Futureâ had been the original title of the Sex Pistolsâ classic âGod Save the Queen.â Melinda called it the second most powerful punk refrain of all time, after âBomb Mars Now.â
I felt its power then, that was for sure.
When I finally straggled up the driveway, physically and emotionally drained, Dad was waiting for me at the door.
âListen, Leo, before you come in, thereâs something you should know. You made the six oâclock news.â
âOh, God! Did Mom watch it?â
Behind him, I could already see the answer. From our living room carpet rose the upended stern of the sinking Titanic. It was the biggest puzzle my mother owned, a 3-D tour de force of 6,000 pieces, too large to fit on any table in the house.
âHow bad was it?â I asked. âWhat did they show?â
âNot much,â he assured me. âJust a few seconds on how Purge still has what it takes to get people riled up. Then you came busting through the crowd and made a run at the band.â
My heart sank. âCould you hear what I was saying?â
âThere was no audio. But your mom reads lips. Anyway, we didnât figure you were at that press conference for the fine music and genteel company. So? Did you meet him?â
I shook my head. âA bunch of roadies picked me up and threw me in the garbage. I guess they cut to the weather before that part.â I studied my sneakers. âDad, I made a total idiot out of myself.â
He put a sympathetic hand on my shoulder. âLet me buy you a drink.â We went into the kitchen, and he poured a couple of Cokes. âI understand why you went. In your place, I probably would have done the same thing. Heâs your father, after all.â
â Youâre my father,â I retorted. I hadnât planned on making a confession, but once it began, the floodgates opened, and the words came tumbling out. âI didnât go to New York looking for my roots. I went looking for forty thousand dollars.â
Dad stared in shock. âLeo!â
âHe can afford it! Mom never asked him for any child support over the years. This is the least he can do!â
He had no further comment. But I had only to glance at him to put the finishing touches on this perfect day. It was plain to see by his sorrowful expression that I had disappointed the only father who mattered.
âDonât look at me like that,â I mumbled.
âI wonât stop you,â he told me sadly, âbecause thereâs no way I can lay my hands on that kind of money. I talked to a mortgage broker, and he said the most we could squeeze out of the house was another twenty. We can come up with the rest, but not in time for September. Maybe not even by next September.â He took a deep breath. âIt doesnât exactly feel great for me, either. To know that I canât provide for my son, so he has to go chasing after a total strangerââ
âDad!â I was horrified. âNobody blames you! How many people could pull forty grand out of a hat?â
He made no reply, but the answer, though unspoken, hovered in the air between us: Wall Street guys could. This Harvard thing had Dad questioning his decision to quit his high-stress job and buy the hardware store. And rock starsâthey had piles of money.
I realized that the shadow of Marion X. McMurphy hung over Dadâs life just as much as my own. Maybe even more so, considering the circumstances. To have me suddenly pursuing my biological father now , sixteen years after Purge had left the spotlight, had to hurt. Iâd just poured salt in that wound.
âWell, youâve got nothing to worry about.â It was all the comfort I could offer. âThey wouldnât even let me talk to him.â
But that wasnât the point, and we both knew it.
[9]
THE DEFINITION OF âGET A LIFEâ: Fleming Norwood phoning me six days before the end of
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