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Book: Beyond Tantra: Healing Through Taoist Sacred Sex by Mieke Wik, Stephan Wik
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Authors: Mieke Wik, Stephan Wik
Tags: Religión, General, Sex, Self-Help, Taoism, Body; Mind & Spirit, Healing, Sexuality & Gender Studies, Sexual Instruction, Mysticism, Religious aspects, Hygiene; Sexual, Findhorn Press, ISBN-13: 9781844090631, Hygiene; Taoist
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explanation is that I was brought up to be a good Catholic girl, and good girls don’t do such things! I thought I had grown out of all this but it just goes to show how hard it is to get rid of these old thought-forms and patterns! I decided this was silly; I don’t need this childhood stuff anymore, I told myself: let it go! We are both here to learn and experiment, and have fun.
I did not change over night. Slowly I allowed myself to stimulate my nipples while Stephan was watching. Then I noticed that he became even more aroused when he was watching me, especially when I stroked my pubic area, and clitoris.
I in turn became more excited, and so a dance was created between us. I had always known that men were more visually-oriented, but to experience this and play with it was new for me! I liked it; it was fun!
After this insight, our sessions changed. I often started off with stimulating myself, watching Stephan getting more aroused. It also helped him to relax more, as he no longer felt he had to do all the hard work to ‘warm me up’, at least in his mind.
What was happening with me? I was slowly changing the image I had of myself: I was slowly accepting that I was a sexy woman, and enjoyed myself, that I allowed myself to show this, that it gave me pleasure. Yes, I’m responsible for my own sexuality. I’m in charge; I don’t always need to wait for someone else to give me pleasure!
tantrapp 16/7/05 5:30 pm Page 60
60
Beyond Tantra – Healing Through Taoist Sacred Sex The Tension Release Exercise
Goals
• Free up tension in your body with non-sexual massage
• Learn how to communicate positively about physical sensation Duration
One to two hours
Note: Powerful feelings and emotions can be released, sometimes quite unexpectedly, when you start to work with touch. This is normal and totally OK. You don’t have to do anything at all except ‘be there’ for your partner while he or she is experiencing the emotions or feelings. You don’t have to ‘fix’ it or make it better. If asked, hold your partner in a gentle embrace. The feelings will pass. It’s very healing.
What you’ll need to create your ‘Sacred Sex Space’
• A peaceful, warm space – ideally not your bedroom.
• You may want to invest in a mattress and washable cover for your ongoing exercises and ‘Sacred Sex’ time.
• Some nice music (see the Reference section for suggestions), candles and/or incense and any other thing you feel will create a special atmosphere.
• Some massage oil in a small bowl. Unscented almond oil is ideal; however, your local health-food shop will certainly have a range to choose from.
• Some towels that are OK to get oily, as you’ll need to wash them afterwards.
• A small clock with a second-hand.
Description
It doesn’t matter if you have never given a massage before, as the purpose of the exercise is not about working with muscles or even stimulating any
tantrapp 16/7/05 5:30 pm Page 61
Practising Sacred Touch – Tension Release Excercise 61
particular part of the body. If you discover, as we did, that massage is a crucial part of getting your sexual energy going, you may want to do an introductory course or buy some ‘how-to’ books or videos to learn more about different techniques. Most people do just fine ‘going with flow’, however. The most important thing, as you will soon see, is communication.
Decide from the beginning whether you wish to be totally naked or not. This exercise is not about becoming sexually excited. We are all different when it comes to our level of comfort with being naked and how much the sight of a naked body gets our sexual energy going. If you find that you ‘just can’t help yourself ’ in the presence of a beautiful, naked man or woman, then a light wrap might help keep proceedings cooler.
I suggest you begin all of your practice sessions with a Greeting Ritual. This is a very simple, ancient practice that simply means taking time
I did not change over night. Slowly I allowed myself to stimulate my nipples while Stephan was watching. Then I noticed that he became even more aroused when he was watching me, especially when I stroked my pubic area, and clitoris.
I in turn became more excited, and so a dance was created between us. I had always known that men were more visually-oriented, but to experience this and play with it was new for me! I liked it; it was fun!
After this insight, our sessions changed. I often started off with stimulating myself, watching Stephan getting more aroused. It also helped him to relax more, as he no longer felt he had to do all the hard work to ‘warm me up’, at least in his mind.
What was happening with me? I was slowly changing the image I had of myself: I was slowly accepting that I was a sexy woman, and enjoyed myself, that I allowed myself to show this, that it gave me pleasure. Yes, I’m responsible for my own sexuality. I’m in charge; I don’t always need to wait for someone else to give me pleasure!
tantrapp 16/7/05 5:30 pm Page 60
60
Beyond Tantra – Healing Through Taoist Sacred Sex The Tension Release Exercise
Goals
• Free up tension in your body with non-sexual massage
• Learn how to communicate positively about physical sensation Duration
One to two hours
Note: Powerful feelings and emotions can be released, sometimes quite unexpectedly, when you start to work with touch. This is normal and totally OK. You don’t have to do anything at all except ‘be there’ for your partner while he or she is experiencing the emotions or feelings. You don’t have to ‘fix’ it or make it better. If asked, hold your partner in a gentle embrace. The feelings will pass. It’s very healing.
What you’ll need to create your ‘Sacred Sex Space’
• A peaceful, warm space – ideally not your bedroom.
• You may want to invest in a mattress and washable cover for your ongoing exercises and ‘Sacred Sex’ time.
• Some nice music (see the Reference section for suggestions), candles and/or incense and any other thing you feel will create a special atmosphere.
• Some massage oil in a small bowl. Unscented almond oil is ideal; however, your local health-food shop will certainly have a range to choose from.
• Some towels that are OK to get oily, as you’ll need to wash them afterwards.
• A small clock with a second-hand.
Description
It doesn’t matter if you have never given a massage before, as the purpose of the exercise is not about working with muscles or even stimulating any
tantrapp 16/7/05 5:30 pm Page 61
Practising Sacred Touch – Tension Release Excercise 61
particular part of the body. If you discover, as we did, that massage is a crucial part of getting your sexual energy going, you may want to do an introductory course or buy some ‘how-to’ books or videos to learn more about different techniques. Most people do just fine ‘going with flow’, however. The most important thing, as you will soon see, is communication.
Decide from the beginning whether you wish to be totally naked or not. This exercise is not about becoming sexually excited. We are all different when it comes to our level of comfort with being naked and how much the sight of a naked body gets our sexual energy going. If you find that you ‘just can’t help yourself ’ in the presence of a beautiful, naked man or woman, then a light wrap might help keep proceedings cooler.
I suggest you begin all of your practice sessions with a Greeting Ritual. This is a very simple, ancient practice that simply means taking time
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