if she were looking for echoes. ‘‘And we don't need it. ”
“ I still think- ”
“ Our bannik didn't help us. I didn't see what was going to happen to me. We didn't see anything about Kavi Chernevog. ” She never talked about her dying. She scrubbed furiously at the last dish, bit her lip and said, “ I'm sure I'll like the horse. If it makes Pyetr happy, I'm happy. ”
She hardly looked happy. Sasha said: “ Is there some reason not? ”
“ What? ”
“ About the bannik. Is there some reason not to want one? ”
“ It doesn't help. It didn't help, I'm telling you! Why don't you go help Pyetr? ”
“ Eveshka. Why wouldn't you want it here? ”
“ For the god's sake why should I care? Why should I care if we do or if we don't? What's that to do with anything? ”
“ Things just aren't right, ” he said, thinking of the shelf , thinking of—
—the stability of everything. Everything in balance. Chernevog, in the leshys' keeping; Uulamets; all the hundreds of wishes that might be loose about this place and all the dangers for as long as they lived and worked magic here.
“ Things have been perfectly right, ” she said, drying the bowl. ‘‘Things have been perfectly right for years before this, and what you did is done, and there's not a thing we can do that doesn't make a bigger thing of it than it is, so just let it be, Sasha Vasilyevitch, for the god's sake, just forget about it, you're the one who's making an argument out of it. ”
“ I want your help. ”
“ If you want a bannik, if you want a horse and a pig and a goat besides, god, I'm sure I don't care. It's your house. ”
“ It's not my house. ”
“ I 'm sure papa intended it. ”
“ Your father gave me the book. Nothing else. ”
A spoon clattered onto the counter. “ Papa gave you a lot else. ”
There was long silence.
“ Not as much as you imagine, ” he said. He had been wanting to say it for years. He had tried to say it that way for years. But it fell short, he saw the set of her chin. “ You don't know what I imagine. ”
“ Eveshka, ” he said, treading further and further onto dangerous ground, “ Eveshka, you don't want me here, do you? Not really. ”
“ I never said I didn't want you here. I don't want you here now, that's all, I don't want you in my kitchen and I don't want to talk about that damned horse. I'm sick of talking about the horse! ”
“ You’re mad at me. ”
“ I 'm not mad at you! ” She flung down the dishtowel. ’‘You're being stupid, Sasha Vasilyevitch, I don't know what put this idea of a bannik into your head, but you're acting the fool—you've been acting the fool for a month, and I wish you'd stop it! If you want a bannik, wish up a bannik, wish up whatever you like. ”
“ That's what I'm worried about, ” he said. He wanted her to know he was confused, and scared, because he was not her father, he was not even sure he knew what her father would have wished except to keep them out from under the same roof, and he did not even know if it was his idea to leave the house and live elsewhere Or if it was Uulamets'.
That set Eveshka off her balance. She wanted him outside,
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