Read Online Cervena by Louise Lyons - Free Book Online Page B

my hands. I couldn’t think about Sasha now.
    “How long has it been?” Rosalyn asked.
    “Two hours.” Steve shuffled in his seat. “Either of you want coffee?”
    “No thanks, love. I need to stretch my legs.” Rosalyn got to her feet.
    “I don’t either.” I straightened up and dragged my fingers through my hair. “Why don’t you both go for a walk? I’ll call you if there’s any news.”
    They left me alone. I walked around the room a few times, wincing at the pain in my leg. The dash from the plane to the train station hadn’t helped it at all. I sat down again, stretched it out, and lifted my foot onto the small table in front of my chair.
    My sister and Steve returned fifteen minutes later and sat on the sofa again. Steve sipped from the paper cup of coffee he’d brought with him and shuddered. “This stuff is disgusting.”
    The door opened and we all looked up as a surgeon clad in green scrubs stepped into the room. She looked serious and sad. She let the door close behind her and clasped her hands together in front of her waist. I scrambled to my feet and met her eyes hopefully, silently begging for a positive outcome just as I knew Rosalyn was doing. Those few seconds before the surgeon opened her mouth seemed interminable.
    “I’m so sorry. We did everything we could.”
    Rosalyn let out a wail and slumped against Steve. I tried to listen, but with the rushing noise in my ears and the sound of my heart pounding, joined by Rosalyn’s sobs, I only picked up a few words.
    “…Too weak… infarction… so sorry… nothing more we could do….”
    Struggling to breathe, I lowered myself back into the chair before my leg gave way. Mum was gone. It seemed like an awful dream that I would wake up from at any moment.
    Memories raced through my mind, of times when she’d been healthy and strong. She’d been firm but loving, bringing us up alone after Dad passed. I’d been almost old enough to manage on my own, but Rosalyn had been in her early teens. Mum had taken on the role of both parents with determination, pushing aside her own pain to make sure we were okay. She’d held the family together and now she’d left us, far too soon.
    “When can we see her?” Rosalyn asked, her voice shaking and thick with tears.
    “Just give us a little time. Someone will come to you when we’ve made her ready.”
    I grimaced at the thought of them stitching her up, covering the evidence of the surgery with dressings and a sheet, and trying to make her look peaceful so we wouldn’t be too shocked. I rubbed a hand over my face, surprised to find it dry. My throat hurt and my eyes stung but there were no tears. I felt drained.
    Rosalyn was back on the sofa, weeping quietly in Steve’s arms. They had each other and little Rachael, and it made me realize for the first time how alone I was. Thirty-five years old and I had nobody.
     
     
    “JOE, COME on.” Rosalyn grasped my hand and tugged. “We’re going.”
    “Going where?” I heaved myself up and reached for my coat.
    “To say… g-good-bye.”
    I didn’t know how long I’d been sitting there lost in thought. A nurse waited at the door for us, and when we were ready, she led us down a series of corridors to a room where Mum was laid out, exactly as I’d imagined. A white sheet covered her to the neck, her neatly brushed hair framed her ashen face, and her closed eyes and relaxed features made it seem as if she were merely sleeping.
    I stayed by the door while Rosalyn went to Mum’s side, touched her face and held her hand, whispering things to her that were only meant for mother and daughter. Steve stood at my side, head down and face strained. He loved Mum too. She’d welcomed him into the family with open arms and loved him as she would another son.
    When Rosalyn returned to his arms, I slowly approached the bed. Mum looked so calm. I touched her hand, finding her skin cool but not cold. Surely she would wake when I squeezed her fingers, and open