Read Online Charm School by Anne Fine - Free Book Online Page B

oil.’
    Bonny was mystified. ‘What’s wrong with that? Olive oil tastes nice. And it’s good for you.’
    ‘It’s a hundred and fifty calories a
table-spoonful
,’ said Cristalle firmly, as if that settled the matter. Simply to keep the peace, Bonny shifted her fork across to her pizza.

    Suki’s mouth dropped open. ‘Are you really going to eat that?’ she couldn’t help asking.
    ‘Yes.’ Bonny stared at her. ‘That’s why I took it.’
    Now everyone was chiming in. ‘
All
of it?
Both slices
?’
    ‘As well as the salad dressing?’
    ‘
Now?
’
    ‘Those croutons look to me as if they’re
fried
,’ added Cristalle, as if the word meant ‘
poisonous
’.
    Bonny tried to ignore them all. Keeping her head well down, she watched the food on their own plates. Toby was right. All that they seemed to do was shuffle it round and round, making a giant great fuss of it, but never actually putting any of it in their mouths. Bonny watched, fascinated, as Esmeralda made a great show of reaching for a slice of bread, then unwrapping her butter pat. It took her twenty times as long as it would have taken Bonny to peel the shiny foil off the tiny yellow square and fold the foil up neatly. Then Esmeralda picked up her knife and started to mash the butter on her plate.
    ‘What are you doing?’
    ‘Just softening the butter.’

    ‘Why?’
    ‘It spreads better,’ said Esmeralda.
    And thinner, too. Bonny watched Esmeralda smear the tiniest fraction of butter onto her bread, and make a great display of spreading it around, though there was so little of it, it was practically invisible.
    ‘Aren’t you using the rest up?’
    ‘Gosh, no.’ Esmeralda looked horrified. ‘This is
tons
.’
    She still wasn’t actually eating it, Bonny noticed. Now she was neatly cutting the slice into quarters. And, after that, each quarter into strips. And then she trimmed each crust off, one by one. Anyone glancing her way would be left with the impression that she was bent over her plate tucking in happily. But she still hadn’t eaten anything.
    Bonny leaned over the table and tapped her fork beside Esmeralda’s plate. In a nannyish voice, she said to her, ‘Stop playing with your food, dear!’
    Esmeralda looked up, startled. ‘What do you mean?’
    ‘Just what I say,’ said Bonny, still in her nanny voice. ‘Stop messing, and eat it.’
    ‘I
am
eating,’ said Esmeralda.
    ‘No, you’re not,’ Bonny said, going back to her normal voice to explain what she meant. ‘What you’re doing is shunting and mashing and smearing and slicing. But you’re not actually
eating
anything. So, apart from the fact that you’re doing it so daintily, you’re just messing with your food like a giant great baby.’
    Esmeralda went scarlet. ‘I am not! I
am
eating. I have eaten
tons
.’
    ‘
What
? Tell us
what
.’
    ‘I ate most of the lettuce. And the fishcake. And the beans.’
    ‘You didn’t eat the fishcake,’ Suki said. ‘You hid it under the lettuce. With the beans.’
    Bonny reached over and lifted Esmeralda’s lettuce with her fork. Esmeralda blushed as the evidence was displayed around the table. But several of the others were blushing too. Bonny turned to her right and lifted Amethyst’s largest lettuce leaf with the fork. Out peeped two fish fingers and some mushrooms. She turned to her left, and Serena snatched her plate away.
    ‘It’s none of your business!’
    ‘You have to eat,’ said Bonny. ‘If you don’t eat, your brain doesn’t work properly, and you get all tearful and crabby.’
    There was a whisper further up the table, and everyone giggled.
    ‘What was that?’ asked Bonny.
    ‘Nothing,’ said Sarajane. ‘Angelica just made a little joke, that’s all.’
    ‘What did you say?’ Bonny asked Angelica.
    ‘Nothing,’ said Angelica.
    ‘No, go on,’ insisted Bonny. ‘Share the joke.’
    ‘I’ve forgotten,’ said Angelica.
    ‘I haven’t,’ said Serena, getting her own back on Angelica for