have any money in her wallet. Worse â since they were on such a tight budget and sheâd never had to account for every pound so stringently before â she wasnât even sure how sheâd manage to pay Aaron this month.
âIâve got it,â said Vanessa, touching her arm. She delved inside her handbag for her purse and Laura flushed as she realized her mother had noticed her agitation.
Autumn hasnât told her , Laura thought, as she watched Vanessa. Thank God.
The child slid past them and disappeared up the stairs, switching on lights as she went. Laura wanted to rush after her, but she felt compelled to stay as her mother handed Aaron some notes. They both walked him down the stairs to the hall.
After heâd put his coat on, Aaron said, âActually, Iâd prefer to go out the back. Iâd like to go home through the nature reserve. It looks as if the rain is beginning to clear up.â
âOf course,â said Laura, and led the way down to the kitchen. She opened the door and said, âIâll come with you. Thereâs a key code on the gate. You need it to get out.â
âDonât trouble yourself,â said Aaron. âYouâll get cold. And you havenât got any shoes on.â
Laura hesitated and then said, âItâs 2003.â
Aaron said, âThe year Autumn was born? You should change that to something more secure. Iâll make sure the gateâs closed properly.â
He smiled at her and stepped out into the night. Laura, watching him vanish into the darkness, wondered if heâd call her, if perhaps he might come around and drink red wine and black coffee and talk to her about the planets.
Vanessa raised an eyebrow at her as Laura locked the kitchen door.
âHeâs into astronomy,â she explained. âHe wants to do a bit of star-gazing on his way home.â
They waited at the window until they heard the gate click shut and then Vanessa said, âAutumnâs very tired, poor dear. Unsurprisingly. As must you be. Thereâs pizza for you. We thought you would be starving by now.â
Laura, a little woozy from the wine, nodded.
âThanks, Mum,â she said and hugged her. It was the first time sheâd called her mother Mum and not Vanessa since she was seven, she suddenly realized. She was glad her mother was here, she thought. If only she could stay until Monday â see Mrs Sibson with her, talk to Leviâs parents. Take charge.
âIâll just go and say goodnight to Autumn,â Laura said.
Iâll tell her that itâs all over now , she thought. Iâll say: Levi wonât dare bully you again.
AUTUMN
A utumn lined her toys up in her bed as she had done every night since theyâd moved into the new house: Little Bear; Big Bear; Ruby, a patchwork alligator; Jerome, a black boy doll complete with male genitalia wearing a pink dress; Stephanie, a rabbit with a missing ear; Hum Drum the elephant; and George, a lion with a mane that Autumn had brushed until only a few wisps remained. They looked back at her with their glassine eyes, a small, raggedy army assembled to protect her from all the creaks and moans and groans in this eerie house. They all used to be in her bed but, during the night, her mother would always remove them. This was the compromise: they were still tucked in but at the foot of the bed.
Sheâd asked her grandmother to read her a bedtime story and her mother had looked pained. Autumn hated it when she hurt her feelings, and then, even worse, her mum tried to pretend she hadnât. But the alternative had been to hurt Grannyâs feelings and Granny was only here for a little bit. Sheâd said she was holding the fort while her mum was working over the weekend, but she was only holding it for a short time. Really, thought Autumn, she felt guilty about not visiting them sooner. Granny was leaving on Sunday. Autumn counted to herself: two more
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